coming to steadfast Baptist Church you turn in your hymnals to Psalm 147 get
started this evening and 47 leaning on the everlasting thank you my father so
much for this day thank you for this opportunity to come and to sing praises
unto you I pray that you would bless the aspects of our service keep everyone
safe allowing home safely thank you for what you've given us in Jesus name we
pray amen go to Psalm 10412 singing if you didn't already get a
bulletin like one just lift your hand real quick just come by get you guys a
bulletin on the front where Romans chapter verse 8 inside we have service
times or soul winning times we're gonna suspend soul winning just for today so
if you want to go out and do some soul winning you can but we're just not
gonna have an official program assume people might be home today so there you
go so we have our church stats make sure you're updating our church grad groups
everything on our soul winning stats on the right is a list of expecting ladies
several ladies to be in prayer for we are also just altering our service
schedule just a little bit today so instead of having the service at 430
we're just gonna bump that up to 2 o'clock so if you'd like to stay with us
for the afternoon we'd love for you to be here for the 2 p.m. service for today
if you have not received a 2025 donation statement and you're anticipating that
I asked evangelist for or a send us an email and we'll try to get that
addressed if you by chance notice something that you thought might be an
error also just let us know and we'll try to make sure to get that corrected
usually we're about 99% there's always a chance there could be some kind of mine
minor typo or something so we'd like to get that corrected you can always check
sbckgv.com/college we're trying to help organize some college
events I'll try to keep those updated as much as possible but we already have
some events that have happened already in the East Coast and people were really
positive about some of the results they had and so we're gonna keep organizing
that and hopefully we'll also have some events in our area in the near future
upcoming events we have a missions trip that a lot of people are planning on
going at the end of the month so please be in prayer for them that their trip
would be successful that they would stay healthy that they'd have a great
opportunity to preach the gospel to a lot of people I know Vangels Urbanic is
also planning on trying to make this trip be successful for those that are
traveling over there and so I'm really looking forward to it looking forward
the results that we're able to procure for our churches and the soul winning
that we're doing on the back is a list as a prayer list please keep our church
family in your prayers one other thing I wanted to take note of is we had a
marriage workshop this last Friday and Saturday of course the weather put a
damper on it for a few people some people had signed up and weren't able to
attend we did try to record some of the or most of the events and hopefully
maybe I'll be able to splice it together and put it out there we also
had workbooks that we created and I'll try to put those out available if people
want to just take one and they could always look at it afterwards even if you
weren't able to attend and you're just interested in the information and the
material that we went over. Honestly it was a great event though I think all the
people that did attend at least some portion of it seem to really engage well
and it was nice to see people actually putting some effort and energy into their
relationships and showing up and having a really positive attitude about the
event. It seemed like the event went off really well. Maybe God willing we'll have
another similar event and maybe do some different information, some different
workshop ideas for the future. But a lot of people gave me a lot of positive
feedback and so really encouraged by that. It was a lot of fun. So me and my
wife really enjoyed it and there was a lot of people that helped out. So thank
you so much to all the people that helped out. A lot of people put a lot of
effort energy and helping make that be a success and so thank you very much for
that. And we're gonna go ahead and sing our Psalm now of the week. Finally got
it right. Psalm 15, okay? Psalm 15 and our special binders played around. If you
turn in your Bibles to Ephesians chapter number 5, read the entire chapter.
Ephesians chapter number 5. As we read the chapter, Bible says, "Be ye
therefore followers of God as dear children and walk in love as Christ
also hath loved us and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to
God for a sweet smelling savor. But fornication and all uncleanness or
covetousness, let it not be once named among you as becometh saints, neither
filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor jesting which are not convenient, but
rather giving of thanks. For this ye know, that no whoremonger, nor unclean person,
nor covetous man who is an idolater, hath any inheritance in the kingdom of
Christ and of God. Let no man deceive you with vain words, for because of these
things cometh the wrath of God upon the children of disobedience. Be ye, be not ye
therefore partakers with them. For ye were sometimes darkness, but now are ye
light in the Lord. Walk as children of light. For the fruit of the Spirit is in
all goodness and righteousness and truth, proving what is acceptable unto the
Lord. And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather
reprove them. For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of
them in secret. But all things that are reproved are made manifest by the light,
for whatsoever doth make manifest is light. Wherefore he saith, "Awake thou that
sleepest, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give thee light." See then
that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time because
the days are evil. Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will
of the Lord is. And be not drunk with wine wherein is excess, but be filled
with the Spirit, speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs,
singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord. Giving thanks always for
all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives submit yourselves
unto your own husbands as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife,
even as Christ is the head of the church and he is the Savior of the body.
Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ so let the wives be to their own
husbands in everything. Husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the
church and gave himself for it. That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the
washing of water by the word. That he might present it to himself a glorious
church not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing but that it should be holy
and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that
loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh but
nourisheth and cherisheth it even as the Lord the church. For we are members of
his body of his flesh and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his
father and his mother and shall be joined unto his wife and they too shall
be one flesh. This is a great mystery but I speak concerning Christ and the
church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as
himself and the wife see that she reverence her husband. Let us pray. Dear
Heavenly Father thank you for this morning thank you for allowing us to be
at church. I thank you for the success of the marriage workshop and I pray for
this upcoming mission trip to the Philippines. Please keep the airport open
and bless the trip. Please bless now as pastor Shelley preaches his your word to
us. Please help us to have a ten of years in Jesus name. Amen. Amen. I wanted to
preach a sermon on marriage tips and kind of coming from a theme of what
we've been talking about this weekend and some people may have participated
some people have not. Even in the workshop that we recently did I didn't
necessarily get to go over a lot of the marriage tips that I had anyways and so
I think it's a great opportunity to see what the Bible says about marriage and
then I'm just gonna give some practical applications that I have drawn from the
text myself but the Bible does say in Ephesians chapter number five verse 22
wives submit yourselves under your own husbands as unto the Lord so the Bible
has instructions for wives has instructions for husbands and the Bible
does bring up marriage a lot marriage is a analogy often used in the Bible to
symbolize the Lord Jesus Christ and his relationship with the church and so
there's a lot of parallels there's a lot of symbolism that is illustrated in
marriage that also is related to how the Lord Jesus Christ is essentially
authoritarian and cares for and provides for the church itself and that's what's
being alluded to here in the book of Ephesians and so of course God is using
both for us to learn spiritual lessons and carnal realistic practical
instructions when it comes to marriage itself now I want to go back to the
beginning of the Bible go to Genesis chapter number one let's just see some
of the things what does the Bible say about marriage in regards to wives
specifically it says that they're supposed to submit as they would unto
the Lord so of course they should at least do what the Bible says let alone
what their husband says they should do what the Bible says and what the Bible
instructs men women to do in the book of Genesis here is kind of our first
instructions that we have look what it says in verse 28 the Bible says and God
blessed them and God said unto them be fruitful and multiply now of course this
takes two to tango but we understand that the wife is going to be the one
primarily dealing with the multiplication aspect in the sense that
she physiologically is gonna have to deal with multiplication much more than
the husband this is by design God is the one that created man and woman God is
the one that is making the woman's responsibility and the woman's role in
the multiplication aspect much more lengthy much more a biological reality
there's just so much more involved for the woman and so she has to take this
particular commandment this particular instruction very seriously it's also
brought up in just another chapter here look at chapter 3 verse 16 so very soon
after the Bible brings up more instructions and more information when
it comes to the woman's role in life says the verse 16 under the woman he
said I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception in sorrow thou shalt
