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All right, Song of Solomon, chapter number one. The Bible reads there in the first verse, the Song of Songs, which is Solomon's. Flip over if you will, we're going to come right back to this, but flip over if you would to 1 Kings chapter four. And let me just say a few things about the book of Song of Solomon as I get started tonight. You know, in seven and a half years of preaching, I've only preached one sermon that dealt with the book of Song of Solomon. I preached one sermon that pretty much covered the whole book in that one sermon. There's just so much great information and so much great teaching in the book of Song of Solomon. I'm looking forward to being able to go through it week by week and go into each verse, verse by verse. And tonight, I don't want to spend a lot of time talking about the book of Song of Solomon in general, I'd rather just focus on going through each verse and getting the teachings out of chapter one, but let me start out by saying that all scripture is being given by inspiration of God, and the Bible says that it is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished into all good works. Therefore, Song of Solomon provides doctrine. Now doctrine means teaching, meaning that this book needs to be taught. And this book will rebuke us at times, all scripture will. That's what the Bible says, doesn't it? All scripture will at times correct us. It will instruct us in righteousness, and I do not believe that Song of Solomon is an exception to that. Now we just finished the book of Esther, which is interesting for the fact that it never mentions God one time in the book of Esther. But yet we see God's hand evident all throughout the book of Esther, and Song of Solomon is the same way. But yet these books are both holy scriptures. These books are both written by holy men of God who spake as they were moved by the Holy Ghost. Now first of all I just want to show you that Solomon is the author of the book of Song of Solomon. It's interesting because if you look at 1 Kings 4.23, and good night, I wrote down the wrong verse because that is not the right one, 32, 1 Kings 4.32. It says of Solomon, he spake three thousand proverbs and his songs were a thousand and five. And what the Bible tells us is that Solomon actually wrote a thousand and five songs. That's a lot of songs, okay? Now if you look at the title of Song of Solomon, it's called the Song of Songs, which is Solomon. So that could either mean this is his greatest song, because out of a thousand and five songs, this is the greatest song. Obviously if it's God's word, it's better than anything else that he wrote. Obviously all thousand and five songs are not packed into this one song, but it could be a combination of multiple songs that all deal with the same subject and follow the same theme. But Solomon is definitely the author of the book of Song of Solomon. And it says in verse number one of Song of Solomon, the song of songs which is Solomon's. Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth, for thy love is better than wine. Now the first thing I want to point out about the book of Song of Solomon is that it goes back and forth between speaking from the husband's perspective and speaking from the wife's perspective. And you say, well how do I know who's talking? Well when it's talking about him kissing me, you know, that's her talking, okay? So it's not really rocket science to figure out whether the husband is speaking or the wife is speaking. But what's funny about that is that if you look at chapter two, verse one, it says I am the rose of Sharon and the lily of the valleys, okay? Now just at first blush when you look at that verse, who do you think is talking, the husband or the wife? The wife, because she's calling herself a lily and a rose. But look at verse two, as the lily among thorns, so is my love among the what? So who's the lily here? The one that's of the daughters, the female here. But yet there's a song in the hymnal called the lily of the valley about Jesus saying he's the lily of the valley. This is the only place the lily of the valley is mentioned and it's spoken by a woman saying that she's the lily of the valley, okay? So you see how some songs in the hymnal don't really have any basis in reality or in the Bible, okay? That's why we've never sung that song here and we never will because I don't think it's right to refer to Jesus Christ as the lily of the valley or the rose of Sharon because that is not a manly comparison. That's a very feminine comparison. And as you read through the Song of Solomon, you'll see that the husband or the man is very often likened unto very manly things and the woman is likened unto very feminine things. Look at the next verse. Good night, I'm preaching through chapter two. I'm supposed to be in chapter one. It says in verse three, as the apple tree among the trees of the wood, so is my beloved among the sons. Now would you rather be compared to a lily or an apple tree? There you go, exactly. So anyway, let's go back to chapter one though. So just so you know, there's a dialogue here taking place. This is basically the husband speaking to the wife and the wife speaking to the husband. Now you say, well how do we know this is husband and wife? Because over and over again in the book, the word spouse is used and spouse is a term that means husband and wife. Several times, for example, five times in chapter four the word spouse is used. The word spouse is used again in chapter five. So these people are married. These are not unmarried people. And that's why they're expressing their love often in such a physical way, because they are married. Now, there are other interpretations of the book of Song of Solomon. Some would say, hey, this is about a husband and wife, which is what it's actually about if you just read the book and just believe what it says. Then there's another interpretation that says, oh, it's about this shepherd boy. Okay, who's ever heard this shepherd boy interpretation? A few people have heard sermons like that and they say, you know, I've heard it said this way, it's this love triangle between Solomon, the Shulamite, and the shepherd boy. You know, basically it's like she's choosing between Solomon and the shepherd boy. Now here's what's so foolish about that. The word boy is never found in this book and yet all these preachers that have nothing to do with one another are all preaching this shepherd boy concept when the word boy does not exist in this book. So that shows you that people are not getting their doctrine from the Bible, they're getting it from a commentary, they're all reading the same commentary that talks about the shepherd boy. Now that doctrine is bizarre. I've read through this book many times, I have several chapters of this book memorized. I don't see it. It isn't there, okay? There is no shepherd boy or love triangle. The whole book is about two people that are already married. So nobody's choosing here. We don't have a woman who's choosing between two people. What we have here is a woman who's already married to a man and that husband of white are expressing their love and affection one to another. Now it says in verse 2, let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth for thy love is better than wine. And one of the things that I want to point out first of all and a theme of this book is love. And here we see love being expressed in a physical way. Now many people in their zeal to promote love that is not physical, which obviously there are many types of love in the Bible and many types of love in this world, they would try to completely divorce the physical aspect from love. But here God is showing that kissing with the mouth is a way to express love unto your spouse. In fact, it's a way that we should be expressing love unto our spouse. Now obviously we're talking about people that are married, we're talking about people that are husband and