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Amen, alright, so keep your place there in Song of Solomon 3, we'll get back to it. So it's Valentine's Day of course, Happy Valentine's Day to everybody. Hopefully that was not a surprise to anyone that it is Valentine's Day today. So we are going to talk a little bit about Valentine's Day this morning. Is Valentine's Day, you know, first of all I want to talk about just the origins of it. You know, is Valentine's Day a fake holiday? You know I've made that joke many times throughout the years that it's a fake holiday made up just so men can be in trouble. But you know, what is Valentine's Day all about? Let's talk about where it comes from, see if it's biblical or not, and see what we can do with it as Bible believing Christians. So first of all, Valentine's Day itself, you know the origins of it are this, I'll just read you a snippet from an article here, you know, not the Bible, but this article says As although there were several Christian martyrs named Valentine, the day may have taken its name from a priest who was martyred about 270, the year 270 by the emperor Claudius Gothicus. According to the legend, the priest signed a letter from your Valentine to his jailer's daughter whom he had befriended and by some accounts, healed from blindness. Other accounts hold that it was Saint Valentine of Terni, a bishop for whom the holiday was named, though it is possible the two saints were actually one person. Another common legend states that a Saint Valentine defied the emperor's orders and secretly married couples to spare the husbands from war. It is for this reason that his feast day is associated with love. So the day is obviously popular in the United States as well as Britain, Canada, Australia, and is celebrated in other countries, including Argentina, France, Mexico, South Korea. In the Philippines, it is the most common wedding anniversary. People get married on Valentine's Day and mass weddings of hundreds of couples are not uncommon on Valentine's Day. So look, the holiday was expanded to expressions of affection among relatives and friends. Many children exchange Valentine's Day with their friends, typically on February 14th as well. So what are we to think of this idea of Valentine's Day? What does the Bible say about it? First of all, there are bad things about it. There are bad things about Valentine's Day. There are some ties to paganism with Valentine's Day. If you've ever seen the little naked baby with the bow and arrow cupid is actually a pagan god. It's a Roman god. So that's not good. There's some thought that it's got ties to Roman Catholicism. The Roman Catholic Church recognizes Saint Valentine, even though the Roman Catholic Church wasn't really official even around that time. They claim Saint Valentine as a saint of the church. Now I hate, nobody really knows whether it's like one saint, two saints, nobody really knows anything about Saint Valentine, who this guy was, even though the Catholics call him Saint Valentine and claim him as a saint of the church. We know that any saved believer is a saint. We know this. That's what the Bible teaches. So the Catholic Church claiming him, I mean, we can't really defame the guy because of that. I mean, they claim Peter too. So they claim Peter as the first pope. So it's debatable whether he, no one knows what his doctrine was, so I don't think we should put that on him. He was martyred, apparently, or they were martyred, both of them, whatever. So I mean, we can't really claim it's a Catholic holiday. It's more of a cultural thing, but if we're actually worshiping a saint, that's obviously not something that we should do. That would be a bad thing as well. Now the good things about it could be just the celebration of relationships between spouses. It could be a great time to just, you know, recognize your spouse, as I just read. It could be a great time to recognize your friendships in your life. Turn to Romans chapter 14. So what to do? Is it good or bad? Right? Is it, I mean, it's an industry created in trapped men, but that's just industry that did that, okay? That's not, I'm just joking. But what are we to do? Is it good or is it bad? We see that there's good things, there's bad things, you know, it could be taken for good. How are we to look at Valentine's Day? Look at Romans chapter 14 and verse number five. Romans chapter 14 and verse number five. The Bible says, one man esteemeth one day above another. Another esteemeth every day alike. Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind. He that regardeth the day, so here's a guy that recognizes a day. So basically the Bible here is saying that, you know, maybe one person esteems a day as a holy day and maybe another person doesn't esteem that day. We have two saved people and one person esteems it and the other person doesn't. So what do we do? Look at verse six. He that regardeth the day, okay, the person that does recognize that day regardeth it unto the Lord and he that regardeth it not to the Lord doth not regard it. So as long as you're doing it for the right reasons, the Bible is saying, look, as long as you're regarding the day unto the Lord, it's fine. As long as you're using it for a way to glorify God and the things of God, there's nothing wrong with it. Now if somebody wants to not regard the day, you know, maybe it's because he has something in his conscience or something that he's saying, okay, that he's not regarding it because of the Lord. He's like, that's both fine. He that eateth, eateth