bring forth children and thy desire shall be thy husband he shall rule over
thee so a couple things that we want to point out this was a alteration that God
made on mankind and it's a curse for the result of sin what is the two things
that's being multiplied here number one is sorrow and conception you could argue
here that the conception is in the sense that perhaps it's just gonna have more
children who's gonna have a lot of children but really when we talk about
the multiplication of thy sorrow we would think of typically the pregnancy
and the child-birthing process and it's a very painful process it's a very
difficult process there's a lot of sorrow that exists there that's why it
says you're in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children I don't think it's saying
that you're necessarily sad it's more in the sense that it's gonna be painful
it's difficult there's a lot of just physical elements to childbirth that's
not comfortable it's not a fun experience to go through that birthing
pain and it's real pain it's serious pain but that is what God has ordained
God has ordained that this would be what was going to happen and look pain in
itself is not something we enjoy no one likes pain but pain can be a very
necessary component in our lives because it alerts us to things that are
important things that are serious if women did not experience great pain during
childbirth you kind of wonder like would they take it as serious maybe they
wouldn't take it as serious maybe they wouldn't stop whatever they're doing
perhaps they wouldn't you know seek attention from either a midwife or
medical attention so by the fact that they're having such pain it kind of
alerts them to the fact that they need to take whatever is happening seriously
of course women that have birth they're gonna lose a lot of blood and so it's a
very serious you know an important situation their life is obviously gonna
be impacted by this particular event many women have died in childbirth just
because of hemorrhaging or losing a lot of blood or just lots of complications
that can happen so it is a serious event that you want to take seriously and so
pain while you may think like well I wish you could just press a button and
have no pain well if we could have no pain then women may
not take childbirth as serious as they should and it could also cause them to
put their life in jeopardy more than they would
if they were actually experiencing that pain
another element is that by delivering the child itself
they'll have contractions and these contractions are very painful but
it's a process to which they can help figure out okay this is when the child
is going to be birthed and again if you take that pain away
sometimes it can screw up a woman's ability to react
to the contractions and actually have a child
birth that is natural that's kind of the way
God had designed it and so a lot of times when people are putting themselves
on all kinds of drugs and doing all kinds of extreme things
to try and relieve themselves of this pain sometimes it can cause
ramifications or consequences by not experiencing that pain
so some people say like oh pain is bad but in many cases pain is actually very
good for you not saying that you enjoy it i'm not saying there's anything wrong
with even pain relievers in of themselves but you want to make sure
that you're not just relieving pain and not realizing there can be
consequences to it pain can be a very good thing but
obviously you know maybe god is saying it would have been painful enough to
reap all the benefits but i added a little extra spiciness to
it or something i don't know i obviously the bible is saying this
is kind of a negative thing and it is kind of similar to what the
man has to do right the man would go out and work the field
well it was kind of in this curse was making it seem like
you're going to work harder than you would have naturally
you know to produce all the crops in the field so it's a little bit of extra pain
a little bit extra toil a little bit extra sorrow in the same
way for the women there's a little bit of extra sorrow there
but there's another element to this particular verse notice it says that
the wife's desire is to her husband but it says he shall rule over thee this is
God talking to the woman and saying that the man is in charge the man is going to
rule over the woman in order to rule over someone you have to have something
it's called rules and of course what would a wife submit to anyways if we go
back to Ephesians 5 and our minds at least and think about what it had said
it was saying that the wife was to submit under her husband what is she
supposed to be submitting to it would be rules it's not that complicated but yet
our society today and Western countries today and the influence of feminism in
this world today has suggested that a man having rules for his wife or asking
his wife to submit to the rules that he has is somehow barbaric it's ancient we
need to update we need to modernize this is a unfair practice well you know what
it's so ancient it starts at the Garden of Eden with God himself saying to the
woman hey your husband is gonna rule over you and again the things that I'm
saying right now are not marriage tips these are commandments by God in the
Bible these are God's instructions so number one women would be fruitful
number two they're gonna bring forth children in sorrow number three their
husbands are gonna rule over them and I'm not gonna keep count because we're
gonna have so many more but go if it would to Proverbs chapter 31 if you
would go to Proverbs chapter 31 for a moment and we're gonna look at a lot of
other instructions that the Bible brings up about women and just their roles you
know the Bible talks about in Proverbs chapter 14 that the wise woman buildeth
her house but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands and so you know a
wise woman is gonna build her house I think you could take that literally if
you wanted I don't think that there's anything wrong with a literal
application there that a woman you know is instructed to guide the house and
she's gonna take care of it she could do things around the house to make sure
that it's in good maintenance and good working order but often when the Bible
brings up house it's also talking about children and if you think about it
you know godly women typically are more interested in having children than the
feminists of today the feminists of day are very pro-abortion they're destroying
their children they're murdering their children they're plucking down their
children and the Bible says that it's foolish to destroy your house the wise
woman will build her house the wise woman will have children and will
basically build this household that God is giving her the opportunity to have
she's not going to destroy it now in Proverbs 31 the Bible gives us in an
ideal scenario essentially the the picture-perfect virtuous woman sometimes
people will call this the Proverbs 31 woman and you know when we look at these
instructions I think what we have to do is we have to look at this as a
idealistic list this is not necessarily gonna be hey every woman's gonna be all
of this and following this checklist perfectly or something like this this is
more just an idea of what women should be striving for just like Jesus Christ
is an example for men and how they should love their wives yet none of us
are ever gonna be like Jesus Christ none of us are ever gonna have that perfect
level of love and care and provision and perfection and being a godly example and
never walk in the flesh and never be selfish obviously we're never gonna be
like that so in the same way a husband should never think like oh my wife's
just not filling out the Proverbs 31 checklist perfectly you know she's a bad
wife you know well why don't you see if you're following Jesus Christ example
perfectly you know you know it's unrealistic to sit here and try to hold
your wife to a standard that you yourself are incapable of holding it's
kind of like when the Jews were trying to get the Gentiles to follow the law
and it's like well guess what you couldn't follow the law either you guys
are saved by faith so then why wouldn't the Gentiles also be saved by faith no
one can keep the law and in the same way no one's gonna be the perfect husband
no one's gonna be the perfect wife these are just ideas to try and help us and
motivate us to do the best that we can. So I want us to have the right approach
and the right mentality when we get to this list. Now again this is not an
excuse to say oh well no one's perfect therefore I shouldn't try should be an
effort energy I shouldn't try to you know emulate this note do your best but
understand no one's gonna be perfect so we should extend grace unto our wives
whenever they're not perfect but women you should look at this list and you
should say hey these are areas where I can improve these are areas where I
should try to implement them what are some of the things that the Bible
brings up look at verse 11 the heart of her husband does safely trust in her so
that he shall have no need of spoil some men could have the idea or the
thought that if they don't make enough money their wife will leave them or
that if they're not having extra good things like if they don't have a nice
enough house if they don't have a nice enough car if they don't have the money
to go out to eat as much as they would like if she can't have the matching
purse for every outfit that she might divorce her husband or leave her
husband or even worse that maybe they do have decent money maybe he's provides
okay but just some guy comes along the way that is rich that has a lot more
money and she's tempted to leave him for someone else just because he has more
money no the Bible is saying that the proverbial woman her husband's heart
safely trusts in his wife and he knows that she's not covetous that she's not
a gold digger that she's not gonna chase after money but rather she loves her
husband more than money and that she's more interested in her husband than she
would be the things in the material things of this world that she can
possess or have and that she's not interested in material possessions but
rather she loves her husband genuinely and you know what that's really
important in today's society especially considering the fact that divorce laws
are atrocious that women can just leave their husband for virtually any reason
and women today are often divorcing their husband there's billboards and
advertisements today saying double your closet size you know divorce them now
you know take him to the bank I saw this stupid video of some woman like dancing