wife, but the Bible says here let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth and you say well maybe he's just kissing her on the cheek or on the forehead, but it says for thy love is better than wine. Basically there she's referring to the fact, and if you would flip over to chapter 5 verse 16, the first word there it says his mouth is most sweet. So this is two people that are married kissing on the mouth, you know every child is grossed out right now, but you know this is a husband and wife that are kissing each other on the mouth and I'll say this, there are people who are married who never kiss each other or rarely kiss each other and if that's you there's something wrong with your marriage. Now the primary application of the book of Song of Solomon is that it is a book about marriage. It's a book about a husband and wife. Now there is a secondary symbolic application of Christ in the church. I don't want to discount that, there are some analogies and some parallels, but we never want to get too focused on symbolism and secondary applications to the point where we miss the primary application, where we can't see the forest for the trees, where we can't see what's right there under our noses, what the Bible is actually literally saying here. Basically this is talking about a husband kissing his wife, that's what it says. And this is something that should be a part of our marriage and if this is not a part of your marriage then there's something wrong in your marriage that needs to be corrected. And that's what the Bible teaches in Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 2. It says in verse 3, because of the savor of thy good ointments, thy name is as ointment poured forth, therefore do the virgins love thee. Now verse 3 is very interesting, if you would flip back just a few pages in your Bible to Ecclesiastes chapter number 10, it should just be one page to the left in your Bible, because this idea of the savor, our modern word for savor would be smell. So when it says because of the savor of thy good ointments, thy name is as ointment poured forth, we're talking about the aroma or smell that's coming off of ointment. But it's interesting because the ointment is likened unto his name. It says because of the savor of thy good ointments, thy name is as ointment poured forth. Now compare that with Ecclesiastes chapter 10 verse 1. It says dead flies cause the ointment of the apothecary to send forth a stinking savor, so doth a little folly him that is in reputation for wisdom and honor. So here's a verse that also talks about the savor of an ointment, and in Song of Solomon chapter 1 we see the savor of an ointment. In chapter 10 verse 1 of Ecclesiastes it's talking about his reputation, do you see that? And in Song of Solomon chapter 1 it's talking about his name. Now listen, your name in the Bible is your reputation. Like when the Bible talks about a good name is rather to be chosen than silver. What it's talking about is that when people hear your name, it brings to mind someone who's honorable, someone that they respect, someone who has a good reputation. So here we see that a little folly can destroy the reputation of someone who is in reputation for wisdom and honor, just like a tiny little fly can land in a pot of very good smelling ointment and cause the whole thing to send forth a stinking savor. Now what's interesting about that is if we relate that to marriage, we see that the wife is primarily in the Bible told to reverence her husband. The Bible tells the husbands over and over again to love their wives, and isn't that what we saw in chapter 1 verse 2? Showing love in this case by kissing her. It says let him kiss me with the kiss of his mouth for thy love is better than wine. That's husbands love your wives, if we take that in the New Testament. And then the Bible says in the New Testament, and see that the wife reverence her husband. That's another word for the word reverence, respect. But reverence is a much stronger word for respect, but it means respect. So what's interesting here is that we see that his name is respectable here. We see a name or a reputation that has a sweet savor to it. Now if we look up every time the word savor is used in the Bible, it starts out being used when people begin to sacrifice unto the Lord. When they get off the ark, Noah offers a sacrifice unto the Lord, and the Lord smells a sweet smelling savor. And all throughout Leviticus, Numbers, all throughout Ezekiel, we hear about the sweet savor of the offerings that people make unto God. Then when we come into the New Testament, we see that the savor is often likened to basically how the world perceives us, or sees us from the outside. Our reputation if you will. Because for example, the Bible says in Matthew 5.13, ye are the salt of the earth, but if the salt have lost his savor, wherewith shall it be salted? It is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out and to be trodden under foot of men. Ye are the light of the world, a city that is set on a hill cannot be hid, neither do men light a candle and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick, and give it light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your Father which is heaven. We're talking about people seeing your good works and glorifying your Father which is in heaven. Then go to 2 Corinthians chapter 2, I want you to actually turn there. 2 Corinthians chapter 2, while you're turning there I'll read for you from Luke 14. It says in verse 34, salt is good, but if the salt have lost his savor, wherewith shall it be seasoned? It is neither fit for the land, nor yet for the dung hill, but men cast it out. He that hath ears to hear, let him hear. So God's saying it's important that we have the right savor. That means that we show our good works unto men, that we have a good reputation before men, that we live our lives in a way that is above reproach, where people see our good works and glorify our Father which is in heaven. In 2 Corinthians 2, 14 it says, now thanks be unto God which always causeth us to triumph in Christ and maketh manifest the savor of his knowledge by us in every place. For we are unto God a sweet savor of Christ, and then that are saved and then that perish to the one, we are the savor of death unto death. Let me ask this, does this mean that the unsaved are going to like us? Or that we're going to have a good reputation to the unsaved? No, when we have the right savor in our lives, when we are as salt that has the right savor, and when we are doing good works whereby men see our good works and glorify God, okay we are reflecting Christ, we're a sweet savor of Christ, people see Christ in us, but that's not always what they want to see. And so to those that are unsaved, he says, it's a savor of death. It's a savor that is not always pleasant to the unbelievers, to the ungodly, but it says to the other, the savor of life unto life, and in verse 15, see how it says in them that saved and then that perish, so that means the ones that perished were the savor of death. To those that are saved, we are the savor of life unto life, and in verse 16 it says, and who is sufficient for these things, meaning, you know, even though we're not worthy to be a representation of Christ, we are though, because we are his ambassadors according to chapter 5. It says, for we are not as many which corrupt the word of God, but as of sincerity, but as of God and the sight of God speak we in Christ. So we speak Christ's word, we don't corrupt it as others, and we are the savor of Christ unto this world. We should be a reflection of what Jesus Christ is. So back to Song of Solomon, what we see in chapter 1 verse 2 is that, you know, the husband loves his wife, and then in chapter 3 we see that the husband is respected and reverenced by his wife, okay, because he has a name and she's praising his name and lifting up his name and saying that he has a good name. His name is as ointment poured