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you you Well good morning everyone welcome to Mountain Baptist Church Take your song books and turn to song 193 so we're gonna try a new song it was new to all of us up here, so Well seeing you may have the joy bells Does anybody know this song already Anybody there perfect awesome all right well Henry knows things we practice it this morning all right if you would stand We'll sing song 193 You may have the joy bells ringing in your heart and a piece that from you never will depart Walk the straight and narrow way live for Jesus every day He will keep the joy bells ringing in your heart joy Bells ringing in your heart joy Bells ringing in your heart Take the Savior here below with you everywhere you go And it will keep the joy bells ringing in your heart love of Jesus in its fullness you may know and This love to those around you sweetly show Words of kindness always say deeds of mercy to each day Then I'll keep the joy bells ringing in your heart joy bells ringing in your heart joy Bells ringing in your heart Take the Savior here below with you everywhere you go Then I'll keep the joy bells ringing in your heart You will meet the trials as you journey home Grace efficient. He will give you overcome The one seen by mortal I he is with you ever not and they'll keep the joy bells ringing in your heart joy Bells ringing in your heart joy Bells Ringing in your heart Take the Savior here below with you everywhere you go and it'll keep the joy Bells ringing in your heart left Well of Jesus every day Own his right to every service you can pay Sinners you can help to win if your life is pure and clean and you keep the joy bells ringing in your heart joy Bells ringing in your heart joy Bells ringing in your heart Take the Savior here below with you everywhere you go And you keep the joy bells ringing in your heart All Right, let's pray Heavenly Father Lord again We just want to thank you God for another Sunday morning that we get to gather in your house and to hear and learn from your word I pray Lord now that you just give us hearts to hear and And just the willingness to act on your word and again, we love you and pray all this in Jesus name. Amen All you may be seated and take your Mountain Baptist song books The blue folders there in your folders your Mountain Baptist Psalms hymns and spiritual song books And turn to page number seven Page number seven in your mountain Baptist song bus will sing Psalm 117 on page number seven. Oh Praise the Lord all ye nations Praise him all ye people For his merciful kindness is great toward us And the truth of the Lord endure forever Praise ye the Lord Praise ye the Lord Amen Well, welcome to Mount Baptist Church on this Sunday morning and my announcement sheet here so Coming to the end of January here and so Service times today should be normal. We'll have our afternoon service at 4 p.m. I am Capping off the the spiritual gifts sermon or series I guess tonight And then but before that we're gonna have our soul winning time at 1 p.m. It is supposed to be raining At least that's what it's calling for. So we'll try to find something covered so we don't all get drenched But we're still gonna go soul winning At 1 p.m. So get some lunch get back here before then. We'll get teamed up go out soul winning and then And then also the regional so many times on here The Monday one I would just plan on that one not happening Many of you know, but miss Paula has been in the hospital. And so just be in prayer for her. Hopefully she'll get out here soon But obviously we want her to be there as long as she has to be there to get past What she's been dealing with and so but brother Charles obviously has been there with her most of the time And so just being prayer for the Crandall family And and and Paula and everything there so and so most of you probably know about that, but but either way and keep praying for her and And then but the the regional sewing times there just beyond the church group the whatsapp group As far as the the times and locations and everything throughout the week and then on the the upcoming events we have the women's prayer meeting on The 18th of February and the men's prayer meeting on the 23rd And then we have the solely marathon And on the 10th, so not this coming weekend next weekend Kingwood, West Virginia, so Kingwood we did a Sony marathon in Terra Alta Kingwoods before that so if you went to Terra Alta then this one's even closer. So but Excited about that one. They want to do that one for a while. We actually have the Kingwood map on the wall there So it's about time we we put some some markings on that one so but if you can't make it out to that being prayer for it, but We're gonna be meeting up at Hardee's and then Yeah, we'll figure out basically the plan I think we're probably just gonna do one big push on that one have we've been doing recently is Just maybe not going out as super as early as like 10 o'clock maybe but at the same time Like going out past lunch and then kind of having like a late lunch if you will so So anyway be in prayer for that that coming up There are some men that are gonna be doing some missions trips India right India and then Belize Is the Poland thing happening work by the way? Yeah Poland brother wage is going all over the place so he's just I told me needs to get a fedora and He needs to do it in a propeller plane So he could be like Indiana Jones and then we'll do we'll do one of those map jumps You know where it goes from from place to place. So but either way be in prayer for For that that stuff as well going Going forward here. I think it wasn't April so and Then on our chapter memory. We're not done with January yet So you still have some time to get Genesis one down, but we're gonna do the book of Jonah. So going into February here The chapters are pretty short in Jonah and there's four chapters So we're just gonna go chapter one next month chapter two and going down the line. So Jonah chapter one will be February And then Proverbs 26 20 where no wood is there the fire goes out So where there is no tailbearer the stripes cease it so Proverbs 26 20 is our memory verse for the week we do we are Gonna be finishing up our New Testament read so We're gonna have I think we're gonna have to eventually get a count on how many people are so basically maybe on We'll just have to figure that out how we get that So if you think you're gonna get it done, I mean then just go ahead and tell us but Maybe we'll just send out a message As far as who is getting through that so So, yeah that that's there now if you say hey I want to do it in the month of February You can still get a gift card. So but Yeah, so that being said It doesn't bother me if you waited another month you waited a month to start it so And then birthdays. We've got a lot of good ones coming up. So no, uh so Miss Linda, which she's not here this morning, but that's Paula's mom And me and and I have the same birthday. So tomorrow is my birthday Samuels is Tuesday And so I'm I'm gonna be 39 same there's gonna be one wait what Now his is 30th He's a day after my birthday Yeah, that'd be horrible if I was like that far off And then Wade is the 31st And Jack is the second so Yeah, Jack Slagle, so yeah, we got a bunch this coming up week here so So we just celebrated Samuels birthday, so if I'm like if I pass out During the sermons because I ate too much sugar yesterday So Just cake and like pizza and everything else. My diet just went out the window yesterday And so I'm still still like recovering physically from from that yesterday, but So that is the birthdays coming up pregnancies Well first by the way, how are you how are you gonna be Are you really I don't know you're you're older than me I should know that the big 40 Yeah, I still got another year What about Dave yeah, you're this year, so how's that make you feel So and then those that are about 40, I'm sorry, you know It's all downhill from here no You Know what I'll say this I love this age my 30s and Unless and when I hit 40, I just like completely crumbled, you know Like just all my bones break and I just like fall apart. I really like this age, you know, so the 20s Now give me my 30s and yay into my 40s 50s And then when you get into 60s, you know, you just get your house in order You know, I'm just kidding Just remember Caleb was 85 years old and he was still going out and coming in and so So pregnancies we have Alyssa and as far as I know she hasn't given birth yet, so Being prayer for her and then Anastasia and Tabby are coming up in this month as far as their due dates and in February And then miss crystal McCloy Who's pregnant with twins? So? Be in prayer for her and the Chloe family there As far as announcements go I think that's about all I have So offering boxes in the back there if you want to give a tie than an offering mother baby rooms for the mothers babies only brother David is reading Proverbs 26 for us this morning But Dave's gonna sing another song well, we'll do the birthdays birthday songs All right, take your song books and turn to song 160 Song 160 in your song books will sing crown him with many crowns But before we do that we need to sing happy birthday this whole list of people so we got Wait, where's the certain Okay, pastor Samuel Wade Jack All right, you guys all want to stand up All right Samuel's one Jack is two Pastor is 39 And I can't think of a good I can't think of a good thing to say over when I say oh you're so old Wait, dude, you're so old Gotcha All right, all right, yeah, you're the new date, okay Make fun of him now next All right, we'll sing happy birthday to all y'all everybody's standing up Jack there you go right up here buddy All right, we'll sing. Happy birthday. Ready? Here we go. Happy birthday To you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday God bless you Happy birthday to you Well, happy