having like a dance party for having received her first alimony or child
support check or whatever from a divorced husband and just acting like it
was such a cool thing and she's so excited and she's like look it's got my
name on it it's like this is so stupid that's your money I mean when you're
married it was your money now it's just you're stealing from your husband and
ripping him off and ripping his heart out and just being just a total witch
and it's just it's awful it's awful it's disgusting you know what is the
proverbial woman well her heart is in her husband not in money and so then the
husband feels confident hey my heart the husband's heart feels safe and trusting
his wife and feeling like his wife's not gonna drop him like a bad habit and you
know that's an important you know thing to let your husband know that you know
hey I'm with you no matter what that's why we say for richer for poorer you
know I think everybody was pretty good with the richer part I think most women
were like look look honey if you get rich I'll stay with you okay but obviously
you know even though we laugh about that in many cases that's not true either
they get rich and like sweet now I can eject and and get a bunch of money and
leave him you know or if he's poor she's not gonna leave him high and dry look we
want women that actually love their husbands and actually care about their
husbands and so you know that's an important role verse 12 says this she
will do them good and not evil the days of her life now here's here's a
challenge for wives is maybe at some point during the day think about this
have I done anything good to my husband and notice what the Bible actually says
that she wouldn't even do any evil towards them like an evil is in the
sense of harm so you know harm is doing something that would harm him in any way
you know dragging him down hurting him hurting his feelings hurting his heart
you know attacking him just doing anything to harm him in any way the
Bible is saying the proverbial woman is only gonna do good to her husband is
never gonna do evil into him never gonna harm him never gonna afflict them in any
kind of way says in verse 13 she will do him good and not evil days her life she
seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands you know this
woman is willing to work and notice this willingly she has no bad attitude about
it and notice this with her hands so she's not she's not the type of woman
that would refuse to get her hands dirty she's not she's not a woman that would
refuse to actually do physical manual labor that she's actually willing to use
her hands to get in there and do something this also tells me that she's
skilled that she she's able to actually do things and use her why would she use
her hands because she's skilled with her hands and oftentimes it's hard to find
good work good labor and so she knows if she wants this done right she's gonna
do it herself she's gonna get her hands into that batter she's gonna get her
hands into that dough she's gonna get her hands into scrubbing whatever it is those
dishes scrubbing those clothes scrubbing the floor you know just all the
different tasks that a woman is willingly putting her hands into you
know she's putting her hand to the spindle she's putting her hand to
whatever the work that she has she's willing notice that she's willingly doing
this you know why would a woman want to do something like this because she wants
it to be done right she wants it to be a good job she's very skilled and she
likes it says in verse 14 she is like the merchant ships she bringeth her
food from afar so she's finding the best food she's not just getting well
McDonald's is two minutes away well the Wonder Bread is just right here you know
whatever it is she's not just like just trying to get just whatever she can
whatever is the easiest whatever is the most convenient this isn't the most
convenient food she bring it their food from afar this sounds like she's putting
an effort energy thinking about it bringing in the best foods maybe that's
the best deals or maybe it's the best quality it doesn't really matter but it's
essentially she's putting effort and energy into the food it's not just
what's the most convenient way to feed my family it's what's the best way to
feed my family whether that be on a budget or whether that be the quality you
know and it just depends on your family circumstances situation what that is but
it's not just hey whatever is the easiest way easy Mac I mean mac and
cheese isn't even that part of a meal and then they have easy Mac I mean like
typically you would think of like macaroni and cheese is just kind of like
a low effort meal and then it's like easy Mac they have rice and then they
have instant rice you could you could just make like ramen noodles and then
you just like microwave ramen noodles right I mean there's just there's like
such low effort that it's just kind of crazy and again if you eat easy mac
every once in a while I'm not mad at you I'm not throwing stones and hey any
meals better than no meal but at the end of the day you know this woman is not
just on a regular basis just like it's another easy mac night it's another just
like whatever's the most low effort easiest way to feed my family no she's
she's traveling afar she's bringing in whatever kind of dishes she can whatever
kind of deals she can verse 15 it says she rises also wild as yet night and
giveth meat to her household in a portion to her maidens there's a picture
of rising early she's an early riser again you got different schedules
different ideas but she's she's someone that's willing to get up early and make
a sacrifice to provide what her family needs for a meal to take care of them
says in verse 16 she consider the field and buy it that with the fruit of her
hand she planted the vineyard so you know what I kind of thought about this
in verse 16 is that she's actually smart you know people act like oh you guys
want women to be dumb or you want women to be stupid or something like this it's
like nothing could be closer or nothing can be further from the truth for me I
personally you know like my wife and was really interested my wife because she
was smart because she was very intelligent now I don't really want to
be around someone that I'm worried that she's gonna constantly burn the house
down that she's gonna just ruin ruin dinner ruin the clothes you know cause
problems with my children you know you're leaving your children alone with
your wife you you're leaving the house with the wife like this is someone that
should be smart should be wise has a lot of wisdom and not only just in the home
think about this she's considering a field and buying this is wisdom in the
business world if you think about it she's understanding the real estate
market she's understanding finance I mean these are some advanced topics when
you think about it in the business world to understand the real estate market to
understand business understand finance to understand money monetary policy you
know understanding agriculture understanding what's a good field and
not not a bad field I mean look there's many women today that are in college
today that if you said hey I need you to make a really wise agricultural real
estate purchase that they would not be someone you would want to ask for advice
on so you know all you're down on women you're down on education no I'm pro
education no I'm pro women learning things in this world and doesn't have to
be limited to housework I know some of you want to act like oh you just want
them to learn housework no I want them to learn housework but they should learn
everything they're gonna educate their children on all kinds of different
subjects all kinds of different matters this proverbial woman has studied and
learned enough to understand real estate finance business agriculture I mean these
are some advanced topics that require a lot of wisdom a lot of instruction a lot
of education and she's using that to benefit her family and you know I'm pro
women learning all kinds of things learning hobbies learning stuff you
know there's tons of women that learn how to remodel houses and they learn how
to do things as far as like building things making things fine linen I mean
look I think the sky's the limit when it comes to women you know running their
own business obviously it should be under the guise of their husband's
leadership you know this is a woman in a sense that's doing all kinds of you know
advanced things but you know I don't think she should go and work for the
man she should work for her husband and she's worked for a family she's not a
real-estate mogul she's not working for the nose okay sorry that's the Jew for
the layperson right she's working for her husband but at the end of the day you
know there's nothing wrong with women getting involved in the business world
to some degree getting involved in real estate getting involved in you know
agriculture and all these different things there's nothing wrong with that
this is the ideal woman the ideal woman is smart intelligent is
capable she's not just some you know ditz she's not just some only trophy
wife where she just you know is doing her makeup and nails in fact we never
even see that mentioned in this chapter she's willingly working with her hands
so if she was doing her nails it's probably gonna break a nail but at the
end of the day you know what she's willing to work hard for her family and
that's what men really value anyways you know you know I've never heard a guy be
like have you seen the fingernails on that one I mean I don't like you know a
couple millimeters I like the six millimeter chicks you know what I mean
no one's ever no I've never heard this we don't care it's like oh man did you
see the purple on those fingernails it really pops it looks good with her
mascara never heard this men just don't isn't it funny that it's like women do
all this stuff and men just don't care at all we don't care at all we have no
idea about it it doesn't make sense it's honestly it's almost like a
competition between women it's like women are trying to impress other women
and then at the end of the day it's like they don't even care anyways because
women just kind of are catty and they just kind of get mad at each other and
envious or whatever so it's like it's not even beneficial you know but at the
end of the day you know a husband saying like man my wife's really smart she can
help me with the real estate purchases she can do some agriculture she can
build the house she's working with her hands she's bringing food not just it's
