(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.)

I'm sad to announce this evening that our democracy is near almost complete extinction. There's a small group of insignificant terrorists who wish to throttle our freedoms and bring us back to the Stone Age with laws and rules that have never been heard of before. If you think The Handmaid's Tale is a nightmare, well this cult of fascists will make you wish you lived in 1930s Germany. I can't even believe what I'm about to tell you, and the reason why is because it's 2023 and this ideology has no place in a modern society. Nevertheless, there's been a sharp rise in the most horrific worldview that has ever existed. Of course, I'm talking about Christian nationalism, the horror, I know. In fact, these extremists claim that our nation, the United States of America, was founded by Christians who used the Bible as their basis for laws. What revisionist history? Can you imagine how awful America would be right now if that was true? A country based on the Bible would devolve into utter chaos. Think about this, what if our founders had allowed its citizens to go to church freely? If they had the right to defend themselves with guns? If criminals were punished according to books like Leviticus? If the national currency wasn't held by a private organization who could print more money whenever they want? What a barbaric, patriarchal, homophobic purgatory that would be. But these radicals are serious. They not only want to rewrite the history books, they want to bring this hellish dream to a reality. They even want to limit and restrict men from being able to turn into a woman. What a bunch of closed-minded bigots. They deny the most obvious scientific truths that the world, for example, the world exploded from nothing, and our great ancestors are rocks, bacteria, and monkeys. We have video evidence that all scientists agree that evolution is an observable fact if given enough time to observe it. Google it. Google never lies to you. Facebook fact check it if you don't believe me. They have the answers. Snopes will even tell you that science is science. I'm afraid, though, that most of you watching this right now have fallen victim to their brainwashing and you might be skeptical, but I warn you, don't deny believing your lying eyes when you see something you don't know if you're seeing because you're not allowed to see it. Just trust us. These people are bad. The worst kind of awful. I can't even describe how bad they are. It's that bad. But ultimately, no matter what you want to call them, those who want God back in government are the most dangerous, hostile traitors and domestic terrorists of them all. The worst in all of human history. Because they have the Baptist bias.