birthday to y'all. All right, and then we will sing song 160 Crown him with many crowns the lamb upon his throne Our Heavenly Drowns all music but its own Awake my soul and see of him who died for thee and As my matchless King through all eternity Oh Behold his hands and sigh rich moons yet visible Above and beauty glorified No angel in the sky I can fully bear that side But downward bends his wandering. I had mystery so bright Crown him the Lord of life Who triumphed o'er the grave Who rose? Victorious to the strife for those he came to save His glories now we see Who died and rose on high? Who died Eternal life to bring and lives that death may die I Crown him the Lord of One with the father known one with the Spirit through him gift from yonder Glorious throne to the be endless praise For thou for us has died Be thou or through endless days adored and magnified All right, take your Bibles and turn to the book of Proverbs chapter number 26 Proverbs chapter number 26 in your Bibles and we'll have brother David read that please Proverbs 26, if you found your place, amen. And the Bible reads as snow and summer and as rain and harvest Our honor is not seemingly for a fool as the bird by wandering as the swallow by flying So the curse causeless shall not come a whip for the hearse a bridle for the ass and a rod for the fool's back Answer not a fool according to his folly lest thou be like unto him Answer a fool according to his folly lest he be wise in his own conceit He that sendeth the messes by the hand of a fool cutteth off their feet and drinketh damage The legs of the lame are not equal So is a parable in the mouth of fools and see that bindeth the stone in a sling So is he that giveth honor to a fool as a throne that goeth up in the hand of a drunkard So is a parable in the mouth of fools the great God that formed all things both We wrote at the fool and we wrote of transgressors as a dog returneth to his vomit So a fool returneth to his folly. See as though a man rise in his own conceit There is no hope of a fool than of him The sloth will remain saith there is a lion in the way a lion is in the streets as the door turneth upon his hands So doth the slothful upon his bed The slothful hideth his hand in his bosom agree with him to bring it again to his mouth The slugget is wiser in his own conceit than seven men that can render a reason He that passeth by and meddleth with strife belonging not to him is like one that taketh the dog by the ears As a madman who cast the firebrands arrows and death So is the man that deceiveth his neighbor and saith him not iron spurt Where no wood is there the fire goeth out So where there is no tail bearer the stripe ceaseth As coals are out of burning coals and wood defy so is a contentious man to kindle strife The words of a tail bearer as runes they go down into the innermost parts of the belly Burning lips and a wicked heart are like a potsherd covered with silver dross He that hateth symboleth with his lips and hateth up to seat within him when he speaketh fair believe him not for there are seven Abominations in his heart whose hatred is covered by deceit his wickedness shall be served before the whole congregation Whoso digeth the pits shall fall them in and he that woeeth the stone it will return upon him A lying tongue hateth those that are afflicted by it and a flattering mouth with a rune That's very dear Lord. I thank you for this opportunity to come back to your house But you go pass with me spirit. Hope was all be edified in Jesus name. Amen Amen so you're there in progress 26 name the sermon is Where there is no tail bearer where there is no tail bearer now. I preached a sermon It's probably like three over three years ago I was actually trying to see if it was on our YouTube channel but it's not so I don't know if it's it's in the archive somewhere or it's Just lost because there was a period where I didn't get things recorded when we were transferring over and stuff like that But it was called Taddlers tail bearers bearers and busy bodies, but basically dealing with this subject and so it's been a little while But I want to preach on this subject about tail bearing or being a busy body And this is something that is pertinent for everybody But the idea here is that we don't want to be tail bearers. We don't want to be toddlers we don't want to be busy bodies and There's big reasons why we don't want to do that one big reason is unity within the church But but I'm gonna be getting into this subject and in the first portion. I'm gonna see here is in verse verse 17 is That usually when you're dealing with tail bearing or tattling or being a busy body you're you're you're you're meddling into other people's business I mean, that's kind of the whole idea of being a busy body is that you're not You know not minding your own business But it says in verse 17 it says he that pacify and meddleth with strife Belonging not to him is like one that taketh a dog by the ears As a madman who cast firebrands arrows and death. So is the man that deceiveth his neighbor and Seth am not I in sport We all know that person, you know where it's like they're they're Poking fun or they're they're trying they're messing with you or something like that or they're making fun of you and they're like Oh, I was just kidding, you know, you know that type of thing where they just try to blow it off Even though they're really trying to hurt your feelings or whatever But in verse 20 here, it says where no wood is there the fire goeth out. So where there is no tailbearer The strife cease it as coals are to burning coals and wood to fire So is can a contentious man to kindle strike the words of a tailbearer our wounds and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly So tail bearing what are we talking about? Well, you're bearing a tail, right? And we're not talking about tail like a dog's tail or something like that We're talking about like, you know, like a like a story, right? So basically a tale about somebody That's being born to someone else, right? So you're basically telling someone else about something else that's going on That's in in context. I believe it's strife not belonging to you, right? There's maybe something going on That is going on over here and you're basically bringing that message over to someone else that doesn't know about it And so this is something that's especially with our kids. I Don't know about you, but I tell my kids not to tattle not to be tattlers You know, I don't necessarily tell them that snitches get stitches But that kind of concept of not being a tattler now with that there's obviously There's obviously exceptions to the rule right it's kind of like if my if one of my My kids is about to basically Throw themselves off of like a two-story building Yeah, my kids need to tell me about that right if there's someone that's in danger If it's something that someone's gonna get hurt then yes, you tell me that's not tattling. Okay, but you know how it is, you know Your kids come up to me like she did this or she said this or or he Pushed me or he did this or that and it's not like necessarily something. It's not life-or-death situations and they're doing it You all know this everybody has kids. The reason they're doing it is to get their sibling in trouble In most all the cases right? It's like I want them to get in trouble Because you know for whatever reason right like maybe they're maybe their siblings annoying them and therefore You know, basically they go and tell the parents saying hey I need you know, someone so is doing this someone someone's doing that and I always ask them said why are you telling me this? What's the reason why you're telling me this and like well, you know, they're not supposed to be doing that It's like yeah, but the reason you're telling me this it's not because you really care about them doing what they should be doing You just want to get them in trouble, right? You have like some kind of vendetta to get them in trouble or whatever, right? So this is what it turns into is this tail bearing into tattling and I want you to see in Leviticus chapter 19 There's an explicit command not to be a tail bearer in The law now you say well, you know that's been done away, you know, Leviticus Well, you know then loved thy neighbor as thyself be done away because actually in the same passage. So This is obviously something that should still apply Because we're dealing with moral laws, right? If it's if it was wrong to tattle in the Old Testament wrong to tattle in the New Testament If it's wrong to tail bear and the Old Testament it's wrong now in verse 15 It says ye shall do no unrighteousness in judgment Thou shalt not respect the persons of the poor nor honor the person of the mighty but in righteousness shalt thou judge thy neighbor Thou shalt not go up and down as a tail bearer among thy people neither shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbor I am the Lord thou shalt not have hate thou shalt not hate thy brother in thy heart thou shalt in any wise rebuke thy neighbor Not suffer sin upon him thou shalt not avenge nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people But thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself I am the Lord which by the way, that's the only place in the Old Testament that it states I shall love thy neighbor as thyself. So this is obviously something that would still be pertinent in the New Testament but what you have to understand here is that The reason when you're talking about tail bearing among the people is is It's not saying that you if someone commits some grievous sin You know, like someone murder somebody and be like, I can't tell anybody I can't be a tail bearer Right. The thing is is that there are there's a lot of things when it comes to this Christian life that are subjective There's a lot of things that are subjective. Okay? Okay, as far as like how