not just the easy mac I mean she's bringing in the Italian dishes she's
making authentic Italian macaroni and cheese you know I mean it's something
like fresh I mean she grated fresh parmesan and fresh mozzarella and baked
this organic macaroni and cheese and it's like well my wife did easy mac
while she did her nails this is like well you know that's not really the
proverbial woman is it I don't like this sermon well it's because you're lazy
that's why you don't like the sermon let's keep reading it says she girdeth
her loins with strength and strengthen at their arms you know honestly you have
to admit that this woman's actually working out you know and again maybe not
in this particular context like at a gym I don't think that she's wearing no
clothes and getting a phone and putting it up against the wall and filming
herself doing minor workouts just to see whatever attention she can get online
no she's actually just laboring regularly you know look if you labor
regularly if you're carrying your kids around if you're doing this I mean it's
going to cause you to add strength to your body if you're actually doing a lot
of work she she girdeth her loins what is that it's not about her legs and then
her strength their arms this is leg day and arm day I mean this is a woman who's
putting some effort and energy and working out and look working out is
beneficial for women as well as men especially they got to give they got to
give birth to children you know having some strength in your lower body and in
your upper body is gonna be a positive thing and you know I'm pro that but I
just don't think you should be going to the gym to seek attention from other men
or online influencers is stupid says in verse 18 she perceiveth that her
merchandise is good her candle goeth not out by night so now she's rising up early
and the evening she's working now you know you could you could I think
misinterpret this I don't think that it's saying that she doesn't sleep
because you could kind of interpret this is like oh man she's like she's working
all through the night and getting up early when does she ever sleep you know
historically speaking not everybody had the incandescent light bulb so you know
you live in especially even in our area it's dark by six but obviously if you
you know past 6 p.m. you could still do some work so it's what is it saying it's
saying she doesn't just quit working at 6 p.m. or at 5 p.m. that she's still
willing to put in some effort even beyond you know when the sun goes down
she's willing to put some some work in even in the evenings so I think that a
proverbial woman could still get adequate sleep for her I mean if you go
to bed at 9 p.m. and you get eight hours sleep what time would you wake up can
anybody help me 5 a.m. I mean if you go to bed at 9 it's real easy just think
about the 9 to 12 is how many hours three so then you add five more you get
to eight you can get a full eight hours of sleep going to bed at 9 p.m. waking
up at 5 a.m. wouldn't that fit this model and what if she worked for 30 minutes or
an hour you know at 7 or 8 or you know sometime in the evening I mean that
could be a way to interpret this and I'm not saying that this is your schedule if
you have a different schedule I don't care you can do whatever you want that's
up to you but I'm just saying I'm not interpreting is saying like women should
just get no sleep we should just run them into the ground I think that
everyone should get sleep and I think you know around eight hours is a pretty
healthy lifestyle if you have more or less that's to your own discretion but
I'm just saying like I wouldn't want my wife to sit here and get three hours
of sleep or something because I'm misinterpreting these particular
passage I think that women should still get adequate sleep. Hey if you go to bed at 10
p.m. 6 a.m. there's still eight hours you go to bed at 11 7 a.m. I mean these are
still pretty reasonable you know time periods to wake up get a lot of stuff
done work put effort energy in still be healthy you know we should look at our
lives as a long run sometimes you have that sleepless night sometimes you do
have to pull an all-nighter I get it but generally speaking we should strive to
have good sleep and good rest but this woman she's willing to work in the
evenings she doesn't just give up she doesn't just quit she's willing to do
some work at night says here in verse number 19 she laid her hand to the
spindle and her hands hold the distaff so again this is similar she laid she
layeth her hands to the spindle though she's working with her hands and her
hands hold the distaff so again this is talking about her actually doing real
labor she's not just bossing everybody around some people think I just want to
be someone that bosses everybody around this woman's actually doing work with
her hands verse 20 she stretches out her hand to the poor yea she reaches for
their hands of the needy so this is someone that helps poor people she cares
about other people verse 21 she is not afraid of the snow for her household for
all her household are clothed with scarlet she make it herself coverings
of tapestry her clothing is silk and purple her husband is known in the gates
when he sit among the elders of the land so she makes sure that her family is
dressed appropriately in the sense that they're gonna be warm not only that
fashionable I mean she's not someone that's just you know you have kind of
these cultures like the Amish or the Midnight where it almost seems like they
dress ugly on purpose and you know the Bible is not really painting that
picture that Christians just have to stick out like a sore thumb because it
looks like they're wearing a horse blanket turned into a weird awkward
shaped dress and you know again some people get mad at us and say like oh man
you're trying to make women dress you know in a certain way wearing dresses
and skirts but at the end of day that's what's really fashionable anyways women
look good in dresses and skirts it's not like they look ugly and you don't have
to have ugly fabric or something like that according to the text here they're
wearing silk and purple these are quality fabrics these are expensive
coloring you know especially when we consider potentially the timing here
purple is not going to just be a common fabric that you can just easily get so
saying this woman is has their house and good clothing durable clothing clothing
is going to keep them warm she's not afraid of the snow you know some people
are afraid of the snow okay and it says hey you know if you're in church on
Sunday morning step fast you're not afraid of the snow I'm just kidding hey
she's she's got coverings of tapestry I mean this this woman is fashionable they
have durable clothing they look good this is the context and in fact her
husband I believe the implication of verse 23 is that he's well-dressed as
well I think that's what the implication is here that is basically saying like
hey everybody kind of recognized this guy because he always he always has nice
clothes durable clothes they're kind of sitting here thinking like where'd you
get that suit and it's like my wife made it you know where'd you get that shirt
my wife made it and they're kind of envious because their wife isn't making
them nice clothes their wife isn't helping them they're cold they're
freezing they don't have the nice durable clothing because their wife isn't
putting their hands in the spindle their wife's not putting their hands in the
distaff their wife's not putting in the effort and energy to make sure that
their house is taken care of so it says here in verse number 24 she make a fine
linen and sell it and deliver girdles of the merchant the Bible is explicit like
she's making the most fashionable expensive clothing and it's so nice and
people like it so much I mean they see the husband they're like hey think I can
get one of those hey you think your wife would you know make me one of those and
it's like yeah you got to go to the marketplace and you got to pay top
dollar because my wife is you gonna yeah she's gonna put in effort and energy but
she knows she knows that what she's making is expensive and so she is going
to sell and produce goods she's making money here verse 25 strength and honor
are her clothing and she shall rejoice in time to come but there's an
interesting coupling because think about it it just brought up just over and over
and over again how she makes expensive clothing the nicest clothing she's
selling the nicest clothing and notice what the text says it says strength and
honor are her clothing meaning that she's not she's not necessarily most
known for her clothing she's actually most known for her strength and honor
that you know even though fashion is something that she takes care of even
though she puts good clothes in her family that's not what makes this woman
stick out what makes this woman stick out is her strength and her honor that's
what makes this particular woman stick out because she's not interested in
showing off everybody you know because of her clothing she's showing off
because of her character because of who she is now when I read this text it
always makes me think of a movie I've seen this movie it's called gladiator I
don't know if you've seen this movie not even this I like the movie I'll be
honest but you watch it at your own discretion but it's funny because the
Roman soldiers when they go around like this is their battle cry they all walk
them they're like strength and honor you know there's like strength and honor you
know it's just it's kind of funny it's like this is the Bible you know and it's
like hey the proverbial woman she's like strength and honor you know and hey
that's her clothing right and you know it's it's really to show that it's
important for women to also have a level of strength and a level of honor a level
of respect what is what is a woman having honor gonna look like well it's a
woman that works hard it's a woman that loves her husband it's a woman that's
taking care of her family and is respectful and positive she's only doing
good to her husband that's a woman that everyone's gonna look at and say man
she's a great woman people are gonna have respect under that woman when you
see the women of today that are whores and hookers and cheat on their husband
and take their husband to the cleaners people aren't looking at that woman like
this is a very respectable woman they're very honorable woman a woman that's not
willing to work a woman that's not very smart a woman that's not adding strength
is not someone they're gonna look to and say man this is someone that's got a lot