forth, and then look at the end of verse 3, therefore do the virgins love thee. Look at the end of verse 4 of Song of Solomon 1, it says the upright love thee. Does it say everybody loves you? Everybody loves you. See how this ties in with 2 Corinthians, it's saying no, the upright love thee, the virgins love thee. You know, God is saying here, you have a good name, your name is as ointment poured forth. So when the Bible teaches us that we should have a good name and a good reputation and be a good saver, that's not telling us to have that amongst the heathen necessarily. That's not saying be loved by the world, be loved by the heathen, you know, that's the false prophets. That's though the world will love you if you're of the world. Jesus said you're not of the world even as I'm not of the world. He said if they hate you, know that they hated me before they hated you. But we should have a good name amongst God's people. We should be respected by the people of God, respected by godly men and women, and the Bible is teaching here that a husband should be referenced and respected by his wife. And look, God commands husbands to love their wives, does he not? And not just to show that through kissing them on the mouth, obviously there are many other ways, that's just what we see in verse 2, plenty of other teaching on that in the Bible. But the Bible also commands wives to reverence their husband. Now look, often when you tell a wife to reverence her husband, here's what she'll say, well, he's just not very reverence worthy. That's what they'll often say. So does the Bible say, reverence your husband if he's worthy of it? No, because I'll say this, who is sufficient for these things? Who really is worthy of total reverence? But let me ask you this, what woman is worthy of total love? You know, what it is is it's all by grace. And so what we see is that we should love our wives even when they're not completely lovable, okay? And our wives should reverence us even when we're not completely reverence worthy or respectable. But let me say this though, if you're a wise husband, if you're a godly husband, you should seek to be the kind of man that is easy for your wife to reverence. Easy to respect. And as a wife, you should seek to be a wife that is easy to love. Be lovable. Okay, and not just say, well, you just have to love me anyway or you just have to respect me anyway. It's true, you do. You most certainly do. But we should strive to be worthy of that reverence and worthy of it. Look, when you're acting like a child, when you're lazy, when you're not providing for your family, when you are fooling around with the things of this world, when you sit around playing a video game for hours and hours, yay, days on end. Those are things that could make it hard for your wife to reverence you or respect you when she sees you being a fool, okay? When she sees you lack Bible knowledge, she's going to struggle to reverence you. When she sees you lazy and not able to hold down a job, it's going to be hard for her to reverence you. Now look, if you're a lady in here thinking, well, Pastor Anderson sees what I'm saying. No I don't, because the Bible commands you to unconditionally reverence your husband just like the husband should unconditionally love his wife. But I'm just speaking to the men right now. You know, we should strive to be men that are worthy of respect and worthy of reverence. You know, if you want to be respected, you've got to have a good name and a good reputation with your wife and with your children and show them a godly example and be someone that they can look up to and where they don't have to struggle and strive to have to look up to you, but try to be someone who's worthy of that praise and of that respect. It says in verse 4, draw me, we will run after thee, the king hath brought me into his chambers, we will be glad and rejoice in thee, we will remember thy love more than wine the upright love thee. And that's just a great verse on the gladness and joy that's found within marriage. Marriage should be a relationship that brings a lot of joy and gladness to our life, and it can be. Or it can be a relationship that brings sorrow, you know, when it's not biblical, when the love isn't there and when the reverence is not there. We already covered the upright love thee. Look at verse 5, it says I am black but comely, oh ye daughters of Jerusalem, as the tents of Kedar, as the curtains of Solomon. Now comely means that you're good looking, but it's not a really strong word for being good looking. You know what I mean? Other words, what's a stronger word that the Bible uses for being fair or beautiful or things like that? You know, comely just means that it's just a lesser term. What she says here is I'm black but comely, oh ye daughters of Jerusalem, as the tents of Kedar, as the curtains of Solomon. Look not upon me because I'm black. Now this isn't saying, you know, that she's African. She's not saying, you know, I'm black, like she's from Ethiopia or something. What it's saying here is that she's black because the sun, look at verse 6 there, because I'm black because the sun hath looked upon me. My mother's children were angry with me, they made me the keeper of the vineyards, but my known vineyard have I not kept. So here what we see is that this is one who is blackened by the sun. Not saying she's of the black race, you know, if you want to use the word race, which is not a biblical word, but the Bible talks about people being black or Ethiopian or whatever in the Bible, that's not what this is referring to. Basically what we see when she talks about being black because the sun has looked upon her, she says look not upon me because I'm black. So she's using that basically to be down on her own appearance. Now look, if I ask for a raise of hands right now, whose wife has ever been down on their appearance to you? You know, don't raise your hand, but every single husband's hand would probably go up. Isn't that true? I mean probably, you're like, no, you know? But anyway, you know, you hear women constantly do this, don't you? Now they're not saying I'm black, you know, but they're basically going to say things about their appearance that they don't like. You know, whatever it is, either their hair isn't right or their skin isn't right or their weight isn't right, isn't that a big one in this eating disorder crazed society in which we live where everyone's obsessed with looking like they just came out of a concentration camp or something? But anyway, you know, this society presses forward this view of, you know, all women have to look the same way, you know? So women are down on their appearance, but even thousands of years ago they were down on their appearance. You know, now everybody wants to be tan, right? I mean they go to a tanning booth so that they can get black, you know? And they want to be looked upon by the sun, they do it on purpose, but you know, obviously this woman is down on her appearance, and by the way, that just goes to show you that not everybody likes the same appearance. I mean there are obviously men out there who like a tanned appearance. That's why people spend all this money to go to the tanning booth. Somebody must like the way that looks, okay? And then there are other cultures and societies and people where, you know, whiteness was what they were looking for or something in between. Just different people have different tastes is what I'm saying, okay? So here she's down on her appearance. She's saying, you know, don't look on me, I'm black, I've been out in the sun, I haven't been pampered and preened as much as I should have. And it says, and I'll come back to what it says in verse 6, but look at the response in verse 8. It says, if thou know not, O thou fairest among women, go thy way forth by the footsteps of the flock and feed thy kids beside the shepherd's tents. Now this is one of the many, many times that you will find in this book the husband praising