to the Lord, for he giveth God thanks and he that eateth not to the Lord, he eateth not and giveth God thanks. So of course this, you know, this debate kind of in this, this philosophy came from this idea of the Jews and the Gentiles kind of coming together both as saved people and certain people ate certain things of the Gentiles that the Jews thought were unclean. Of course, Peter had a problem with this and God corrected him. But I mean, the whole idea is that you eat something not and it's unto the Lord because you're not eating it. That's fine. And if you do eat something, you know, and you regard, you give God thanks for it. It's fine. Same thing with days. Same philosophy here. So while we should stay away from all these ungodly references, this paganism and things like that, or, you know, worship of saints, which is, you know, ridiculous on its face to everyone here. If you want to regard February 14th as a day to celebrate Godly relationships in your life, there's nothing at all wrong with that. So I mean, you know, more power to you. So let's look at, you know, regarding our relationships in our lives, especially our spouses this morning. Let's use this day unto the Lord and look at what the Bible has to say for us. So I mean, first of all, you know, go back to Song of Solomon chapter three. You shouldn't need a special day to do all these things that we're going to talk about this morning. You shouldn't need, you know, a special day to do the things that we're going to step through in Song of Solomon this morning with, you know, with and for your spouse. You shouldn't need a special day for that. You know, it shouldn't be like, okay, you're this horrible human being and you don't have a good relationship, but on February 14th, you're just going to get it all right. So I mean that, you know, that should not be your philosophy. But Song of Solomon is an interesting book because it shows how a relationship could be between a man and his wife. So this is really writing about King Solomon and I believe his first wife, Pharaoh's daughter is who I believe that this is talking about. And it makes sense that it would be his first wife and I'll show you that a little bit later. But basically this is talking about this first wife, this marriage that Solomon had and you can see that at the beginning it was very good. You know, Song of Solomon has very strong language. As a matter of fact, whenever, you know, you write Song of Solomon, you know, someone's going to have to read Song of Solomon and they're like, oh, you know, they got to read this. You know, it's very, you know, passionate language talking about, you know, when she's talking about her husband and when he's talking about her. It's basically a letter between a man and his wife and several different encounters they have with each other and it's talking about King Solomon. So look down at verse number three. Let's talk about appreciating your spouse this morning and not taking them for granted. Look at Song of Solomon chapter three and look at verse number one. The Bible says, so here we see, you know, his wife, Pharaoh's daughter, talking about Solomon in Song of Solomon chapter three and the Bible says, by night on my bed I sought him whom my soul loveth. I sought him but I found him not. I will rise now and go about in the city streets and in the broad ways I will seek him whom my soul loveth. I sought him but I found him not. The watchmen that go about the city found me to whom I said, saw ye him whom my soul loveth. So here we have in verses one through three we have this woman, this wife, she's frantically searching the city for her husband and she's got very strong language that she's looking at. She's frantically searching to the point where the watchmen, the guards of the city come to her and they're like, you know, what's wrong? You know, what's going on? And she's like, I'm looking for my husband. Her soul is vexed because she cannot find him. She misses him. And then in verse number four the Bible says that she finds him. In verse number four the Bible says it was but a little that I passed from them but I found him whom my soul loveth. I held him and would not let him go until I brought him into my mother's house and into the chamber of her that conceived me. So she finds him and she embraces him and she finds the one that she was looking for so passionately. So the first point this morning about your spouse, men and women is that you should always be seeking each other. You should always be seeking your spouse. You say, well, I have my spouse. What are you talking about? I've already found her. No, you should always be seeking your spouse. Song of Solomon is a conversation between a man and his spouse. I believe, like I said, Solomon and his first wife. But did you know that Song of Solomon is also used as a parallel between God's relationship with his spouse, us? So it can also be paralleled with how God feels about us. It's basically, it's a love letter if you just want to look at it on its face like that. And the language in it is so strong, I mean, it's so strong that you can see how these people feel, this husband and wife feel about each other and look, it's how God feels about us as well. So the first point is that you should be seeking your spouse. It's a good example of what a marriage is supposed to be, so we should watch these signs. So she's frantically seeking her husband. So we should never get so used to each other, no matter how long we're married, that we stop seeking one another. God is