of honor a lot of respect you know this is a woman that's gonna be respected is
the woman that's actually serving her husband and serving her family and
working hard and using her hands and using her intelligence and using all
the God-given abilities that she's been granted even even today's world most
people kind of scorn the boss babe the boss woman the Karens of this world I
mean why do we even have this the the word the proverb the byword of Karen
there's nothing wrong with the name I mean it's even in the Bible you have a woman
named Karen it's Job's daughter spell a little off you know it's K-E-R-E-N
Karen Hapik but why is Karen such a proverb today because Karen's annoying
Karen goes in and complains to everyone Karen's just tearing people down Karen's
just kind of this boss babe loudmouth feminist woman who wouldn't ever do
anything to help anybody else won't suffer any kind of evil or won't suffer
any kind of harm won't allow herself to be defrauded she has to just go around
and nag everybody and complain and then I get kept in my dollars right even
though she's just kind of just an annoying nag and everybody just looks at
her and you're just like there's no honor there there's no respect there we
don't have respect for them when I respect for the apartment manager coming
around bossing us and acting like a little chihuahua just it's like go back
to your little office no one cares call the cops please I mean they're just so
annoying you're just like I'd rather be arrested than have to listen to you for
five more seconds because you're just so annoying but you know this proverbial
woman she's someone that everybody looks up to everybody likes everybody wants
to be around everybody wants her goods everybody wants her cookies everybody
wants her dinner everybody wants the clothes that their family has everybody
wants to be around her everybody wants to be her friend everybody wants to go to
her parties everybody wants her to be the one that she's looking to to help out
if they're in need I mean this is the type of woman because she has strength
and honor and the strength is that she's trusting in God and she's trusting in
what the Lord says and she's just doing what the Bible says she's physically
strong she's mentally strong she's emotionally strong she's financially
strong I mean she's not gonna get ripped off by the used car salesman
because she's smart enough to know hey I'm in the business world I know how to
wheel and deal I know it's a good deal I know it's good merchandise I'm going and
I'm traveling I'm getting my food from afar I mean this woman's got some smarts
this woman's not gonna be easily taken advantage of this woman is gonna be well
dressed but you know what at the end of the day we're not sitting here and
ooh-ing and ah-ing over the clothing we're ooh-ing and ah-ing over the person
that made the clothing over this woman because of the strength and the honor
that she has that's what the Bible says that's her clothing and she shall
rejoice in time to come meaning you put in the effort you put in the energy you
do what's right you're a godly woman you you love your husband you love your
family you work really hard eventually you're gonna earn a lot of respect a
lot of people are gonna look up to you a lot of people are gonna like you a lot
of people are gonna want to be your friend that is what the Bible is
basically insinuating here but you know what you have to trust that this is the
right way to live your life if we keep reading it says she openness her mouth
with wisdom and in her tongue is the law of kindness again adding to the fact
hey we love women to be smart we love women to be wise of course wise is gonna
be biblical wisdom never gonna have wisdom if you're not doing what the
Bible says the wisdom is coming from the Word of God but notice that she has a
law her law is of kindness it says in her tongue is the law of kindness what
would be the opposite a gossip a tale bearer someone who slanders honestly
the true the true opposite would be the slanderer and the Bible forbids you
know the deacons wife and of course will be implied as the pastor's wife from
being a slanderer because that's the worst thing you could have in a woman is
when going around spreading lies about other people gossiping about other
people tale bearing about other people saying negative things about other
people you know the proverbial woman she has a law she's made a rule for herself
I'm only gonna say kind things I'm gonna be kind to people I'm gonna be kind
about other people and look you're gonna be kind about ladies that you maybe don't
even like about people you don't even like that much you just have a law and
of course isn't that the old adage of hey your mom used to say if you have
nothing nice to say then don't say anything at all isn't that the old adage
that's coming from a proverbial idea here that's saying hey this woman has a
law for herself she's regulating herself hey I'm only gonna be kind and you know
I think that that's a great attribute that women should really seek to control
their tongues and think about what they're saying and say you know what is
this a kind thing to say it's not well then I'm gonna regulate myself and I'm
not gonna say it I am gonna have a law here I'm gonna keep my tongue in check
and my law is that I'm only gonna be kind says in verse 27 she look as well
the ways of her household and eateth not the bread of idleness again you know
this is not the stale bread this is not the cheap bread this is the this is bread
that hey what's effort energy time attention in and look a lot of people
are eating the bread of idleness today because unfortunately they're their wife
is just not looking well to their ways and so they have to eat kind of a cheap
bread you know bread that says is devoid of nutrients devoid of any kind of
effort or energy you know I would think like the almost the opposite of a bread
of idleness would be like the croissant because if you know you think about like
if you ever understood how hard it is to make a croissant it's just like
intense the amount of time effort and energy put into a croissant you cannot
eat a croissant you know that someone started preparing a few minutes ago or
five minutes ago or a few hours ago I mean it's like a like a whole day like I
think it takes like a whole day take a long time and look honestly even within
croissants not all croissants are equal you know the croissant at the Walmart
bakery is not the same as if you go to like a good French bakery you know
there's a huge variation there between these two items why because there's a
difference in the bread quality why because more effort and energy was
applied in one scenario we all know you're like hey I really like this bread
why because there's more effort and energy put into that bread the cheap
bread tastes like cheap bread and the expensive really good bread tastes that
way for reason because of the time effort energy put into it and again this
is just an just a straightforward obvious application of this verse we
could expand that to anything the cheap bread the good tortilla versus the bad
tortilla the good pasta versus the bad pasta because these are also grain type
products we could expand this beyond just literal grain and we could go to
any kind of meal any kind of food any kind of beverage any kind of item hey
this woman is not someone that's lazy she puts effort and energy and you know
I've said this about people but I said there's there's two kinds of people in
this world there's people who eat to thrive to survive and there's people
that eat to thrive and you know what this woman eats to thrive and you know
what I like being around those kind of people and hey we all have to eat so
some people eat to survive but often they're eating the bread of idleness
their meals are just not that good they don't even enjoy food you know you're
around people and you're like hey do you like spaghetti they're like I hate
spaghetti why because they've had crappy spaghetti you know if you have good
spaghetti it's awesome you know it's like I don't like pizza maybe you only
had crappy pizza it's like I don't like steak I've only had crappy steak you
know for people that don't live in Texas sometimes they're like I don't like
brisket and you're like oh well why don't you try Texas brisket and you're
like what's the difference that is not it's not the brisket of idleness okay
and look if you've ever tried to make a brisket Texas style it is not an idle
task it is a lot of effort a lot of energy put into that particular meat is
why it tastes good and if you neglect it if you're if you're lazy if you don't
put a lot of time and effort and energy into it it won't be very good brisket is
a very tough meat by itself and so if you don't actually put a lot of effort
energy it won't taste very good it could be chewy it could just be kind of like
tough it could be dried out I mean there's so many elements that could
ruin that particular meat so it takes a lot of careful attention and paying
you know close watch while you're cooking it and having skill for it to
come out and taste really really good but you know what I like this woman that
says you know what my household is not just gonna eat to survive we're gonna
eat the thrive says here in verse 27 she look at well the ways of her household
right verse 28 her children rise up and call her blessed her husband also and he
praises her many daughters have done virtuously but thou exalts them all
favor is deceitful and beauty is vain but a woman that fear the Lord she shall be
praised give her of the fruit of her hands and let her own works praise her
in the gates so you know kind of just clumping these last ones together notice
that she fears God and she works hard that's what's being brought up I think
also it's important to think about this says favors deceitful and beauties of
fame any woman can be the proverbial woman not everybody can be beautiful
beauty is just in many cases your genetics in some cases people talk about
this quote looks maxing and stuff but honestly you know plastic surgery can
only go so far anyways and most of the time when people go down the plastic
surgery route it's just kind of like AI slop you know what I mean that you can
kind of tell and unfortunately it's like even if someone did it moderation is
necessary because the people when they start getting into the like five six
seven surgeries dozens of surgeries I mean some people have 50 surgeries you
just kind of start thinking like wow you look like a freak you know you just look
weird you look like an alien it doesn't get better it only kind of seems to get