people live their lives how people How people raise their kids what they watch what they don't watch what they wear what they don't wear what they consider to be modest and what you consider to be modest and This is something especially because our church has a lot of standards, you know, we all have we all have different differing standards though, right? All right, we would all say that you know Well men should wear that was pertaining to a man and women should wear that was pertaining to a woman But as far as the modesty level goes there's going to be differences there And what we don't want is we don't want people basically talking behind someone's back saying well I think that this person over here is being not being modest or this person. I wouldn't wear that well then don't wear it and I'll say this as long as you're not naked You know when you're coming in this hat and obviously if you're not like a man coming in here in like a straight-up drag Dress right and a woman coming in here and like and basically like some bull dyke outfit Okay, like she's wearing a tool belt with like the straight-up like Like where's the plumber where's your where's your where's your toilet I need to fix your toilet Okay Now we don't have different standards as far as where that line is that okay? Because obviously I believe that women should wear dresses men should wear pants. That's kind of like the you the universal basically what What the standard is right and this isn't a sermon on like dress standards But I'll say this women that wear really really tight yoga pants. That's not a man's garment Okay It's not modest either. Okay, so That being said I'm not gonna be like that person's abomination although I would say That's not modest right you're showing every curve of your body That's not smart to do in front of other men Okay But here's thing if someone comes walking in here Let's say someone is coming to our church, and they come to our church They know my standards They know where I stand on that and they still come in here, and they're wearing like women's what we call women's pants You know what I'm gonna do Absolutely nothing I'm not gonna talk to my wife about can you believe? This woman that keeps coming in and just still wearing wearing those slacks and wearing those jeans Why because it's there's things that are just one there there It's a it's subjective because someone could have the argument and say well This is women that's men whatever and you know everybody's got the right to be wrong, but the idea there Is that is that the hill we're gonna die on is that what I'm gonna basically Sacrifice unity over When it comes to where our standards are at I could say hey, you know what those aren't really pants unless they're Duluth And that's extreme right like that's not those aren't real pants unless it has a gusset It's like well, yeah, I mean that's taking it a little far You know some people could say well, you're not a prophet because you're not wearing a rough garment Right so do I need a camel's hair suit listen they make them Do I need a camel hair suit for you to be like all right John the Baptist What do you got to say right? Do you see how like you can take these things too far But the thing is is that when you're talking about tail-bearing a lot of times is dealing with stuff That's subjective and there are times where it's dealing with stuff. That's maybe even sin objectively But the question is is it any of your business? Okay, and that's what it really comes down to is that when you're talking about tail-bearing is that you're meddling into other people's business and When we're talking about tail-bearing it's not that someone can't tell you that they have a problem and you talk to them about it That's not tail-bearing When it becomes tail-bearing is when you take what they said and you tell someone else And then they take what they say and they tell someone else And they take what they say and they tell someone else Let me show you some other verses on that's good a proper chapter 11 verse 12. I'm gonna do a little exercise We'll see how it works out. I'm gonna use the kids as an illustration This may not work out for my illustration at all if this fails then just ignore it, okay But you ever play that phone the telephone game we're gonna try that okay, and so Proverbs chapter 11 verse 12. It says he that is void of wisdom to spy this his neighbor but a man of understanding holdeth his peace a tail-bearer Revealest secrets, but he does of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter Now I know we joke about brother Dave he can't keep a secret, you know when it's like when it comes to like, you know Revealing that you know If you're like trying to figure, you know, figure out if someone's pregnant or not, you know, like your time telling that I'm sorry. I'm just I'm throwing you under the bus. I Wouldn't consider that tail-bearing I was just I would consider that more of just like He's just excited, you know, some people are just really excited to tell the news, you know But that's an example of news that's gonna get you know that that's meant to get out, you know When we're talking about tail-bearing we're talking about secrets that people want to keep confidential right or that basically I think about things that Shouldn't be out in the public, right? They shouldn't be out in the public But you know what maybe you're you know, and the multitude of counselors there's wisdom obviously I understand like sometimes you want counsel and people come to me for counsel and all that but The difference is you know, like the Catholic priests, you know, they do like confessions and stuff like that Is that everything is in confidence? So if you tell you tell if you tell them like you cold-blooded like murdered somebody then they're supposed to not tell anybody Listen, if you come up to me and tell me that you kill somebody in cold blood. I'm telling somebody No, that's that is not tail-bearing. That's just like that's a that's capital crimes right there. Okay, you commit a crime Then you know I'm just telling you out front, you know that if you can find that to me then that's gonna be out but But there's many things that people have come to me to talk about and I'm not I don't tell my wife about it I don't you know, sometimes maybe I'll tell the leadership because you know, obviously, you know in the multitude of counselors Wisdom and but I'll always say hey, do you mind if I talk to let's say brother Dave about it, right? Let's say someone comes to me and they're like, hey, I need counsel in this area Could be family. It could be anything from a job. It could be anything, you know, anything like that, right? I'll always ask them I say hey Do you mind if I ask brother Dave's opinion on this so that we can kind of you know? Two heads are better than one Sometimes sometimes we'll get some bounce some ideas off as far as like what's the best route to go about things? But Proverbs 11 verse 12 it says I'm sorry Proverbs 18 go to Proverbs 18 and verse 8 just want to show you that Proverbs sits on this a lot Proverbs 18 and verse 8 Proverbs 18 verse 8 says the words of a tail-bearer are as wounds and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly What you understand is that tail-bearing does hurt people, okay? It hurts it a lot of times it hurts the person that you're telling the tale for And Proverbs 20 verse 19 says this he that goeth about as a tail-bearer reveals secrets therefore metal not with them With him that flat earth with his lips. The idea here is that someone tells you a secret someone tells you something confidential You know what you're supposed to do is just keep that between you and them, okay? Just to be honest with you. I don't want to know your secrets, okay? When it comes to like I will if if you really want my counsel and what my thoughts on something I'm not saying like don't come to me or anything like that But I'm not Desiring to know what's going on in your life Whether you know what problems you have or whatever I Want them to not be problems. I want you to have a good marriage I want you to have you know, you know that be doing well with your children and raising your children I want your jobs to be going well. I want I want all that to be true But I don't need to know all the details. Okay, I just don't I just don't like knowing all the details to be honest with you and when it comes down to it is that I think all of us we all have our own problems And that's enough to deal with Then deal with other person's problems now, that doesn't mean that you can't help people out and I'm gonna be getting to that But this is not a way to help them out Spreading it to other people is not going to help the situation. It's only gonna make it worse Spreading that information If you want reconciliation, let's say there's a problem Let's say there's a problem between like two brothers in Christ in the church and then there's basically This person's over here. Like, you know, you know what he said over here You know what this person did over here and then all that stuff gets spread around Well now now instead of being able to just kind of reconcile that between yourselves and be like, hey I know this went on this went on. Let's just shake hands and move on then. No one knows about it It's not it's just under the radar. No one knows anything about it It's not a big deal. But then if it gets it's spread around the church. Well now everybody knows about it Well that person may be embarrassed one of the person one of the people involved may be embarrassed now and now they don't want to come to church because everybody knows about what they did and Therefore they're just like I don't want to be here because I feel embarrassed You see how that can hurt The the people involved So Go to Proverbs chapter 16 this gets into whispering, you know when your tail bearing And Proverbs 16 