never going to stop seeking us. We should never stop seeking God. We should always be pushing forward in our spiritual life, seeking the Lord, and we should always be doing the same with our spouse. You should never get so used to your spouse and think, you know what, I found her, we got married, now I don't have to seek her anymore. Now I don't have to seek her anymore. Because you will end up taking that for granted. Look at verse number four again. She finds him. She's seeking him and then she finds him. The second point is this, look at what she does when she finds him. The Bible says, I held him and would not let him go. So the second thing is, is that when you find your spouse, you know, you should appreciate what you find. Look, men, men should appreciate their wives. You should never stop seeking your wife and you should never stop appreciating your wife. Turn to Proverbs chapter 31, I'll read for you Proverbs chapter 12 and verse number four. Here's what the Bible says. Look, if you have a wife that is spiritual and is in church and she's reading the Bible and she's following the Lord and she's loving the Lord in her life, here's what the Bible says you have in Proverbs chapter 12 and verse number four. The Bible says, a virtuous woman is a crown to her husband, but she that maketh ashamed is rottenness in his bones. So the Bible says that if you are married to a virtuous woman, that is like a crown to you. That's a very valuable thing. The Bible says in Proverbs 31 verse 28 that men should do a certain thing. Look at verse 28 of Proverbs 31, here we're talking about the virtuous woman. Her children rise up and call her blessed, her husband also and he praiseth her. Look at verse 30, favor is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. And back in verse number 10, it says, who can find a virtuous woman for her price is far above rubies. So look, you have, if you're married to a virtuous woman, the Bible says you have something that is very valuable, that is very valuable. And look, here's an important thing for the men in the room. There's a difference between men's roles and women's roles. If you are going to listen to what the Bible is saying and run your family in a biblical way and the man is going to go out and support his family and the woman is going to stay home and raise the children and be a keeper at home because that's what the Bible's model is. No matter what the world says it is, that's what the Bible model is. If you want to raise biblical, spiritual children, this is how you will do it. They will have a mother at home that raises them in the fear and admonition of the Lord. Now, here's the thing, here's the difference though. Men, as they go on their life and their roles, they're going to have all kinds of praise from all kinds of different sources. If a man is doing what he's supposed to be doing and he's a hardworking man and he's supporting his family and he's active in his church and he's a leader in his church and he's being a blessing to his church and he's serving the Lord with his life, men, they're going to get a lot of praise from different places, whether that be, you know, their co-workers, whether that be their brothers and sisters in Christ, whether that be, you know, their spiritual leaders. Men typically are in this role where they're going to get, you know, recognized for things. You know, they might, at your job, you might get, you know, an attaboy at your job from your boss. You might get a promotion. You might get a raise. I mean, men, in their roles, if they're doing their roles correctly, people will literally give them more money. They'll be like, you're doing so well, here's more money. I mean, that's appreciation. They may get, you know, bonuses. You may become the boss. I mean, there's all these things in the world that will recognize a man that is doing what he's supposed to do. However, the world treats the virtuous woman differently. The world treats the virtuous woman, the world does not, the world we live in today does not value the virtuous woman as the Bible says that she should be valued. The Bible does not, not the Bible, the world itself, the world we live in, the culture that we live in, it does not value the mom that stays home and raises her children. It tells that mom you should go out and be like the man. That's what the world teaches. So they're in this role and they're unappreciated by the world. And that world may be very close to them. It may be their family. It may be their friends that, you know, friends, but they are going to be, look, they are going to take shots for their role. They're not going to get praised for their role. So men, that is your job. That is your job to praise your wife. It is your job to defend her from these attacks of the world and, you know, family members even that may say, why are you doing that? Shouldn't you be, you know, doing, you know, making them, trying to degrade that role. But that praise and that defense needs to come from you. That's what the Bible is talking about in Proverbs chapter 31. I mean, look, folks, we're watching the fall of civilization. I don't know if you know that. We are watching the fall of civilization. When we start taking, you know, mothers, the important, you know, the heart of the family unit and we start taking that and degrading that and downplaying that and telling these mothers that that's not what they should be doing is raising the next generation. We are trying to, I mean, we are literally trying to destroy the fabric of society at that