worse in a sense now obviously if someone had a major you know cosmetic
defect with their with their body or their face or they're injured and they
have you know maybe burns or they had some kind of an injury and they have
some kind of a cosmetic surgery or plastic surgery look I don't even think
that's wrong I don't think there's anything wrong in general with the idea
or the concept of plastic surgery but if you're just trying to become beautiful
apart from how God actually made you you know that that to me it's really vain
quickly and the Bible doesn't say that this woman has to be beautiful it says
that she works hard says strength and honor her clothing it's talking about
someone that fears the Lord you know she's gonna be praised for being a
godly woman and you know at the end of the day you know I think that beauty is
an eye-to-the-holder a little bit anyways we should we should stop worrying
so much about these vain things about being so beautiful and being so
attract I mean most of the quote beautiful people in this world are
some of those rotten people in the world you look at the Hollywood celebrities
and the fashion moguls and icons and all the people that people are putting on
magazines and stuff if you're actually around these people in real life you
would you would just be so appalled by their behavior by their character you
know when they actually took their makeup off you'd be like oh wow well
that's not it's not even really what you look like I mean with Photoshop with AI
with all this like even when you look at the magazine that's not even what they
look like it's fake it's not even a real thing like what you're seeing you would
only see on the magazine you would not see this in real life that's not to say
there aren't some people though that are just obviously very attractive even in
real life you're around them they have a magnetic personality they're fun the
charismatic you know at the end of the day that's not what's important you know
it's important someone that fears God and someone that actually wants to work
hard why because that favor is deceitful because if you're getting favor for just
being attractive you may gain favor from the wrong kind of people you may be
flattered by the wrong kind of people you won't have sincere genuine friends
and you'll end up also getting a bad idea of what real life is like and how
God wants you to use your your body to serve him and so you know instead of
worrying about being so beautiful and being so attractive you know you should
be more interested in just serving God with your wife you know and as a wife
you already got you already got a guy you know you don't need to sit here and
get attention from other men you know to me a woman should her appearance should
only be in basically you know whatever she's doing should only be in the
context of what her husband wants what does my husband like what does my
husband want me to do how does my husband want me to appear that to be
the only person that she's really seeking the attention from again I'm not
saying that you shouldn't try to you know present yourself well be healthy
groom yourself use hygiene do your hair do whatever that's I'm sure you should
but you should do it for what your husband wants and to get the attention
of your husband not for anybody else because the rest of it is just vain it's
not beneficial it doesn't help the Bible literally just says beauty is vain
it's gonna be like oh man I wasn't born beautiful well you know what God says it
didn't matter anyways there's not there's not it's not a beauty pageant up
in heaven there's not people getting an extra special crown in heaven for having
been beautiful and in fact in many cases being beautiful will probably make it
harder on you to want to serve God it'll make it harder on you to make the right
decisions in some cases just kind of like the rich man the rich person has a
harder time trying to serve God because of the temptation of just living a life
of pleasure and spending his money and doing whatever whereas the people that
are poor broke or ugly it's easier for them to serve God in some senses so you
know what if you're ugly and not serving God you better serve God okay you don't
have any excuse but hey even if you're attractive even if you're good-looking
you know what it's meaningless anyways serve God let's go to some more verses
I want to go to some more places go to Titus chapter 2 you know we're talking
about marriage tips I'm really trying to focus on just what the Bible says on
this you know and and really all I've been saying is what the Bible is saying
I want to give some practical applications as well here at a moment
but you know to me it's more important to just focus on what the text actually
says I think that most people unfortunately are not preaching what the
text says I think many churches today are neglecting to say what the church
what just the Bible says because it's so countercultural to what feminism is
teaching it's so countercultural to what a lot of women are seeking after today
they spend they're spending almost all their time on vanity on fashion on just
beauty and accessories and shopping and all this stuff that if you actually just
said what the Bible says they'd be many of them would feel it reproached they
would feel embarrassed they think like oh man you know you just want me to just
serve my husband that's my life yeah exactly but that's not just my opinion
that's the Bible's opinion that's what the Bible is clearly saying Titus
chapter 2 verse 3 the aged women likewise that they be in behavior as
becomeeth holiness not false accusers not given to much wine teachers of good
things that they may teach the young women to be sober to love their
husbands to love their children to be discreet chased keepers at home good
obedient to their own husbands that the word of God be not blasphemed so if you
want to have a successful marriage you need to embrace your role as a wife if
you're married you need to embrace your role as a wife if you don't embrace
these roles you're gonna have a rough and a rocky marriage you're gonna have a
hard time enjoying your marriage when you're just not doing what God has
designed you to do just like anything anything you pull out of the box if you
don't follow the instructions it's not gonna go well it's not gonna work the
way you want it God made women to function in a particular environment in
a particular way now of course can I take something that was designed to do
something and use it to do something completely different yeah absolutely I
can I can I can take anything that's designed to meet a specific criterion and
just do whatever I want in fact people do this all the time people will take
weird construction materials and they'll use them in ways that they shouldn't be
used and it'll it'll work but is that the best way to make it work not
necessarily I mean you'll see people taking like flooring tile and they'll
put it on the ceiling and you're like well that's weird you know they'll take
certain construction materials that you know like duct tape I mean what is even
duct tape made for I don't know but it's just like a fix all but people put
duct tape on their car now again maybe you just have to right I've had to use
twisty ties on my car because it's like the bottoms like falling out and you
just kind of have to twisty tie this thing together and you just kind of have
to MacGyver it and make it work but at the end of the day is that gonna be the
best way to use that particular thing no that may not be the best way to use a
particular item and the same way that a woman is like okay a woman is supposed
to be guiding the house she's supposed to be this multitasking individual she's
supposed to you know do all these different tasks with children couldn't I
say oh well she could be good daycare worker because there's a lot of overlap
she could be good in the public school system she could be a nurse she could be
in real estate in real estate as a realtor yeah all those things have
overlaps and some of these biblical things but it's not gonna work as
well it's not gonna be the way that God had designed it in the same way hey you
can take some kind of a heavy machinery you could take something that's gonna
take a lot of voltage and a lot of amps and plug it into one of these sockets
and it might work but if you start really revving the engine it's gonna
blow the circuit because maybe the wiring is not made to handle that kind
of amperage and the same way you put women in the business world they're
probably not designed to do that and you're gonna have problems you're gonna
have problems in the marriage you're gonna have problems in society you're
gonna have an increase in adultery you're gonna have an increase in women
taking birth control you're gonna have an increase in just women being upset
having to go out and work a job then come home and do the household duties
well now she's tired now she doesn't want to do it now she can't focus on it
now it's like okay now it's easy Mac and then the man gets mad because he comes
home now he's getting easy Mac it's like when you just get out of sync with all
these biblical roles well then you're causing yourself problems if you're not
going to keep your wife at home guiding the house raising children you're just
asking for problems well I want my wife to be in the house but no children you
know Hollywood celebrities will try this they'll have they'll have their wife no
kids she just helped me they're rich they have money so then guess what the
woman just has plenty of time on her hands so what does she do she gets a
male trainer bad idea do you not get your wife a male trainer just ask Tom
Brady about that but you know you don't want to give yourself all this time hey
what if she was pregnant with kids at home you know cooking cleaning she
doesn't have time for this male trainer or whatever you know and so at the end
of the day God has designed all these things on purpose for a reason you just
got to embrace your role and it's gonna be the best path forward says here that
they're supposed to be a keeper at home that's not my personal opinion that's
just what the Bible says now I want to give you a few tips that I had written
down these are just applications so everything that I have said is just a
is just a commandment of the Bible it's a biblical principle the Bible is what
God said now I'm going to take this and apply things and have my own personal
applications and ideas based on those biblical principles so number one I
wanted to say is that being a wife if you're married if you're a wife being a
wife should be your top priority it is the most important human relationship