verse 27. It says an ungodly man diggeth up evil and in his lips there is as burnt a burning fire a Thrower man, so a strife and a whisperer separated chief friends You don't turn every you can if you want Proverbs 17 9 says he that covereth the transgressions seeketh love But he that repeateth the matter separated very friends in Verse 14 of that same chapter. It says the beginning of strife is as when one letteth out water Therefore leave off contention before it be meddled with listen once that information is out there. It's out there Okay, once that information is out there and everybody knows about it Even if it's not true Let's say let's say an accusation comes out there or people are whispering about something. It's not even true It's out there. Good luck trying to gather it up Good luck trying to basically go to every person that ever heard it and tell them Hey, by the way, that information you heard was wrong It's like when newspapers put out false, you know False reports on people and then they put a retraction in on page like 27 I'd be like, yeah, by the way, what we what we wrote was false and that didn't yeah, except no one read that and Everybody still thinks that this is true everybody still thinks that that this is you know, who this person is and what they did and Therefore you're basically tarnishing that person's reputation because of that it definitely hurts the people involved when it comes to tail bearing and It gets into backbiting whispering and Let's try this game I'm gonna try this this telephone game. Okay, never done I've done this was as a kid So let me see here. So let's get the the Gandy the Gandy girls and in Brooklyn Where's Clara at? Clara and Anna Here come up here real quick It may not work because a lot of times when you do this it's like a lot of people But I kind of have confidence this is gonna work so So Claire I want you to stand here so yeah come up here what I want you to do is That I'm gonna tell Clara This is the way telephone works. Okay I'm gonna tell Clara something. I'm gonna whisper her something and Then she's gonna say you guys got to spread out because I don't want everybody to hear Okay, so basically I want you to go down the line here and I want you to have like spacing between you So yep, right there Anna and then Avery right here and then go down the line Maybe Henry right in front of your sister Avery and Then keep going down the line. Okay so the way this works is is that I whisper something into Claire's ear and then she whispers it into Anna's ear and Then Anna whispers it into Avery's ear and Then so on and so forth right you need to spread out spread because if the other person hears it That's the whole point of what's gonna happen here. Is that what I say to her Ends up changing completely by the time you get to the end of the line And it's not like I'm telling her to change it. Okay, so come up here Clara. I'm gonna I Got to turn off my mic I Tell your sister, you got to tell Bella. I have a feeling this might work, just by that expression right there. Now you can't ask Avery, you got to get it from Henry. Did you get anything Bella? Avery, you can tell Bella. We'll take out the middle man on this one. The message is lost already. That's what you got? Socks? Shoes and socks. I'm surprised you got socks out of it. You can all sit down. Thanks. In that example, they didn't get one word, but let me ask you a question. Isn't every word important when it comes to a message? If I said I was angry with my brother, there's something that's important there. Is there a cause or is there not a cause? How about the negating term not? If not is not there, that's important information. Just information lost, which in that case we didn't even get to the end of the line actually. If you really were to look at that, basically the message is completely gone. At that point, Henry could have just made up anything and just said hey, this is what they said. But the whole point of the matter is that when you go from one person to another, second hand news is going to be less reliable than from the source. And third hand, fourth hand, fifth hand, sixth hand is going to be even less reliable. There's been cases where I'll talk to somebody, someone will come talk to me about something, and then I'll hear through hearsay through like third or fourth hand, and it's completely different than what I heard from the source. And so that's something that you have to understand is that as it goes down the line, I don't care if it's your wife that tells you it. If your wife tells you something that someone else told her, even if your wife is not trying to twist the truth, not trying to embellish anything, it is very much possible that the information is getting distorted through the grapevine. Because we're human, we leave off information or we embellish information just by nature. I don't know about you, I just don't remember things when it comes to details. My wife can testify to that. Well, there's that, there's that. There's definitely an age thing, but you know what, even outside of being old, even outside of that, I just don't remember all the details. So if you don't remember the details, guess what, those details are important for the story to be accurate. So if I were to talk about something and then I left out a crucial detail, like if I said, hey, pastor was holding his child underneath the water, then you'd be like, what in the world, he's trying to drown his kid? What's going on? Except for the fact that it's like, no, they were swimming, and you're teaching your child to swim underneath the water, right? Do you see how crucial information can be completely out of sorts? He's holding his child underneath the water, they can't breathe, they're going to die. Except for the fact that you're actually doing something, they're enjoying what they're doing, and it's actually very much innocent, okay? So when it comes to this tail bearing, what you have to understand is that that information is being brought from one person to another in a lot of cases is not going to be accurate. Think about this, in 2 Corinthians chapter 13 and verse 1 it says, this is the third time I am coming to you, in the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established. When you hear a story, how many witnesses do you have about that? And let me ask you a question, who's going to be more, what's going to be more accurate, the source or some other person that heard it from the source? If you hear something from somebody and they're not the person that is dealing with, go to the source. Go to the source. And if the source gives you different information, go with the source's information. So this is something that, like I said, when it comes to tail bearing, when it comes to basically tattling on people, this is something that can cause a rift in church unity. But let me state this, go to 1 Corinthians chapter 5. There are cases where stuff needs to be brought to another person or it needs to be brought to the church, dealing with church discipline, but these are very serious things that you're dealing with here. 1 Corinthians chapter 5 and verse 11. And for sake of time, I'm not going to go through the whole story of 1 Corinthians chapter 5 and verse 11, but it says, but now I have written unto you not to keep company if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner, with such in one know not to eat. So there are cases where someone can be kicked out of church and fornication is one of those. That would include adultery. That if that was brought to our attention that someone is actively committing adultery or actively committing fornication, then therefore there's something that may need to be done. Now what you have to understand too is that even if someone is in fornication, that doesn't mean that I have to immediately kick them out of church. Even Jezebel was given a space to repent and she was teaching and causing people to commit fornication and adultery with her. And Jesus said that he gave her a space to repent and she repented not. Now, when it comes to that, you know whose job that is to figure out how much space they get? My job. I'm the pastor. And how much space that's given is up to me on whether I do that. Now, if someone is into something that's not in this list, obviously we're taking out crimes. Crime is not what we're talking about. It's crime obviously, right? What if someone was a pedophile? Then they're going to be out that door. What are you talking about? We're talking about brothers in Christ. So take Jeffrey Dahmer and the pedophiles out the window. That's obviously not in this list. But if someone is in, let's say someone is doing something that you don't approve of. Or they, you know, I'm trying to think of something that, okay. Let me just say this, okay. Let's say someone says, they took their family to Disney World. Okay. And you're like, you know Disney? You know what Disney's all about? They're peddling all that homo stuff and everything else. And, you know, I can't believe that they're taking their kids to Disney. I can't believe they let their kids watch Disney movies. Is that a case for like kicking someone out of church? Is that something that really needs to be brought up to my attention? Let me take it a step further. These parents over here let their kids watch rated R movies with smud in it. Is that something I need to take control of? Is that something that I need to call them up? And I need to say, hey, listen, unless you get this right, you're out. Let me take it a step further. Let's say there's people that are involved in pornography. I preached a whole sermon on, you know, the evils of pornography. You know where I stand on that. It's wicked. It'll destroy your life. It'll destroy your marriage. But people watching that stuff and getting involved in that stuff is not, that is not fornication. Watching fornication is not