the wife's appearance. I mean it's all throughout the book of Song of Solomon. It's every chapter. I remember when I was in high school, my Bible teacher at Christian school, he told me, he said, I don't compliment my wife's appearance much. I don't tell her she's beautiful that much because he said, you know, I don't want her to think that that's why I love her. I want her to know I love her for what's inside. So I don't compliment her appearance that much or tell her she's beautiful that much. You're so wise and so smart. Too bad what you're saying is completely contrary to what the Bible teaches, Mr. Bible Teacher. And there's no Bible verse that teaches that. But we have a lot of people who get up and say a lot of cute things and call it a Bible class. You're sitting in a Bible class where we're actually looking at the Bible and we're looking at a book where there's a lot of times where the husband is praising his wife's appearance. And even if we were to step outside the book of Song of Solomon, we're going to find many instances where God praises the appearance of women and where husbands praise the appearance of their wife. Look, this is something that we should be doing. This is something that should instruct us in righteousness. You know, if you're smart, you will praise your wife's appearance. And look, your wife will be down. I'm sure that everybody in this room thinks that their wife is very beautiful. And you know what? I'm not one of these that thinks, well, you know, 1% of people, 1% of people are good looking. 99% look up. I mean, that's the way some, it's bizarre. You know, if God created us the way that we are, and we're all fearfully and wonderfully made, you know, we all have good attributes about our appearance. I mean, you know, not as much the men, but I mean, you know, all women have good attributes as their appearance, the way that God made them. Now some women, you know, dramatically alter their appearance and that's, you know, then all bets are off. You know, I'll say that you're beautiful the way God made you. You start dramatically altering your appearance, all bets are off. You know, when you start getting the plastic surgery and you start applying all the makeup and you start doing all the modifications and you know, I mean, you can alter your appearance, but honestly, you know, I guarantee you that every husband in this room would agree that his wife is beautiful, but you ought to tell your wife that she's beautiful because she might be down on her appearance from time to time. So you need to let her know that you find her beautiful and you know what, I'm not saying to lie about it because I know that it would be from the heart. I know you believe that. You know, and here's the thing, even if your wife is not perfect in every way, but you can praise about her appearance the best attributes and the part that you do find the most beautiful and emphasize that, okay? So we can learn a lot from this chapter about the fact that here's a woman who's down on her appearance saying, don't look at me, I've been in the sun too long, my skin's messed up, and then he's praising her, calling her the fairest of women in the next breath, okay? So that's a lesson for us, okay, to do the same thing. But look at what it says in verse 6, it says, Look not upon me because I am black, because the sun had looked upon me. My mother's children were angry with me. Talk about her siblings. They made me the keeper of the vineyards, but mine own vineyard have I not kept. Now, sadly, this is the case with many ladies where they're keeping someone else's vineyard, but they're not keeping their own vineyard. You know, I even preached a sermon many, many years ago called Keep Your Own Vineyard, and there are so many scriptures in the Bible that teach us to take care of our own things and so forth. But, you know, when I think about this in regard to marriage, which is what we're mainly dealing with in the Song of Solomon, keeping your own vineyard. You know, I would say this is the difference between a stay-at-home wife and a wife that is sent off to go serve someone else, okay? And that's not popular preaching, but I'm not a popular preacher, so that's why I'm preaching it. And the thing is, you know, the Bible does teach that wives should be, you know, keepers at home, okay, and not to neglect their duties at home to go out and work and earn a living and have a career and neglect the duties at home and then expect the husband to do the work. No, that's not how it works in the Bible, okay? Now you say, well, my husband makes me work, well, okay, then that's his problem. You know, blame him. But let me say this though, husband, you shouldn't send your wife to work. You shouldn't make your wife work. You should provide. You say, well, we just can't make it on my income. Get a second job. Many of us have done it for a long time. We've worked many hours, above 40 hours a week. I'd rather do the work of two people so that my wife could stay at home and raise the children and be there for them and homeschool them and teach them and keep my vineyard and keep her vineyard than to be keeping someone else's vineyard. Now here's what's funny about this though. When we think of this concept of, you know, keeping someone else's vineyard and not keeping your own vineyard, okay? My wife and I were out to lunch last week because my mother was in town babysitting so we, you know, we rarely get to go out, just the two of us, because we don't just leave our children with anybody. We only leave them with my mother, you know. We just leave them with somebody that we know we can trust. And so we don't just hire babysitters and drop them off with anybody. So my mom was in town and she was watching the kids so we were out to lunch together and you know, the waitress came and the waitress was dressed very nicely and she was very polite and she was very professional and she served us very well and treated us very well and brought us our food and on and on. And my wife said to me, she said, you know what's funny? She said, when I do this for you, basically I'm considered some kind of an anomaly or I'm considered basically, you know, oh yeah, she's just so degraded, serving her husband, you know, how demeaning, what a doormat, right? But she said it's funny how when you get hired to do this for strangers, it's considered a perfectly normal job and it is a perfectly normal job. But here's the funny thing. What if a wife dressed up nicely, right, came over, you know, brought the food to the table, put it in front of her husband, can I get you anything else? Oh here, let me top off your drink for you. Right, you'd say like, oh man, what in the world? What kind of a male chauvinist, right? But you go to a restaurant and that's what they do to you all the time, they serve you like that, right? So if a woman goes out and keeps someone else's vineyard, that's fine. She starts keeping her own vineyard and all of a sudden it's degrading, it's demeaning. And you know what, let me just say it, let me just come right out and say it right now. If you feel that you would be uncomfortable serving your husband a meal, are you listening? You are so feminist and you are so off the deep end, you need to get right with God and you need to be at every single week of this series on Wednesday nights and get every chapter of Song of Solomon and then you need to get every marriage sermon I've ever preached and listened to it forward and backward, okay? If you think that it's strange or antiquated or bizarre for a wife to serve a meal to her husband, I mean what planet are you from? But today that's the bizarro world we live in in America with these liberated women, they won't even serve a meal to their husband. But they'll go and do it for everybody else. They'll go put on a name tag, they'll put on a hair net, they'll clock in, they'll say yes sir to the boss, and they'll call you honey and sugar. You don't even know them, right? You know