you will have being a wife to your husband and you should not prioritize
your family children chores or any of your personal goals above your husband
you should you should make being a wife number one
okay that doesn't mean that there isn't gonna be days times events where there's
an overlap right hey the kids are throwing up and sick well maybe the
wife's giving more attention to the kid that day than her husband specifically
but as a general rule you should be there prioritizing your husband and
being a wife number one over any of the other things that you have number two
you should not brag about other men I mean how can your husband's heart be
safely trusting in you when you're bragging about other men just do don't
talk positively about other men or brag about other men that's that's you're
gonna lose honor and respect when you do something like that you know there's a
lot of women that I've grown up with and been around in my life where they all
have these like celebrity crushes and it's like you're around them and they
just can't oh Tom Cruise he's like five seven you wouldn't he and you're over
33 he's not interested in you anymore anyways and you know they're like oh
well Johnny Depp Johnny Depp's a freak he's a weirdo do you really want a guy
in mascara you know they're interested in some some dude Keanu Reeves he's a
faggot you know most of these guys are fags anyways let alone but you know what
it's not appropriate you shouldn't be sitting here just ugu and gaga over some
other guy make your husband the guy that you brag about make your husband your
celebrity crush make your husband the guy that you're really interested in
number three boost your husband don't tear him down that's based on the
principle we talked about that you do good and not evil all the days of your
life number four make your husband feel important make him feel like a king
instead of constantly nagging and complaining about your husband you
should make him feel important and respected that's what it says in
Ephesians 5 we write earlier keep the home environment pleasant number five
keep the home environment pleasant make it where he wants to actually be there
and you'll spend more time there number six let your husband know that you love
him you should be constantly telling your husband that you love him and
giving him affection we could see that principle brought up in Song of Solomon
repeatedly number seven spend time with him regularly you need to spend a lot of
time with your spouse you know distance makes the heart grow fonder but only for
a time you know there's a time window where you're apart and it makes you
really want to be around them but you could be apart for so long that it ends
up having a negative effect you need to be spending regular time with your
spouse number eight be interested in his activities you know whatever your
husband likes be interested in those things learn about them like them you
know whether that be sports whether it be hobbies whether that be just side
interest whether it be his job career just any of the things that he likes be
interested in those things number nine always submit to your husband so
whatever he says goes obviously the only exception will be he's telling you to
sin number 11 dress the way he wants that's that's a great idea and a really
practical tip you know instead of thinking about how you want to dress for
yourself why don't you dress the way he would want you to dress number 12 talk
to him very frankly about his needs you know I think that in today's society a
lot of women are complaining about their needs and marriage and they're never
bringing up what does my husband need what does my husband want number 13 be a
good conversationalist and a listener now I think most women are probably good at
conversation but how about listening you know listen to what your husband's
saying listen to what your husband wants listen to what your husband is thinking
number 14 don't forget to be romantic and flirt your husband really is gonna
appreciate this you know what what's the opposite of the nag it's the romance
the romantic and the flirting it's being you know interested in him number 15 be
very frugal financially we see that the woman in the Proverbs was very frugal
she's she's making her own money she's considering the field before so much
so she's thinking about the price of these goods she's getting her food from
afar so obviously she's thinking about things financially and not being a
spendthrift not wasting money on stupid stuff number 16 never criticize his
family you know you should just avoid you know being negative about his family
obviously if y'all are having a frank conversation you can but you shouldn't
just be criticizing them just bringing that up use the law of kindness use the
for your tongue the law of kindness number 17 never criticize your husband
to others this should just be always the case just don't ever criticize them to
other people if you have a problem with your husband you can tell two people
Jesus and your husband okay don't tell other people about it don't bring it up
it doesn't make you look good you lose honor and respect from that honestly I'd
even say this even if there was a guy that wanted to be a pastor someday but
his wife criticizes him and I know that about about them I would never ordain
him this is such a negative horrific thing you should never be criticizing
your husband in public when it says here I'm sorry this is just my list but
another one is number 18 encourage him to lead spiritually constantly encourage
him to do this number 19 a right arrange deep privately with your husband often
you know it could be late night eating with you know the kids earlier and then
eating later with him or just putting them in different room that's always a
good idea number 20 make kids be silent at dinner at times to enjoy conversation
with husband you know this could be a good idea even if you're there with the
table sometimes you could just have them be quiet eat their dinner so you can
talk you can have a good conversation with your husband number 21 have fun
together maybe get a new hobby exercise walk play a game talk to each other
number 22 do not boss your husband at all don't tell him what to do around the
house courteously lovingly and kindly ask him for health but do not order boss
or nag him so we need something very courteous about it and ask him politely
number 23 do not take the children's side stay together and discipline so if
you don't like how your husband discipline the children do not disagree
with him publicly in front of the children go to him privately and talk
to him about that if you feel like it's necessary to say something number 24 if
your husband has been unfaithful in the past but as repented never bring up the
past again so just as God forgives our sins and lets us live things down you
should let your husband live things down now of course if you have if you're an
accountability partner for your spouse please continue to do that but don't rub
his nose in his own past don't bring those things up allow him to live that
stuff down number 25 do not make friends with other men and guard yourself and
feelings for other men you know we can all pick up feelings for any other
person and so you should be careful not to just be around other people thinking
about other people you know getting too close to other people because you could
always start to catch feelings and you know what you know you don't catch
feelings for other people you don't allow yourself to catch feelings for
other people you just stay away from them don't get to know them that much
just just keep yourself away from that number 26 plan to be home when your
husband is at home and number 27 don't be preoccupied with duties or chores
when your husband is home let's go to Ephesians 5 so I spent a lot of time on
the ladies there and you know I'm not gonna spend that much time I'm just
gonna say a few things about the the husbands and we'll finish but Ephesians
5 says verse 23 for the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the
head of the church and he's the Savior of the body therefore as the church is
subject unto Christ so let their wives be to their own husbands and everything
husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself
for it that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by
the word that he might present it to himself a glorious church not having
spot or wrinkle or any such thing whether that it should be holy and
without blemish so what men to love their wives is their own bodies he that
love of his wife love of themself for no man ever yet hated his own flesh but
nourish it and cherish it even as the Lord the church for we are members of
his body and of his flesh and of his bones so the Bible is telling us that we
should love our wives as we love ourselves as our own flesh we should
nourish them and cherish them you know the Bible brings up in Song of Solomon
the husband constantly complimenting his wife you know this would be a picture of
loving her constantly praising her telling her that she's beautiful telling
her you know all the things you like about her saying nice things the Bible
talks about how in Song of Solomon that the husband's saying that his heart has
been ravished with his wife and the Bible warns in the book of Proverbs
chapter 5 that you should always be ravished with your wife and that you
shouldn't be you know embracing the bosom of a stranger and so you know in
the same vein that wives should not quote be fantasizing about their
celebrity crush men should also not do the same it's despicable and gross and
disgusting how men will have posters of other women in their house or in their
garage or in their man cave or at their work or whatever that's disgusting and
gross and it's not real it's fake those women would never be interested in you
anyways it's stupid it's wicked they should not do that you should be
ravished with your wife and you should love your wife okay another thing the
Bible brings up in Song of Solomon is men dating their wives and taking them
out taking them to the banqueting house comforting them with apples and
flagons of wine and just showing all kinds of affection and doting on them
men should be treating their wives like this not just dates their wives like
this oh well that's not cool that's not manly no you're an idiot if you think
men should be cold harsh or dark to their wives okay and again just because
you're in charge doesn't mean you should be a crappy husband now look if you are
married to someone that's that's not a very good husband yeah you should still