committing fornication. Okay. You want to play that game, then, well, you looked upon a woman with lust after her. Therefore, you're an adulterer. You're out. Are we doing thought crimes now? You don't have to agree with what's going on. And obviously, there are cases where there's people that marriages are being destroyed, families are being destroyed because garbage is going on in that marriage or in that family. But spreading it to everybody in the church isn't helping anything. And what you have to understand is that don't wait, when it comes to church discipline, you know what we want out of that? I don't want to kick someone out. What I want is reconciliation. Listen, you say, well, are there people that you don't want ever to come back? Yeah, reprobates. Yeah, people that are infiltrators. Yeah, people that hate God. But listen, any brother, any believer that gets it right is welcome back. Is it not working? Is my mic not working? Yeah, it's on. Okay. I was like, my wife's like pointing at my mic. I'm like, what in the world? Anyway, so any believer, if they get it right, they can come back. Now go to Matthew chapter 18. Here's another case where church discipline would take place here. But I want you to see how it goes down, how you deal with this. Okay, someone wrongs you. In this case, we're not talking about necessarily like some major earth-shattering sin like fornication or these different things. But maybe you just wronged a brother and you refused to get it right. You refused to reconcile with each other. Okay. In Matthew chapter 18, verse 15, it says, Moreover, if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone. If he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. You know what the first thing you should do with any type of situation is just go to them. Deal with it alone, privately. It's not something that needs to be broadcasted. But if he will not hear thee. Okay, so basically he's belligerent. He's just like, no, not doing it. If he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. Now what are you doing? You're basically taking two people with you just so they can witness and say this person will not reconcile with him. Right. You're not really tail-bearing. You're just basically like, I want you to be here to know that when I'm trying to reconcile with this person, I'm trying to get this right, they refuse. And now you have two to three, you at least have two witnesses with you saying, yes, he's right. He tried to reconcile and this person is just belligerent, won't get it right. Okay. If that doesn't work, then you take it before the whole church. Okay. It says, and if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church. And if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as a heathen man and a publican. So at that point, see, you've gone through like a three-step process to get things right with your brother. By the way, this isn't talking about some false teacher. This isn't talking about some pedophile. You know, people always try like, oh, Matthew 18, you didn't take it through the steps. That's because you're not in those steps. Because that doesn't apply to you. Okay. If you're in that category. Right. Someone comes in here and starts preaching a false gospel and I'll be like, well, let me get two or three witnesses with me. And then I'm going to bring it to the church if you don't hear them. No. I'm not going to give you an hour. So when you're dealing with this, what you have to understand is that if it's not an offense that's worthy to be. Let me say this. If you think it is, then come to me and say, hey, is this an offense worthy for church discipline? And if I say no, you have to follow my lead on that. Or convince me otherwise. Okay. So here's the thing. If you don't like how I'm dealing with that or you don't think that I should, you know, or maybe I should kick someone out that I'm not kicking out. Then you know what, you either have to bear that. But, you know, tail bearing about it isn't going to help anything. Because one thing, one, it doesn't help the people that are involved. But two, it also makes it look like the pastor isn't doing his job. If you go around saying that this person shouldn't be here, this person should be kicked out, this person should have church discipline and they're here. You know what that says? The pastor's not doing his job. So it is a big deal. It's a big deal how this goes down. And you may not be even thinking about that, right? I mean when it comes to like tail bearing, when it comes to, you know, tattling. All that stuff may not even be in your mind or in the equation when you're doing it. Okay. But that's what's going on. You're hurting the people that you're tail bearing about. In turn, if it's something that people think could be church discipline and it's not getting dealt with, then it looks like the leadership is failing. Okay. And so go to Galatians chapter 6. Galatians chapter 6. We do want to reconcile people. And what you have to understand is that church discipline is for that. Church discipline, it's just like disciplining your children. Do I beat my children just so that I can beat them? Do I do it to inflict pain or do I inflict pain for a purpose? The purpose is so that they get it right. So they turn out right. Why does the Lord chase us? Because He enjoys punishing us and just enjoys inflicting pain on us? No. He does it because He cares about us and He wants us to turn out right. The whole point of church discipline and kicking someone out is for the sole purpose of them getting it right and getting back in. Listen, if they get it right before you kick them out, guess what? You don't have to kick them out. The whole point of 1 Corinthians 5 is that the guy, they were not repentant. They weren't sorry. Basically, they're just like, I did nothing wrong kind of mentality. And if someone's like that, then yeah. I mean they have to be like, all right, well then you're out then. If you think that this is right, right? Like committing fornication or committing adultery with your father's wife. If you think that's right and you think that there's nothing wrong with that, then you're out the door. But if someone's like, yeah, I messed up. I'm sorry. Yeah, we're not doing that anymore. Then hey, we're good. It's not like we need to like make them do penance. You know what I mean? You know, like just be like shame on that person, you know. And just like, you know. There's no reason to basically put them as an outcast if they've gotten it right. Okay. So in Galatians chapter 6 and verse 1, it says this. It says, Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness. Considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. We are to try to restore those that are taken in a fault in the spirit of meekness. Now, again, the idea of telling everybody about what's going on is not mentioned here. Taddling on them. Be like, well, so and so did this. So and so did that. That's what children do. Children do that to make themselves look better. Children do that to get their siblings in trouble. Now, you know, sometimes I'll have to explain, you know, because I'm going to embarrass Clara. But Clara's all about speaking the truth and she's very meticulous about things being done right. To the point where like it'll be like, you know, 1132 right now. And if I said it's 1130 right now, she'd be like, no, it's 1132. And to the point where I've had to tell her like, hey, it's not lying if you're giving like kind of an estimate of what you're doing there, right. Like it's 1130, it's like, well, you just told a lie, dad, daddy, you know, because it's actually 1132, right. Which you can understand how a child's mind works there is that like, hey, it needs to be right. It needs to be exactly right, right. And so when it comes to, sometimes I do believe my children will say something because they literally think that I want to know. That I want to micromanage every little thing that all the siblings are doing and make sure that they never do anything out of step. And so I do think that there's some of that, but I'd say most of it, most of the time is because they want their sibling to get in trouble. Like or they want to look better than their siblings because like, well, you know, sometimes you ever get your children to say, when someone else is getting in trouble, they'll be like, well, daddy, I did right, didn't I? And they'll say something like that. And you know what they're doing, though. It's like, I'm better. Look at me, I didn't mess up, you know. And so there's always that, and lots of times our kids don't know that we know this, right. But know this, kids, we were kids once, too. You know, we use those same lines. We used to get our siblings in trouble all the time, too. And so this is something that can happen in church. This is something that can happen in the congregation, and we need to guard ourselves from it. There's nothing wrong with getting someone back into the fold, or restoring somebody, but it has to be done in the spirit of meekness. It needs to be done in love and compassion for everyone involved, okay. Not one-sided, everybody involved, okay. And listen, God's not a respected person, neither should you be. Even if you side with the one side. Listen, I side with Tabby over Dave on everything. But I still love Dave just as much as Tabby, okay. I'm joking. But the idea there is that there should be a love for both, even if you're closer to the other one, right. There's certain people that you're probably closer to in church, right. Everybody would probably say that to a certain extent, right. You have certain people that you hang out with more, you talk to more, whatever. Or you click with more. You don't give the people that you're closer to, you know, you don't give them more than the other people as far as when it comes to situations like that, right. Like, let's say there's