what I'm talking about, you go out to eat and it's like, you know, more coffee honey? You know, hey can I top that drink up for you? You know what, what if your wife came and topped your drink off at home? You know what, I think that'd be great, okay? Keep your own vid. Why don't you treat the one that you love the most, your husband, why don't you treat him as well as a woman will treat a complete stranger as a waitress? I mean think about that, isn't that interesting? Think about that and dwell on that. It says in Song of Solomon 1.6 that they made me the keep, my mother's children were angry with me, they made me the keeper of the vineyards, but mine own vineyard have I not kept. So keeping the vineyards of others was a punishment. Keeping your own vineyard is a good thing or a privilege, right? So which one is better, keeping your own vineyard or keeping somebody else's vineyard? Think about it. Okay, let's keep reading. It says in verse 7, Tell me, O thou whom my soul loveth, where thou feedest, where thou makest thy flock to rest at noon, for why should I be as one that turneth aside by the flocks of thy companions? Now this verse right here is a great verse where the wife is expressing to her husband that she's only interested in him, right? She's basically saying, look, I want to go where you're feeding the flock, I don't want to go by the flocks of your companions, I'm not interested in other men, I want to see you and you alone. You know what, this shows me a wife who is expressing to her husband that she's only interested in him as a man. That's what we see in verse 7. You say, why is that important? Because husbands are jealous. The Bible says in Proverbs that jealousy is the rage of a man. You say that's sin. Okay, look up every time the word jealousy is mentioned in the Bible, always positive. God is jealous, God's name is jealous. There's nothing wrong with being jealous. Now we often confuse the word jealous with envy. In the Bible these two things are different. Here's the colossal difference between jealousy and envy. Envy is when I look at what someone else has and I want what they have. That's envy. Envy is when I look at what I have and I say, this is mine and I'm keeping it because it belongs to me and I'm not going to share it with anyone. Now obviously there are certain things that we should share, right? Should we share our food? Should we share our money? You know, if we have extra money, should we give to the poor and give to the him that hath not? Okay, what if we have two coats and someone else has none? The Bible says, let him that hath two coats impart unto him that hath not. So there are some things that we share, but let me tell you something. Your wife is not one of them. And you know what? You say, well I'm just not a jealous husband. Well then get right with God. Start being a biblical husband. Let me know when you become one. Because we ought to be jealous. We ought to be protective of our wife. We ought to, oh I have no problem with my wife hanging around with other men, on the phone with other men, having lunch with other men. You're a fool is what you are. I don't want her going by the tents of my companions. You know what I mean? I want my wife, and by the way, men like to hear that from their wife. Because men do, sometimes the spirit of jealousy just comes over a man. Have you read that in Numbers? In the book of Numbers it explains how the spirit of jealousy will come upon a man and how to deal with it. And let me tell you this, you know, if you're a wife, your husband wants to hear that you're only interested in him, that you only have eyes for him. He doesn't want to hear you tell him about how great this guy is and how great that guy is. And you say, well Pastor Anderson, you know, I find this sermon, well the sermon is going to get way more offensive in a few minutes, so you better just buckle your seatbelt. But let me say this though, if you're smart, instead of looking at me like I have two heads or thinking to myself, oh Pastor Anderson's extreme or all that, you know what, if you're smart you should be listening to what I'm saying, because this is how to have a good marriage. And if you would put the, look, don't you want to have a good marriage? Okay wives, here's how you have a good marriage, wives. Tell your husband that you're only interested in him. Tell him that you only have eyes for him. Tell him that he's the only man that you're, you know what, because that's what he wants to hear because men are jealous by nature, because we're made in the image of God whose name is jealous. Okay? And you know, you want to be a good wife and have a good marriage, he'd say yeah but my husband this, my husband that. But here's the thing, you do your part. And here's, and I'm going to get on the husbands in a second, but right now talking to the wives, serve your husband, treat him right, keep your own vineyard. Tell him that he's the only one. Okay? Now look, here's where I'm going to get into trouble. In verse 9 it says, I've compared thee, O my love, to a company of horses in Pharaoh's chariots. Now that's an interesting comparison to make, isn't it? He says I've compared thee, O my love, to a company of horses in Pharaoh's chariots. Now I've thought long and hard about that verse, because that's an interesting verse. Now you say, well how dare you compare women to an animal, but here's the thing. Jesus Christ himself is often compared unto an animal. For example, Jesus Christ is called the lamb of God. Jesus Christ is called the lion of the tribe of Judah. Jesus Christ is compared unto an ox. Jesus Christ is compared unto an eagle. So if it's good enough for the son of God to be compared to the positive attributes of an animal, for example later on he says that his wife has dove's eyes. A dove is a what? It's a bird, it's an animal. What I'm saying is don't be offended and say, ah, you're comparing it to an animal. No, no. Men are compared to animals too. It's just we can take attributes of animals and learn from them. We are not animals. We are human beings made in the image of God, but God tells us if we're lazy to go to the ant, thou sluggard, and consider her ways and be wise. So can't we learn things from animals? We can learn how to work hard, we can learn how to be a leader, we can learn these things. So the Bible says I've compared thee, O my love, to a company of horses in Pharaoh's cherries. Now if this husband is comparing his wife to a company of horses, and she's not taking an insult because this is an expression of love and affection when he compares his wife to a company of horses in Pharaoh's cherries. Now I've been learning a lot about horses lately. Now I'll confess to you right now that I don't know a whole lot about horses. I did not grow up around horses. I've only been horseback riding a few times in my life. So I am by no stretch of the imagination an expert in horses. Most of what I know about horses I've read in the Bible. But lately I've been learning a lot about horses and the reason why is because a friend of ours is giving horseback riding lessons to my son Isaac. So once a week, it's just a friend thing, and once a week my son Isaac gets about an hour long horseback riding lesson and I'm the one who takes him to the lesson usually because it's real early in the morning and it happens to fall on a day when I can do that. So I take him over there and I sit and I usually observe all or most of the lesson and I'm usually listening. So by listening to these lessons I've learned a lot about horses just by listening as he's getting even more interested. He's the one doing the work and really doing the learning. But here are some things that I've learned about horses as we make this comparison, comparing her to a company of horses in Pharaoh's cherries. First of all I learned that you have to earn their respect. They don't act the same for two different people. For example the horse reacted very differently to the owner of