point. And we're watching it happen. Look, it's not happening here. It's not happening here, but we're watching it happen in the world. And don't you let that get through to your wife. You be strong and you praise her. That means that that, you know, look, I don't do this enough. I know it's something that I need to work on as well. But look, as they are not given all that credit that you're given for, you know, in all the world around you, you know, recognize that that needs to come from you. All these moral things, I mean, the fabric of the family is frowned upon today. A woman, a mother raising her children. The wife, the wife that honors her husband is frowned upon today. All these things are backwards now. The virtuous things, the virtuous things of the virtuous woman are not valued by the world that we live in. They're not valued by the culture that we're in. But look, that doesn't mean, just because the world doesn't value them, just because the world says, oh yeah, you know, it doesn't mean they're not still rubies. They're still rubies. Just because people don't recognize that they're rubies anymore doesn't mean that the Bible's not true. They're still rubies. They're still, you know, it's still a crown, man. It is still your crown. Look, nobody values virtue anymore, but it's still valuable. Your wife is still rubies because of who she is, because of what she can do, because of the effect that if she is the virtuous woman and strives to be the virtuous woman, the kind of effect that will have on the future generations of your family, that it's not even rubies, folks. It's far above rubies. It's far above rubies. Because of your crown, you know what that's saying, is she's a crown to you. You know, the crown, and what's the opposite of that? She can either be a crown if she's a virtuous woman, or she can be rottenness in your bones. Basically what the Bible is saying there in Proverbs chapter 12, it's saying that a virtuous woman is a tremendous joy to a man. To be married to a virtuous woman is a tremendously joyful thing. Maybe the most joyful thing in a man's physical life on this earth. Maybe. Definitely it's in the top two, for sure. But look, and look, single people, it's something that you should be striving for. You should be striving to be that virtuous woman. Men should be striving to find that virtuous woman. Turn to Song of Solomon chapter seven. So look, we should be appreciating each other. We should be appreciating our spouse. Appreciate, seek your spouse, and when you find her or him, appreciate what you have. And men, this appreciation for your wife, this needs to be expressed outwardly towards her. You can say, and here's a problem that men will have. You can say, you know, well, you know, this is a problem, like, you know, the definition of love is all wrong too. Appreciation, just like love is action. So you say, well I do appreciate my wife. In my mind, I appreciate her all the time. No, you must show that appreciation. You must actually do something so she knows that you appreciate her. When you praise at her, it's not like you're saying, oh, in your mind, oh, that's great, I'm so happy. And you never ever say anything to her, you never ever do anything for her. You know, there's never any action associated with that praise. Turn to Song of Solomon chapter seven. The women are like, yes, preach it. Song of Solomon chapter seven, look at verse number 10. Here's the next point I want to get across. I am my beloveds and his desire is towards me. So this is a pretty simple one as well, but here's the thing. Your desire should be towards each other. Your desire should be, once you have, you know, one, you should not have desire towards others. Once you're married. Solomon, I mean, Solomon, the man that this book is about, he messed this up in his life. He messed up this marriage. Look what he had here. Just read Song of Solomon and just look what he had. Look at this crown that he had and he messed it up. I can't even imagine a healthier marriage than when you read Song of Solomon. I mean, you can't, that's why it's in the Bible, because it's like, here's a perfect marriage right here. But Solomon messed it up, because, look, I feel sorry for this woman here, because this was a great time and this did not last. Because that desire for each other, that desire for only his wife, you know, as she watched her husband marry hundreds of wives, that, you know, that showed that he did not only have desire for her. He had desire for other women, you know, of, you know, his desire for her left. Don't ever let your desire for each other leave. You must prefer one another. Men, be careful where your desire is going. It should be towards your wife. And if you allow sin to come into your life and you are looking at and doing things that you should not be, look, your desire will leave your wife. It happened to Solomon, his desire left his wife. And then you will no longer have this type of relationship in Song of Solomon. Look, it's not a guarantee that you will just have this never-ending desire for each other. Women, same for you. You should desire your husband. I mean, a relationship like this needs to be maintained. There needs to be effort and action that goes into maintaining this. You know, look, you need to prefer one another. You need to make time for one another. You know, families, we have a lot of families in here with small children. Look, it's hard to make time for one another when you have small children, but you must do it. You must make time for one another