something that goes down, and then you're just like, well, I know this person's in the right. It's like, are they though? You should look at both and say, hey, who's right here, and it shouldn't matter if you're friends with the one, or the other one annoys you, okay. Because maybe the one that annoys you is actually right. Because truth is, you know, when you think about justice is blind, right. But the idea that God is not a respected person is neither should we be. And so, when it comes to this stuff, when it comes to tail bearing, a lot of times it turns into this kind of like, I like this person, I don't like that person. And there's some other stuff I was going to get into here, but let's go to first Timothy chapter 5 and verse 11. First Timothy chapter 5 and verse 11. What I want to get to, I think one of the big roots to this problem of tail bearing and tattling and being busybodies is idleness. Idleness. So I'm going to, one, tell you what I believe one of the root problems is when it comes to this. It could be ignorance, right, some people just don't know, right. They just don't know that this is a problem, this shouldn't be done. But a lot of it has to do with idleness. And I'm going to show you here when it's dealing with younger women here in this case. Does this mean that only women can be tattlers and busybodies? No. Not at all. Does it tend to kind of go that direction? Yeah. Listen, there is a difference between men and women. I'll say this, by and large men don't care about details, they don't care about what's going on in other people's business. I'm not saying it doesn't happen. I'm just spitting truth here though. And even if it's important stuff, right, like there'll be important stuff that I need to know the details on. And ladies would have been like, I need to know all this info, right. Whereas as men we're just like, you know like my friend got into a car wreck and then that's all I know, they're in a wreck. Are they okay? Not sure. They just know they're in a wreck. You know like it's, you don't know any information. Like did they go to the hospital? Have no idea. They texted me so I guess they're alive, right. That's as much as I know, okay. But when it comes to details and wanting to know the skinny on everything. I believe in a lot of cases women are in this category a lot of times. But that does not exempt the men, okay. Let me be very clear. Men can be busybodies as well. Men can be tattlers. Men can be tail bearers. And so I just, just to be honest with you, I'm just going to put it on the level right here. When a man is a busybody, it's kind of a woman trait. Just to be honest, it's kind of like a feminine thing. When a guy is like a busybody, I'm just kind of like, where's your purse? You know, like where, you know, not that purses are wrong, obviously for women, you know. And this isn't for you, Richie. I wasn't, I didn't mean that towards you. You're satchels. So, I know purses in the Bible, okay. I know that that term's in there. This is 2023 purses I'm talking about. First Timothy chapter 5 verse 11, it says, Younger widows refuse, for when they have begun to wax wanton against Christ, they will marry, having damnation because they have cast off their first faith. What this is talking about is that if you're going to be counted as a widow within the church, then you're to be a widow for the rest of your life. That's what it's dealing with. That's why if you're younger than 60, you're supposed to just get remarried. You know, that's what it's basically saying. But if you basically are, you're basically taking this kind of office of a widow in the church, you're getting everything paid for and you're doing this in the church and then you go marry after that, that's what shouldn't be happening. You should've just got remarried to begin with and not cost the church money to basically take care of you. That's what it's dealing with here. So, it says in verse 13, And withal, they learned to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and not only idle, but tattlers also in busybodies, speaking things which they ought not. So, idleness is kind of like what led up to the tattling, right? It's kind of like, oh, I don't have much to do, therefore I'm bored and I need to know what's going on around me, right? This is where reality shows, this is why I think reality shows became a big thing. Back in like the 90s and 2000s. Are they still a thing? Are they still like reality shows out there? Anyway, where it's kind of like this big, you know, just drama of conflict and tension, right? Most of it's made up, by the way, just so you know. It's all scripted anyway. But, to be honest, I just never, that stuff always just made me feel uneasy. It just made me feel gross. I don't know how to really explain it. If you ever watch a show and you're just like, I just feel gross after watching this. I don't feel good about myself. It's not like when you watch Walker, Texas Ranger, and you feel fantastic afterwards, you know. As soon as that guy gets the roundhouse kick to the face, everything's right in the world. But reality shows, it's all about this drama, tension, people are mad at each other, there's all this stuff on there, but people eat it up fork and spoon. Just case in point that those things, that those shows are a big hit, is showing you that, hey, that must be something that people like, okay. They like knowing what's going on. They like knowing what's going on in someone else's house. And here's the thing, I think a lot of cases when it comes to this, they like looking at it because it's exciting, drama's exciting, but also I do think that a lot of people look at that stuff and they're like, I don't feel that bad about how things are going on in my house now. They look for these worst case scenarios like this person over here. It's like, yeah, I mean if you went over and saw, and this guy's like beating his wife, you're like, look honey, you gotta do it. It's like, really, that's your standard? You're not getting beat? You know, that's why you should be looking at it like, yeah, I'm doing good. What you have to understand is that we should not be comparing ourselves among ourselves. And when people tail-bear and they tattle on people, a lot of this is like, this is what this person's doing, this is what this person's doing, I'm doing this. And therefore, I'm doing better, I'm doing this, you know, whatever, okay. So, busybodies, and go to 2 Thessalonians 3 and verse 10. Now, as you're going there, I meant to read verse 14 there. It says, I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully, for some are already turned aside after Satan. What this is dealing with is the fact that, how do you deal with that idleness? Well, if you have a bunch of children, and then you basically have to deal with all the duties of that, and you're guiding the house, it's harder to be idle, okay. You say, well, you know, but I know people that have children and they still are busybodies, then they're not accomplishing what they should be. They're not doing their duties as a wife, then. There's no way that you can spend that much time busybodying in other men's matters, and still get everything else that you need to get done. And men, I mean, if you're working full-time jobs, and then you're doing all this work, and then you still have time to do all this stuff, something's missing. Something's getting left off. You're like, well, I'm still getting, you know, I'm doing my job or whatever. Well, is your reading going good? Is your memorizing going good? Is this going good? So I think idleness is a big problem with that. In 2 Thessalonians chapter 3 and verse 11, it says, For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat. For we hear that there are some which walk among you disorderly, working not at all, but are busybodies. Notice how, being a busybody and not working, being a busybody and being idle go hand in hand. Go to 1 Peter chapter 4. I forgot, I didn't get the, there was a verse I was going to read to you where it says, Proverbs 25, 23, it says, The north wind driveth away reigns, so does an angry countenance, a back biting tongue. If someone's spreading news about somebody, you should ask, why are you stating this to me? Why are you telling me this information? Don't get me wrong, it's not like you can't talk about like, hey, so and so bought a new vehicle. Okay, does that change the cost to you in China? You know, like, so and so bought a new vehicle, and you just left it at that? Okay. So and so bought a new vehicle, do you know how much they paid for that? See a difference? There is, there is, there is a difference on what information you're giving and why you're giving it and what you're doing with that information. And this is something that can definitely be a problem, and you know what, I want, if there's stuff going on, and I've heard of stuff going on in our church, dealing with paddling, dealing with tail bearing, and I want it to be nipped in the bud. I don't want people talking about what other, what people are doing in their marriages or not doing in their marriages. You know, what's going on? Listen, if it's, if it's an offense that's 1 Corinthians 5, then yes, bring it to my attention, but if it's not, mind your own business. And so, 1 Peter 4 and verse 14, it says, If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy are ye, for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you. On their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified. But let none of you suffer as a murderer, or as a thief, or as an evildoer, or as a busy body in other men's matters. Yet if any man suffer as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God on this behalf. Busy bodies in other men's matters. Listen, you know, we're considered a new IAB church, and one of the main gripes with new IAB is people being busybodies in other men's matters, and