that horse than it does to Isaac. You know Isaac has to work to earn the trust and earn the respect of the horse. The horse does not just instantly obey him the way that it obeyed its owner and so he has to earn that respect. I thought that was interesting. I also noticed that, you know, horses take a lot of care. First of all, horses are expensive. So I think this is probably the primary application, okay, when he says I've compared the, you know, and notice it's not just one horse, it's a company of horses in Pharaoh's chariots, so it's probably the best horses, probably costs a lot of money. I mean horses are expensive to buy and very expensive to maintain. And not only are they expensive to maintain, but horses, are you starting to see the parallels? But also they take a lot of work to maintain. See when Isaac goes to his riding lesson, it's great because he doesn't just learn how to ride the horse, he actually learns a lot about horsemanship. And he also learns just how to care for the horse. So usually when he first gets there, he does things like brushing the horse, you know, they're brushed very often, sometimes he'll wash the horse, sometimes he'll lift up its feet and he takes this little tool and picks out, am I getting this right Isaac? Take the dirt and stuff out of the bottom of the hoop. And then he learns how to put the halter, what do you put on it, the halter and what else? A bridle, that's what I was looking for. The halter, the bridle, the saddle, you know, you put all this stuff on, he learns how to use this various equipment, he learns, and he's not just riding the horse, he learns a lot about just walking around with the horse. He learns all the parts of the horse and he studies the horse. And I mean, he did a homework assignment where he had to fill out how many parts of the horse? He had to identify 30 different parts of the horse, stuff I've never even heard of, you know, the fetlock and the pastern and the, you know, all this stuff that I've never heard of. So, you know, he has to learn all about the horse. And the teacher's telling me, you have to learn all these different parts of the horse, it's really important to know these different parts of the horse and to learn about how to talk to the horse and how to deal with the horse, how to care for, you have to brush the horse, you know, and clean the horse and take care of the horse. There's a lot of effort and care and expense in maintaining a horse. In fact, we met a girl the other day, she volunteers at this place where she takes people on tours and riding. She works 12 to 15 hour days, unpaid, riding a horse, and you say, well, why would she do that? Because she just wants to ride a horse and it's so expensive to have your own horse and maintain it. It just works out, she just volunteers and does what she loves, riding a horse. Because it takes a lot of care to maintain. But I also noticed this, is that, you know, with a horse, you have to establish yourself as the boss with a horse. You know, and as soon as you stop being the boss, they'll take over and do what they want to do. If you're not in command, if you're not being a boss, you know, they will take over and they will not obey you, they'll do what they want to do. And you know, I also noticed this, is that, you know, when you try to have a tug of war with a horse, right, you don't win by overpowering them in a tug of war, because what happens is sometimes when you tug on them, they just become indignant and just start tugging back, right? You know, if you don't do it just right, okay? So, his teacher is constantly telling him, you know, it's not a tug of war. It's not that you're just trying to just all the time, you know, or just cruelly, just making the horse do what you want it to do all the time. That's not really, if you see people deal with horses, that's not what they do. Because basically what they do is, it's more that they're signaling the horse. You know, when they, for example, when they're riding the horse and they squeeze it with their heels, or kick it with their heels, it's more of a communication that's taking place. It's more of a signal that's being sent. Or when you pull the reins, pull it this way. It's not that you're just like, you're going to go this way, you know. It's more like you just give them a tug, letting them know, hey, I'm telling you where to go. I'm telling you to go this way. You know, I'm telling you to get going. And what it is, is it's more of a signaling, because the horse eventually respects you and wants to obey you and does what it's told and realizes, hey, you're the boss. You know, I'm going to follow you. Now there's a horse that Isaac is often riding, it's called Jester. And this horse Jester is a really difficult horse for Isaac. You know, because this horse, I mean, he'll sit there and he'll give it commands and he's squeezing it with his heels and he's pulling the reins and it just doesn't want, and sometimes it just turns around and looks at him like, who do you think you are? And you know, I was sitting there thinking, you know, because I don't know much about horses, I'm watching Isaac just really struggling hard to get this horse to do what he wants to do and he's working so hard and the thing just doesn't want to obey. And I'm just thinking, and there's another horse that she has that's really responsive, you know, unto commands. Just really responsive, it'll do what he wants it to do. But this horse, it's just like pulling teeth to get this thing to do anything. But that's why she's using this horse to teach him, because if he can control this horse then he can control any horse. But it's funny watching this, because I watched a lesson one time where Isaac was struggling to get the horse to do what he wanted, well in the very end, the teacher, she hopped upon the horse and she just made this horse just do everything perfectly. Just it did everything. It went this way, it went that way, it trotted, it stopped. I mean it was just so responsive to her. And she told Isaac, she said, when you've learned, this is how you will ride this horse and the horse will do exactly for you what you want it to do. And oftentimes Isaac will be struggling to get it to do something and he gets frustrated, but she'll say, nope, the horse is doing exactly what you're telling it to do. Because what it is, is for example, he'll be accidentally pulling the rein one way and kind of telling it to go another way, or for example, he's pulling back on the reins and telling it to go forward at the same time, he's got the brakes on, as it were. It's like pushing the brakes and the gas at the same time. Or for example, he'll be looking the wrong way, because you've got to look the way you want the horse to go, because it can feel your body where you're looking. And she'll say, she'll say, he's doing, she'll say about the horse, he's doing exactly what you're telling him to do. But Isaac's thinking, that's not what I want him to do though. Yeah, but he's doing what you're telling him to do, okay? So what we see with Jester is that the problem is not with the horse, oh no. The problem is with the rider. Because you get the right rider on that horse, and that horse will do exactly as it's told, it'll do what it's supposed to do. Okay, I've compared the Oh My Love to a company of horses in Pharaoh's Terrace. You know, horses will do what the owner tells them to do, but if the owner doesn't know what he's doing, he's not going to get what he wants out of it. Is it the horse's fault? No, because the horse is often confused. And oftentimes we send mixed messages to our wife. You know, we're pulling the reins, we're kicking with our heels at the same time, and she's like, you know, doesn't know what to do. Doesn't know what we want, okay? And so this is what we have to be careful of. For example, here's a great example of a mixed message, right? You know, you tell your wife, you tell your wife, I'm the boss, I'm the head of the home, you