because, look, I mean, after the kids are grown up, you'll have more time, you know, to be with one another, to prefer one another, to spend that time together. You know, our kids have grown up and, boy, we really hit a stride there where our kids got old enough where we could leave the house and not, you know, have to worry about them being home alone. And, I mean, that's a great time. But here's the thing. If you just ignore each other and you lose that desire for one another and that preference for one another during those years when the kids are small, if you don't keep that alive, you'll get to that point where you have more time and you won't have that desire to spend it with each other. I can't tell you how many times I've seen this. People that are, you know, their kids are grown, their kids are gone, they're retired, and they can just, they don't want to have anything to do with each other. That's a sad thing. They're missing out on this opportunity. But look, if that preference is not maintained, if that preference is not taken care of, it will go away. It can go, it can, you know, your preference can go into other things. You have to maintain that preference for one another. Look, a healthy, a healthy long marriage is a rare thing. If you think about it, think about how many people that you know that have been married for 30 years, 40 years, that just adore one another, that just prefer one another, that just can't get enough of one another. I mean, that's a rare thing. You know, there's a lot of people who stay married and will never get divorced, but that does not mean you're going to have a healthy marriage unless you take care of it. And look, it doesn't happen by accident, folks. So why don't people do it? You say, I want it because they take each other for granted, is what they do. They stop seeking each other, they stop appreciating each other, and they stop, you know, preferring each other. You know, she thinks he's always there. You know, he's always there, he's always going to be there. He's a good man, he knows that marriage is forever, he's never going anywhere. She's a good wife, she's never going anywhere, and they just take it completely for granted. That's all it takes to lose what is in Song of Solomon. So it doesn't mean, look, you can lose that joy that we see in Song of Solomon. Here's the last point I want to make, and this one's a little bit more specific. But notice the language, I want you to notice the language that is constantly being used in Song of Solomon. She's always talking about, you know, my love, my beloved, all these different, you know, terms of endearment that they're using for each other. And the last point I want to make is, as you get married, and this is very difficult to do, but as you're married and you're married for more than a year and you're married for maybe 10 years and then you're married for 20 years, don't get too casual with each other. Being casual is, I can't really think of a place where being casual or being too casual is a good thing, actually. So just remember that in your marriage to don't get too casual with each other. I mean, how do you, here's the thing, how do you address each other? Think about this as a husband and a wife. How do you address each other on a day-to-day basis? You know, that's a sermon series in itself, just getting too casual in our society. But look, did you know that how you speak to somebody matters? Did you know that the words that you use matter? And especially in your marriage, the words that you use matter in your marriage. Something that I learned years ago was that when I came home from work, when I came home from work, somebody, I don't know, I don't know if somebody told me this or I just figured it out. But it's totally true. When you come home from work, men, did you know that the first sentence that you speak will define the entire evening? Say you come home from work and you're not happy with the yard or you're not happy with, you know, what's going on, there's no dinner even being made, you're starving to death. And say you're just not happy with something, look, and you just come home and you're just like, ah, you know, when are we going to get this yard cleaned up? And that's your first sentence when you come home from work, the whole evening will be bad. The whole evening will be bad. I mean, because here's what she's thinking. Your wife is thinking, he's been away from me all day long. Maybe your wife even prefers you still, even though you speak to her like this. But imagine, she prefers you, she's seeking you. You come home and she's like, oh, here's my husband, blah, blah, blah, blah. I mean, ladies, look at the front of your bulletin. Look at Proverbs 16, 24, the verse of the week. The Bible says, pleasant words are as a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and health to the bones. Ladies, think of it this way. When your husband gets up early to go to work, when your husband is getting up at four o'clock in the morning, five o'clock in the morning, and he's getting ready to go to work and he's getting dressed, and you're just like, you roll over and you're like, argh, turn the light off. I mean, look, what you're saying, I mean, look, that is, that is, it's a terrible thing for him to hear. The Proverbs 16, 24, where it says pleasant words are as in honeycomb, or as in honeycomb, look, I can't tell you how valuable it is to me. When my wife says something nice to me in the morning before I go to work, it makes my entire day, and in the same way, when you