that is something that does happen online, no question about it. Let that not be the case in our church. Whether it's outside the church, dealing with matters that don't belong to us, or whether it's matters in the church that don't belong to you particularly. If the person comes to you, sure, someone could come to you and want your advice. I'm not saying that they can't talk, no one can talk to each other about anything, that's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is they talk to you about something, and then you take that and talk to someone else about it. That's what shouldn't be happening. That is called tail bearing. Or wanting that information, right? Seeking that out, right? You guys know what's going on over here with this family over here, or this family over here? Do you know what they're doing? You know that whispering that goes back and forth, and then you know what that turns into? Well, does pastor know about this? Does pastor know about this? Pastor's not doing anything about this. And what a lot of people don't realize is that, guess what, pastor's actually talking to those people more than you ever did. And that there's been counsel that's been given, there's been things that have been talked about, more than you know. And maybe there's information you don't know. So, that being said, it's something that, tail bearing's not the answer, okay? And let's say someone says, hey, I don't want to go to pastor with this, I just want to go to this person over here, fine. You don't have to come to me. I don't need to be the person that knows about it. You know, as far as, I got a problem with something, I need to deal with this, I'm going to go to this person. That's fine. But I'll say this, everybody should be aware of who you ask counsel from, okay? I know from personal experience of people that won't come to me for counsel because they know what my answer will be. I had a co-worker one time that was getting a divorce. And the person asked, he was coming to me, he was going to a counselor, he was going to a psychiatrist, and the psychiatrist told him, hey, you know, this is not your fault, this is all her fault, you're doing everything right, and yeah, you should get a divorce. And you know what I said, you should work it out. And divorce is not an option. You know what, never ask me again, my advice. Just like kids, they know which parent to go to that's going to give them the right answer. So this is something that just needs to be in the back of your mind, okay? Not saying to not help people out, not saying not have compassion on people in the church that are dealing with issues. What you have to know, though, is when that information is spread around by word of mouth through many different people, it only hurts. It's only a wound, it doesn't help. It only makes things worse, it only makes reconciliation that much harder. And it can ultimately get into messing with the authority as well, too. Unintentionally, I think, in a lot of cases, meaning that that's not what they're trying to do, but in the end, if there's a matter that everybody's talking about and it's not getting dealt with, you know what that means is that the leadership's not dealing with it, okay? And listen, if you think the leadership's not dealing with it, you know who you come to? The leadership. Talk to me. Talk to brother Dave. And if you don't like the answer that we give, I'm sorry, you know? My kids don't like the answer they get sometimes. But it's just the way it is. Until you give me chapter and verse, I'm not changing. There must be chapter and verse for you to change my mind on how I do something. And if there's not a chapter and verse, then you're just going to have to deal with it. Because this is our final authority, but if it's not in there, then what do you got? So go to Proverbs chapter 19. Actually, go to Matthew chapter 20. I'm going to read Proverbs 19. Proverbs 19, 14. You're going to Matthew 20. Proverbs 19, 14 says, House and riches are the inheritance of fathers, and a prudent wife is from the Lord. Slothfulness casteth into a deep sleep, and an idle soul shall suffer hunger. There's a lot in the Bible, and especially in Proverbs, dealing with sluggards, slothful, dealing with idleness and all this. And obviously, it gets into the fact that if you don't work, neither should you eat. That's definitely true. But this story that Jesus gives here, it's a parable, essentially. But, you know, it could very well be an actual story that he's using as an illustration. But in Matthew chapter 20 and verse 1, the question is, how do you fix idleness? How do you fix it? It's actually a very simple, simple answer here. Go to work, you know? Do work. You're like, oh, you know, I have too much time. I'm getting into, like, things I shouldn't get into. Fill it in with work. Do more work. And what does it say? Matthew 20 and verse 1 says, For the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man that is an householder, which went out early in the morning to hire laborers into the vineyard. And when he had agreed with the laborers for a penny a day, he sent them into his vineyard. And he went out about the third hour and saw others standing idle in the marketplace. So get this, he sends people out beginning of the day. He goes out again. He goes out the third hour of the day. And there's people that are just standing around not doing anything. He said unto them, Go ye also into the vineyard, and whatsoever is right I will give you. And they went their way. Again, he went out about the sixth and ninth hour and did likewise. And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing idle and said unto them, Why stand ye here all the day idle? They said unto him, Because no man hath hired us, he said unto them, Go ye also into the vineyard, and whatsoever is right that shall ye receive. So the idea here is that how do you stop from being idle? Get to work. You're like, well, no one's hired me. There's always work to be done for the kingdom of God. And so this is something that is going to guard you from that. Go to First Thessalonians chapter four. First Thessalonians chapter four and verse nine. First Thessalonians chapter four and verse nine. I mean, besides the harm that being a busybody and a tattler and a tailor bearer is, the harm that it does to other people, it's just a waste of time. It's a waste of time. You're not getting what you should be getting done. And you know the Bible talks about redeeming the time because the days are evil. There's almost so much time in a day. And that's something that I will deal with. I'll say this, I'll deal with problems I have to deal with. Whether it's at work, whether it's with my family, or whether it's at church. Things I have to deal with. I don't search out things to deal with. Meaning if you come to me with a problem, I'll deal with it. I'm your pastor, right? Whether I like it or not. Listen, there's a lot of cases I don't like it, I don't want to deal with it, but it has to be done. It has to be dealt with, right? And it sucks. But I don't search that out. I don't like contention. I don't like fighting. I like peace. I like unity. I'm not that pastor that likes to fight. I will fight if I have to. I'm the kind of pastor that if you put me up against the wall, then you better watch out. Meaning like, I will fight if I have to. But I'm not going out looking for it. When it comes to tattling and tail bearing, you're basically going by and just kind of jumping into things that don't belong to you. You're looking for a fight. You're looking for contention. You're looking for strife. Some of it's just from being bored. Being idle. Whatever the case may be. What you have to understand is that there are people that are getting hurt by it. And there is something that's detrimental to it. In 1 Thessalonians 4 and verse 9 it says, Here's how you deal with idleness. Here's how you don't be a busy body. Here's how you don't be a tail bearer. Notice in verse 9 it says, But as touching brotherly love ye need not that I write unto you. For ye yourselves are taught of God to love one another. And indeed ye do it toward all the brethren which are in all Macedonia. But I beseech you brethren that ye increase more and more. And that ye study to be quiet and to do your own business and work with your own hands as we commanded you. That ye may walk honestly toward them that are without and that ye may have lack of nothing. You know what the Bible is commanding here? Just be quiet and do your own business. That's what we all should be doing. That should be the general rule. If you think about how should I go about when it comes to my life? Be quiet and do your own business. Do your own work. You go to work. You do what you need to do. You go and you're with your family. You're dealing with your family problems. That's it. It's pretty simple isn't it? Now the Bible does say to bear one another's burdens. But you need to do that with meekness and compassion. And of some having compassion making a difference. Listen, I'm going to be preaching, actually my sermon this afternoon is going to be on love. It's going to be on charity. So I don't want to like steal my thunder from that sermon. But the idea is that everything that should be done, whether it's discipline or whatever it is, needs to be done with charity and needs to be done with love. You say well kicking someone out of church, that's not loving. Yes it is. It's loving for the people in the church and it's loving for that person because they need to get it right. You know what's not loving? Enabling people. Like a lot of the governments that are basically handing out needles for drug users. They're like oh we love them. We don't want them to overdose. We don't want them to get infection. Yeah enabling them is the answer. Yeah that's right. No. Tough love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend. So