know, I'm going to lead here, right? But then every time there's a decision, or every time anything needs to happen, you're constantly asking, what do we do? What do we do? Or is this okay? Is it okay if I do this? Is it okay if I do this? And look, I'm telling you, it is epidemic in 2013 amongst husbands. I notice this. I get around husbands, I hear them asking their wife permission for everything. Stuff that doesn't even affect her. I mean, you ask them, hey, can you do this at this time? Has nothing to do, it's a time that she's not even around, it has nothing to do with, oh, honey, is it alright if I do this? And they're constantly asking their wife's permission, you know what, you're basically sending a signal, you're the boss. I mean think about it, if I ask my wife's permission for everything I do, and every time there's a decision I ask her to make it for me, basically what I'm telling her is you're the boss. But then I turn around and say verbally, no, I'm the boss. Oh, can I do this? Can I go outside and play with my friends? Can I go play down the street with my friends? I'm just joking. But you see what I'm saying? A mixed message. And you know, we could linger on this point all night, I'm not going to. You say, well that's a single horse, why a company of horses? Because you know what, a single horse would not be near complicated enough to describe how to handle women. So that's why it has to be like, you know, dealing with one woman is like dealing with a whole company of horses. So I don't know what Solomon was thinking when he got into polygamy, but anyway that's another sermon. So anyway, there's a lot that we can learn from horses because horses are great animals. And they're very beautiful animals, they're very noble animals, and they're very helpful animals and they're very obedient animals. They're not like the, what's the one that's not obedient? The mule or the ass. What's that? A cat, yeah I know, cats don't do what you want them to do. Oh man, thank God women are not like cats. Good night. Cats are so annoying, I'm sorry. You know what I don't, can I tell you what I don't like about cats? This deserves a whole sermon. But you know, this is what I don't like about cats. They come up to you like, I guess I'll let you pet me if I want. Whereas dogs, you know, they're more meek, aren't they? Aren't they more humble? I mean they come to you and just tell you I want to be petted, right? Cats are just like, I guess. They're so arrogant and prideful and haughty. Oh man, cats drive me nuts. Actually I love cats, they taste like chicken. Alright, but anyway, back to Song of Solomon chapter one. So you know, it's an interesting comparison, I don't have all night and I'm not really an expert on horses, you know, you're going to have to do your own research, but I just thought that was interesting. One of the parallels that I saw between, you know, learning how to ride a horse and basically learning how to have a good marriage. You know, you can't just ugh, you know, and send all these mixed messages and you know what? You shouldn't be cruel to a horse, right? You don't just sit there and just beat the snot out of your horse and you know, and just kick it and beat it and just, ah, blankety-blank. You know, usually you see people that are good with their horse and you can tell they love their horse, right? And they treat it well, they take, they brush it and take care of it and they love it and in return it's obedient to them. It serves them well. You know, similar to marriage, you know, husbands love your wives and the wife is to obey and reverence her husband. Anyway, I don't want to spend the whole thing on that, I'm almost out of time. It says in verse 10, thy cheeks are comely with rows of jewels, thy neck with chains of gold, we will make the borders of gold with studs of silver. Now this is talking about expensive jewelry upon the wife. One thing that we have to think about when we look at this is what the New Testament teaches about this very clearly in 1 Timothy chapter 2 and 1 Peter 3. He warns that women should be dressed in modest apparel and he says, not with broided hair or gold or pearls or costly array, but which becometh women professing godliness with good works. So the Bible teaches very clearly in the New Testament that women should not go out publicly, are you listening, publicly displaying fancy clothes, fancy hairdos, and fancy jewelry. The reason why is because of modesty. You know, you shouldn't go out in life just trying to get everybody's attention, hey everybody, look at me. Look at me everybody. You know, and that's how some women dress and that's what the Bible calls immodest apparel. Immodest clothing. When they're basically showing off their wealth or showing off, you know, how much money they have or how great they look, you know, or you see women that are scantily clad. That's also immodest, showing off their bodies. But here's the thing, this is a woman being beautiful for her husband in Song of Solomon chapter 1. Do you see that? In Song of Solomon chapter 1 she's being beautiful for her husband because if you get the context in verse 12 it says, while the king sitteth at his table, my spikenard sendeth forth the smelter. You know, this is dinner with her husband. But again, also the Bible talks about in the New Testament that the ornaments that a woman should wear are the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, also being adorned with good works, so being adorned with godliness. So this could also be used symbolically to teach that, you know, that we should be, or that ladies should be adorned with godliness, meekness, quietness, and so forth. It says in verse 12, while the king sitteth at his table, my spikenard sendeth forth the smelter thereof. That is like a perfume. And then it says in verse 13, a bundle of myrrh is my well beloved unto me. He shall lie all night betwixt my breasts. Let me just teach something very practical from this verse is that a husband and wife should be sleeping in the same bed. This isn't like the 50s TV show, you know, where they have the two separate beds. You know, okay, if there's a snoring issue or if they, you know, beat you up at night in their sleep because they don't know what they're doing. But that's a rare case. You know, I think in most cases the husband and wife should sleep in the same bed. And we see that in the scripture because it says he shall lie all night betwixt my breasts. Then it says in verse 14, my beloved is unto me as a cluster of campfire in the vineyards of Enjedi. Behold, thou art fair, my love. Behold, thou art fair, thou hast dove's eyes. That's more complimenting of the wife's appearance. And then it says, behold, thou art fair, my beloved. So now she's speaking unto the husband. Yea pleasant, also our bed is green. Now personally I don't look at verse 16 and just think, oh by the way, why don't I tell you what color our bed is? It's green. You know, when things are green, what does green represent? What's that? What do you think green represents? Oh, thou listener. Plants? Plants are green, right? Life? Plants? You're on the right track. Anybody else? Vegetables? Vegetables, okay, those are plants too. Anybody else have anything? Growing or, you know, when I look at this, I'll tell you what I think of when I look at this. When they say, also our bed is green. And I remember reading this even as a teenager and just instantly I understood what this verse meant. Our bed is green is basically referring to the fact that it's fruitful, is the way I look at it. Because you know, when we think of green, we think of plants and growth. We think of growth, multiplication, okay? And so I look at this, I think this is basically referring to the, you know, children being the product of this union. That's my interpretation. And you know, you may disagree and that's fine, you could have a different interpretation. But I look at this as she's saying our bed is green, meaning that