come home from work and you say something nice to your wife and you show affection and appreciation to your wife, it will make her entire day. That's all she's waiting for, is that preference that you show her, that kindness, you're giving her that honeycomb, those pleasant words. Look, how you speak to each other matters, and you have to do these things on purpose. I mean, it's so true. When my wife says something nice to me, it is so valuable to me. It is so nice to me. Look, it will never get old. I will never get used to it. I'll never get used to it. The words you use with each other matter so much in your life. Go to 1 Peter chapter three and look at verse number five. First Peter chapter three and look at verse number five. Think about the words that come out of your mouth and do not get so casual with your spouse, even in everyday conversation, that you're treating them like a buddy or you're treating them like one of the people that you work with or something like that. Your spouse is on a higher level than some friend. Your spouse is on a higher level than somebody that's a coworker or somebody that you're just friendly with. This is your spouse. Look at the language. The next time you read Song of Solomon, just look at the way that they speak to each other in general. No matter what they are saying, just look at the language that they're using. Look at 1 Peter chapter three and verse number five. The Bible says, For after this manner in the old time, the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands. So it's interesting, first of all, that the Bible here says that when it's speaking about holy women and people that were faithful to God, women that were faithful to God, one of the first things it mentions is that they're in subjections to their husband, that they're respectful to their husbands. And then look what it says in verse six, Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord. Now look, my wife doesn't call me Lord. And I don't require that, and that would be weird. But the point is this, the overall point is that how you address each other is super important. When Sarah was talking to Abraham and she was calling him Lord, in this sense here, she was showing respect to him. Women, do you show respect to your husbands when you speak to them? Do you know that you can tell if someone has respect for you by just how they speak to you? Like in the first sentence? It's very easy and men are looking for that. Men are constantly looking for that. So look, the words you say with each other are extremely important. Don't get too casual with each other. Now look, Song of Solomon is a great example of the joy that a marriage can bring to your life. Look, I am so happy that I'm married. I'm so happy that I'm married to who I'm married to. My marriage brings me just, I can't tell you how much joy my marriage brings to me personally, to my life. Just what a good marriage will do for a family is a whole other thing. But just as far as a man and a woman, the joy you could give to each other in your lives. Why would you not do it? Who wants a miserable life? Who wants to have rottenness in their bones? Who wants to be in the corner of a house top? Who wants to be in the woods? Who wants to be running from a contentious woman? Who would even want to be a contentious woman? And a contentious woman is not a happy woman. But look, just because this marriage is forever, but just because the point of trying to get across this Valentine's Day is that just because it's forever doesn't mean it's going to be joyful. So step one, you have to have two people that know it's forever and that aren't going to quit and are going to get through the hard times and no matter what, we are going to stay married to each other. That's what the Bible says. But number two, why not make it a joyful thing? It doesn't happen on accident. That's why, as a matter of fact, it takes a lot of work. It takes a lot of effort in the right direction and it takes doing things that may not come natural to you. Because look, it's our nature to take things for granted. It's our nature to get used to things. She's always going to be there. He's always going to be there. It's our nature. You know that relationship that when you first meet someone and it's just that, oh, you just You know why it's like that? It's like that not because it's just like that at the beginning and then that goes away. No, that's not why it's like that. It's like that because you at that moment are not taking it for granted. You at that moment are appreciating it. You at that moment are realizing the joy that comes from appreciating what God's provided you. You can always appreciate that. But it's your flesh that will want to take things for granted and not appreciate things. And as you don't appreciate things, you're going to stop seeking one another. You're going to stop having those outward actions towards one another. You're going to stop speaking kindly to one another. Maybe you stop speaking at all to one another. You're going to stop making time for one another. Because it's easier, you know, your flesh just wants to, I just have to work and I just have to do this and I just have to do this. And there's just no time for each other. No, you must make time. You must stop other things. You must always make that time to prefer one another. It takes effort on the man's side, the husband's side, and, you know, the woman's side. It doesn't happen on accident. The relationship itself, just like anything else, folks, it needs to be