yes you need to have some cases where it doesn't feel nice. Listen, my children will testify that spanking doesn't feel nice. But it's not because I don't love them. It should be out of love. And can discipline be without love? Yes it can. And that's where you toe the line between love and abuse or discipline and abuse. And we should all know and we should all be dealing with that in our own families. And knowing hey I'm disciplining them out of love. This is where this is at. And it's not in the realm of anger and abuse when it comes to that. So go to 2 Corinthians chapter 10. Actually go to John chapter 21. I'm going to read 2 Corinthians 10 verse 12. It says for we dare not make ourselves of the number or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves. But they measuring themselves by themselves and comparing themselves among themselves are not wise. I want you to know something that every child is different. Every family is different. Does that mean that some families have to spank and some don't? No. You know, he that spares the rod hates the son. I mean that's just straight up what the Bible teaches, right? But children are different. And when it comes to how children act, you can't look at your children and say, Well my child, my children, they act this way and why don't theirs? I believe wholeheartedly that God gave me my first two children that were really hard at the beginning on purpose. Knowing that I'm a pastor. That if my children were really easy, if I had James as the first child, it would have been easy for me to be like, What are you guys doing? What are you even doing? Just judging everybody and how they're raising their children. Why can't they be like my son over here, right? I'm not saying James is perfect, but he does get the coat of men in color. No, I'm just kidding. No, but there are differences in children, right? But guess what? I love my children, each one just the same. They're all different. They all have different personalities. They all have strengths. They all have weaknesses. And all your children are different from each other. And you can't expect everybody to just be lock and step like you are. That's why it's not wise to compare yourselves among yourselves. And by the way, it says judge nothing before the time. There's a lot of things where you're going to be like, That person doesn't dress right. That person doesn't watch the right things. That person does things that I wouldn't do. And you know what? The proof will be in the pudding. I've seen a lot. I've seen people that were so strict on standards that you're like, Well, I mean, their kids are going to come out straight laced and their family is in shambles. Because they took it too far. And so that's why we shouldn't be judging. Be like, well, you know, I'm doing it this hard core. I, you know, listen, I've had families that were in church that came to church and then leave church because I wasn't strict enough. My standards weren't tight enough. Like the way I did things and the stance I took wasn't strong enough. On like how, you know, what my children watch or what they don't watch or whatever. And I've had people like hold people to these standards and then talk behind people's back, go to other people. You know, I've had people go to other pastor's wives to talk about how they thought that what I was doing or allowing my wife to do was not biblical and that it was sin. When there's no chapter and verse on it. It's just like chapter and verse, chapter and verse. And if they'll, listen, if people will do that to the pastor, they'll do it to anybody. And so we're all susceptible to that. Bottom line. Every single one of us can get into being someone that's a busybody, a tailbearer, a tattler, could want to know like the skinny on everything that's going on. But know this, when knowledge increases, so does sorrow. The more you know about what people are going through, the more you wish you didn't know. I'm not saying that to like scare you, like we got a bunch of like infiltrators in our church. No, it's just that people have problems. People go through a lot of things that aren't pretty. And if someone wants help from me, I'll bear it. Tell me your problems, right? But I don't want to if I don't have to. You're like, you're weak. Listen, I got my own problems. I don't know if you know this, but I'm a man too. I'm just like you. I am a Christian just like you. And if you take the weight of everybody's problems onto you, that hurts. And so as much as I do believe it's compassionate for people to want to do that, here's what's not compassionate. If you come to me with a problem and then I go tell everybody else about it. You're like, you know what someone told me in my office the other day? And I'm just like, blah, there it is. That's not being compassionate to that person. And so that being said, I think that this is something that we need to know. And Jesus says to Peter, when Peter is basically asking about John, the disciple whom Jesus loved, and said, what shall this man do? And Jesus said, what if I will that he tarry till I come, what is that to thee fall without me? It's not wrong to want people to go on the right track and to try to help people out. But I'll state this, you know, and I've said it before, unsought advice is rarely heeded. So when you start trying to put your advice out there and you start trying to tell people this is the way it should be done, this is the way I would do it, most of the time people aren't going to listen to that. Most of the time they'll be like, I don't really care what you think. That's just facts. Even if you're trying to be nice, even if you're trying to help someone out. So wait for someone to come to you and ask you. And if they ask you about something that doesn't deal with them directly, then you should just reject it out of hand and be like, why are you even talking to me about this? I'm not going to give you advice about someone else's problems that you're telling me about. Why would I give you the advice that that person needs? Go to the source. So ultimately, you know, we want unity and tail bearing and all that, that just sows discord. That is only going to hurt the cause, that's only going to hurt the people that are involved. Like I said, if you think that there's a crime involved, obviously bring that to attention. You know how people will spin and be like, oh, pastor, you know, he's just going to let everything go on underneath the, he's just like those Catholic priests, you know, they're just going to do all this stuff and not say anything about it. Apples and oranges, my friends, if it's not a crime and if it's not something that's explicitly stated in the Bible as needing church discipline, then let it go, let it go. And this is something that I preached on years ago and this will be something that we'll need to deal with in the future, guaranteed. This is just the nature of the business. I mean, this is the nature of being around a lot of people and being with a bunch of families, that this is something that needs to go on. And I just want you to know that when you start judging other families, that hurts that, they hear about that, that hurts their feelings. I don't know if you know this, but people will hear things that's said about them and then they may never come back because they're just like, well, how many people think this about me? I didn't know this is what people thought about me. That stuff comes around and listen, as the Bible said, you know, like talking about like not speaking about the prince in your bedchamber because a bird will take it off somewhere, I'm paraphrasing that, but it's basically stating that it will get out and they will hear it. And we need to be thinking about everybody involved, not just the one person involved or that you would be talking to or whatever, you need to think about everybody. And so, I know this is a longer sermon, thanks for doing the telephone game with the kids, it's been a long time since I've seen that one. But yeah, anyway, this is something that I don't see as a huge problem right now, but I want to nip it in the bud. And if anybody hears like, oh, so-and-so said this, well, who did you hear that from? Well, I heard it from so-and-so, who heard it from so-and-so, who heard it from so-and-so? Listen, unless it's the person talking about their own problems to you, they should just nip it in the bud and be like, well, let me hear it from them. Okay, so let's end with a word prayer. Heavenly Father, we thank you today, thank you for your word. Pray to be with us as we go out soul-winding today. And Lord, I pray to be with our church and help us, Lord, to be in unity, but also just to have compassion one for another, to love one another. And Lord, and just staying out of strife, staying out of contentions. But Lord, I do pray that obviously our church and many families are dealing with, in some cases, even major problems. And Lord, we just pray that you would be with them. And Lord, help us to help them in those situations in any way that we can. And Lord, we just pray for reconciliation in all these cases. And Lord, just pray that you would help me to lead as your pastor. And Lord, help us to be in unity as much as we can, and for the furtherance of the gospel. Lord, we love you, and pray to be with us at the next point in time, in Jesus Christ's name. Amen. Amen. So by the day, we'll come and sing one more song, and then we'll be dismissed. All right. Take your songbooks and turn to song 195. Song 195. And your songbooks will sing, I Will Sing of the Mercies. And if you would stand, we'll sing song 195. I will sing of the mercies of the Lord forever, I will sing, I will sing, I will sing of the mercies of the Lord forever, I will sing of the mercies of the Lord. With my mouth will I make known Thy faithfulness, Thy faithfulness. With my mouth will I make known Thy faithfulness.