there's basically, because obviously the bed is used to refer to the physical relationship between husband and wife. He says, marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled, he's not talking about the physical bed. He's talking about what goes on in the bed. He says, you know, marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled, but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge, okay? So you say, well that's not very romantic, bringing up the fact that children are produced. That's the last thing we want to think about, you know? The bed is green, man, get a different bedspread. You know? And look, my wife and I have been married for 13 years, we have 7 children, our bed's pretty green. But let me say this though, let me say this, I don't have an attitude that says that children are just, oh children are just so unromantic, or oh children are just so, oh man, you know, let's not think about children. You know, honestly, I like the fact that, you know, that basically, that what goes on in the bedroom produces children. You know, I think that's great. I think that God has created that in a marvelous way. I think it's great. You know, and I often like to think of our children as the product of the love between my wife and I. And I think that's a great way to think about it. But you know, we have such a warped view today in 2013 of children, and basically we want to, it's like they want to separate children from where they come from. You know, enter birth control. You know, and enter basically people who want to go to bed with their spouse, but they don't want, they don't want the bed to be green. You know, they don't want to produce the children. And you know, that's not, that's not the way that I look at it. You know, I look at it as a positive thing. And look, the Bible says children are in heritage of the Lord and the fruit of the womb is his reward. That's a positive thing. Having children is a positive thing. So, you know, our bed is green is a compliment there. You know, today that would almost be derogatory. Oh, you know, you guys are very prolific. You know, you guys are, you know, and people are kind of, are you guys going to stop? I'm thinking to myself, no. You know, I mean, I got married and this is what we do and we're going to keep doing it. And we don't need Walgreens' help to do it. You know? And so, this whole attitude of, and people say, are you trying for another one? Okay, stop and think about that. You don't have to try for them. They just keep coming. You just, here's what it is, you just, you do what comes natural and they keep coming and they keep on coming. So don't sit there and say, are you trying for, you have to try not to have one. I mean, people put forth a lot of effort and try very hard not to have kids. You don't have to try to have one. You're supposed to be doing that anyway. And when you do it, you know, eventually children are produced. And so you don't have to try for them. Don't ever ask me if I'm trying, I've never tried for any of them. I'm not like standing in front of a spinning wheel like, come on, come on, like I'm just trying for one. You know? Yes! No, look, this is, and this is what it is. You live your life, you have a natural relationship, a marital, physical relationship with your spouse, children are the product and you praise God when they come. Now look, perhaps you've not been blessed with children. You know? Then patience is what is advised. Because there were people in the Bible who had to wait as long as 20 years before they had a child. You know, Isaac and Rebekah prayed for 20 years without having children. And every single person in the Bible who was unable to have children eventually was able to have a child. And I've known people who tried and tried and tried for years and years and years. We have some friends from California, she just got pregnant, I mean they've been married for 15 years or something like that. So you know, you don't give up hope, you don't give up faith, but here's the bottom line though. If God gives you one, you praise God for the one. And if God gives you 21, you praise God for 21. And you say, ah, you're so ignorant, you barbarian, you're having kids every nine months. Okay, look at my kids, they're all two years apart, approximately. Naturally spaced. We don't use any birth control. None of them are spaced through birth control. And we do not use the abstinence method, or the rhythm method, or the natural family planning method. We don't use any, we use no method of birth control. We don't have any charts and thermometers and you know, we don't do all that. We just do what we do and the children come, and you know, they're spaced accordingly. You know, because my wife nurses the children, she breast feeds the children, and that causes them to be naturally spaced because she can't get pregnant while she's exclusively breastfeeding the way that she does it. And so, you know, that's a whole other subject in and of itself. So I like that statement, our bed is green. That's what I think it means. If you think it means something else, then come up to me after the service and tell me what you think it means. But that's what I believe. It says in verse 17, the beams of our house are cedar and our rafters of fir. Here you know what she's praising? His provision. The fact that he's providing, right? His cedar rafters, fir rafters, that doesn't sound cheap, does it? No. So you know what she's doing? She's praising, and listen, you ought to praise your husband for his provision. Husbands, you ought to love your wife, praise her cooking, praise her good looks, praise everything you can about her, praise her for doing well and doing right, and wives should also praise their husband and basically praise him for his provision. Because you know, we as husbands, we identify ourselves a lot by our work. You know, somebody asks you, who are you or what do you do? It's usually your occupation that kind of defines you in a lot of ways. So we as men take great pride in our work and we like it when our wife appreciates the work that we do and maybe says, hey, thank you for providing X, Y, and Z. Thank you for providing the cedar beams and the fir rafters. Okay, nothing in the Bible is there by accident. You think verse 17 is just this randomness about building materials? No, she's praising him for his provision, for what he's earned and worked hard to provide, and this is a model. So isn't there a lot we can learn from this chapter? I mean, it's packed. Chapter 1 alone. I mean, there's so much to implement in chapter 1 alone to help you in your marriage. There's a whole list for the husband here to work on, okay, here, I can do this, I can do this, you know, tell her this, do this, and then a whole list for the wife, just in chapter 1 alone. The Bible has the answers, folks. We just need to learn from it and put it into practice. Let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer. Father, we thank you so much for your word and we thank you for the wisdom that's found therein and I know I've been married for 13 years and I've also studied the Bible for many, many years. I've read through the Bible many times, I've read through Song of Solomon many times, and it just never ceases to amaze me how much I can learn. Every time I come back to Song of Solomon, every time I come back to Proverbs, I'm constantly learning new things and I'm constantly growing as a husband and as a Christian. I pray that we all would continue to read, continue to study, continue listening to the preaching of your word, and never get to the place where we think that we know everything, where we can't be taught something new. Help us to always be willing to change and become a better husband and a better wife and not to just say, oh, this is how we are. Help us to change, dear God, and to become better and to grow. And in Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Alright, let's go ahead and sing one song before...