maintained. You must seek one another. Must appreciate one another. You must have that desire. Look, this world, this world is full of thorns. And look, all these thorns may not necessarily be seemingly sinful. You know, maybe you just work too much. You're like, I'm just working hard to support my family and you just work all the time. Or you're just doing, you're doing what you think the Bible is saying, you know, I'm just, I'm hanging around with my brothers and sisters in Christ. I'm hanging around with my godly friends and you just never make time for your spouse. Look, it doesn't have to be these inherent sinful things. Anything can draw you away from preferring your wife or preferring your husband. So be careful. You must have, you know, that preference for one another, that desire for one another, or it can go away if it goes to other things. If those thorns wrap you up, those thorns of this world, it can go away. And then, you know, be formal with one another. I mean, you should have your kids be formal with you as well. Hey, hey, get me a sandwich. You know, look, your kids shouldn't speak to their mom or their dad like that. In the same manner also, a wife and a husband should speak to each other in a formal, respectful way. Look, folks, you're not guaranteed, as we were remembering, you know, our marriages and our relationships and our life on Valentine's Day, it should not just be Valentine's Day. It should be every day. And you're not, look, there's no guarantee, look, the Bible commands that you get married and you stay married. That's a commandment. But there is no guarantee for a healthy, happy marriage in the Bible if you don't do what you're supposed to do. That's why we have this book in the Bible. It takes doing things on purpose. And one thing that I really appreciate in my life, I really appreciate the mistakes of other people. You say, well, that seems kind of a strange thing to say. No, I appreciate the mistakes of other people. You'll find people that don't appreciate the mistakes of other people. You'll find people out there that are like, no, I insist on making all my own mistakes. Good for you. I appreciate the mistakes of other people. Whenever I see somebody fall flat on their face, whenever I see somebody destroy their whole life, I take note. I take note and I try to humble myself and say, you know what, if that happened to that guy, if that happened to David, that could happen to me. I mean, King David, if that, I mean, that's why David's life is so important. A man that was imperfect. His heart was towards the Lord, but he made all of these mistakes. Turn to Ecclesiastes chapter seven. But you'll find a lot of people out there that just, they're insistent, I'm going to make my own mistakes. I'm going to fall in every hole myself. I want to fall face first and smash my nose into the mud myself every single time. Don't tell me what to do. I'll find those spots myself. I'll step in every trap. I'll get chastised by every rod and I'll just make my own mistakes. You'll find people like that and I don't know what to tell you. Stay out of the way. Look at Ecclesiastes chapter seven. Here's a mistake that we can learn from right here. We just read Song of Solomon. Go read the whole book. Read every chapter in the book and look at that marriage. And then you have that same man at the end of his life says this. Look at verse 28, which my soul seeketh, which yet my soul seeketh, but I find not. One man among a thousand have I found, but a woman among all those have I not found. You had it, buddy. You had it. He had it. He had it. And then he walked so far away from it, he didn't even remember that he had it in the first place. You could get there. Song of Solomon, he had the perfect marriage. And then at the end of his life, he said, but I've never had a great relationship with a woman. Because he didn't maintain that relationship and he let it go. It could happen to him, it could happen to any one of us. So wives, husbands, you know, yes, Valentine's Day, you know, is it good? Is it bad? We shouldn't worship saints, not that anyone would even think about doing something like that here, but we shouldn't worship saints. We shouldn't look at, you know, pagan symbols and pagan gods and stupid naked babies shooting arrows at each other and all that. I mean, how this stuff, you know, even gets into our culture is shocking. But I mean, the point is, I mean, that's not what it's about. But if you want to take Valentine's Day as a reminder of to appreciate and maintain and, you know, just thank God for the blessings that he's given you with the relationships in your wife, especially in your wife, especially with your wife, your husband, it's a great day for that. It's a great day for that. Appreciate your wives, men, appreciate your wives, women, appreciate your husbands, and then maintain that that relationship because it's not just like this thing where I'm married now and I'm going to have a great marriage. You will find you will see so many people that are 60 years old, 70 years old, 80 years old that don't have great marriages. And I think that's the saddest thing. Because they could have that. They worked so hard and were married for so many years and raised children together. And why not want to just live your whole life in joy with that crown on your head and that virtuous woman at your side. It's the probably biggest blessing a man could have in his life, in my opinion. Let's bow our heads and have a word of praise. Let's bow our heads and have a word of praise.