obey him you should still do what's right that's what 1st Peter chapter number 3
says you just don't win them over with your good conversation but at the end of
the day you know this is not an excuse for men to be rude to their wives harsh
with their wives you know selfish with their wives men should be selfless they
should provide they should cherish they should nourish they should be kind they
should be affectionate they should date their wives you know these are very
important principles they should be thinking about their wives on a regular
basis then you spend time with their wives then you talk with their wives so
I just have a few practical tips that I wanted to share and then we'll we'll
wrap up number one men should love their wife and let her know it you know I
think for men it's more difficult to probably communicate or to say things
like this but men should be very expressive verbally and telling their
wives positive things letting them know that they love them my dad was very good
example in this and he would constantly praise my mom and tell her that he
loved her and and tell her that she was beautiful and it was very important to
her so I obviously picked up on that but the Bible brings that up a lot number
two is be thoughtful and expressive to your wife bring her flowers perfume and
gifts again obviously this is you know to your discretion to your budget
whatever but I think from time to time yeah you should do it on her you should
do kind things for her she likes them get her whatever flowers she likes you
know for some reason you know me and my wife have a different opinion sometimes
on flowers and stuff I think at times past I would get her a lot of perfume
now she doesn't really like a lot of perfume especially being pregnant she's
highly sensitive to perfumes and like strong sense so obviously just whatever
your wife likes though you know whatever simple gifts things that you can give to
her number three is be gentle in all your dealings and never be harsh or
physically abusive you should never do those things you nourish and cherish
your wife number four you should assume your place of leadership in the home so
you should be a leader a decision-maker and sometimes your decision-making even
though you're in charge you don't always have to make the decision of what you
want just because you're in charge you can still make a decision and say you
know what this is what we're gonna do as a family and it's not really what I
wanted it's kind of what my wife wanted but I want us to make that decision
because I want to please my wife or I want to please my children or I want to
do something now there's gonna be other times where you say my wife wants me to
do this but I don't think that's good for a family and so we're not gonna do
that and you're gonna make an unpopular decision and then she has to submit but
it should work both ways men should be making unpopular decisions at times and
then they should be making selfish or selfless you know sacrificing decisions
that are like I don't really want to do this but I'm willing to do this to
please my wife or to do good unto her number five never brag about another
woman hopefully you're smart enough to never do this this is stupid never ever
do this okay just just don't even talk about other women number six always keep
your appointments with your wife and if you can't keep an appointment call her
or text her immediately and let her know you're gonna be late or plans have
changed number seven always come home from work at the time expected if not
call or text and let her know you should be respectful to your wife and and treat
her with respect number eight keep your relationship sacred it should be
special between you and her don't reveal it to others there should be a lot of
things that only the husband and wife know about each other things that you do
things that are just between y'all you should have inside jokes whatever it is
keep that special keep that sacred between y'all number nine eat alone with
your wife when you can once a week is a good idea number ten have fun with your
wife whether that be some kind of a hobby activity game etc you know in some
cases I brought this up on the flip side for the women sometimes you might have a
couple of these one that she's really into and one that you're really into and
you're just kind of compromising and alternating and like hey let's do this
one because I like it and then we'll do that one because you like it we'll
alternate we'll switch and you can kind of just enjoy each other's company while
you allow your spouse to have a lot of fun number 11 lead in spiritual
activities pray for the family lead in devotions take your family to church
very important to be the person that's deciding these things and as a man
you're less emotional so it should be easier for to be like hey we're just
gonna go to church hey we're just gonna you know read the Bible we're gonna have
this spiritual time we're gonna pray you know whatever you need to do you can
make that decision number 12 be pleasant at home to be don't don't come home and
kick the dog and yell at everybody and just be kind of a jerk and again I'm
not telling you what to do you can do whatever you want but you know try you
don't have to necessarily belch and fart and be gross all the time either you
know sometimes you can have a little bit of you know decorum even in the home and
try to you know be respectful now look if you want to do that and y'all have fun
and y'all are gonna you know belch in each other's faces go for it you can do
whatever you want I'm just saying that hey it might be a good idea to still
try to be pleasant at home as well I don't want you to not be comfortable but
try to be the best version of your comfortable all right number 13 go
shopping together now I hate this one but I said it all right enjoy the small
things in life have a good attitude you know why do I even do that because my
wife loves it you know my wife loves us to go out shop sometimes we just window
shop and that's the best okay I at least appreciate that right number 14
never criticize your in-laws that's a difficult one sometimes but you know hey
you know if even if you have great in-laws and the temptation is there to
want to say something negative just just bite your tongue number 15 make sure to
show her due benevolence and meet her needs as well so you know sometimes
people think of this is only like let's make sure the man's needs are met but
you know women you should talk to them as well talk to your wife see what she
wants and make sure she's getting her needs met too 16 help in the household
duties when you can 17 be interested in your wife's daily activities yeah listen
to all the weird stuff the kids did and pay attention 18 do not side with the
children against your wife so even if your wife disciplines the kids and you
don't like it try to communicate that privately don't allow your kids to see
you guys not united number 19 if your wife has been unfaithful in the past but
repented don't bring it up again again you should you know enforce
accountability standards for your partner but allow them to live it down
number 20 don't make friends with other women and keep away from any feelings
for another person if you're starting to get feelings for someone or you feel
like it is a person that you kind of like a little bit too much you know stay
away from especially in the workplace you know just avoid them stay away from
them try to work with other people you know just whatever you can if someone
were causing you a lot of problems you know think about Potiphar's wife was
coming pretty strong on Joseph you know he can't get another job maybe just get
another job I mean if you were really in that kind of a precarious work scenario
or work situation move departments move locations get another job because it's
just not worth it to go down this road or to get entangled in that kind of an
affair you know or adultery you don't want to do that stay away from them get
a job where women don't work you know that maybe that's a good idea 21 give
your wife an allowance and spending money she likes you would say amen you
know if she could but hey give her some money 22 read books and educate yourself
and the family and then number 23 be present with your wife and don't allow
yourself to be distracted you know that one's a hard one for all of us
especially with a phone these days you know it's really easy to not give all
of your attention to your wife or all of your attention to your family and you
know it really takes away I could spend five hours with my wife distracted on my
phone kind of doing other things and to her it'll feel like I gave her zero time
in fact it might even be negative whereas if I gave her maybe an hour
really dedicated that could be more powerful and more you know pleasing to
her than a longer period of time that's distracted so really think about being
purposeful in your interactions with your wife giving her attention giving
your focus because when you do this it makes her feel important when you're
giving other things your attention you're distracted she just doesn't feel
like she's she's worth your time she's worth your respect she's worth your
attention and just makes people feel you know uncomfortable it makes the wife
feel like she's not as loved as cherished so you know make sure to figure
out a way to give them that time and affection now let's read verse 33 and
we'll finish verse 32 as well this is a great mystery by speak concerning Christ
in the church nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife
even as himself and the wife see that she reverends her husband these are
important biblical principles that we've read in the Bible I was trying to give
some practical applications and tips as well but it's for sure just men need to
really love their wives and wives need to really obey and submit and respect
their husbands these this is crucial to having a really good marriage and the
more you do those things the better you're gonna be off though the less you
love and the less you respect the more problems you're gonna cause it's goes
in prayer thank you heavenly father so much for these instructions thank you
so much for Jesus Christ setting such a great example unto us I pray that you
would help husbands to love their wives and be good leaders and provide for them
and give them the attention and the focus that they deserve and I pray that
you would help wives to respect and honor and obey their husbands even when
they're not perfect even if they don't deserve it and I pray you just help us
to love our husband or a wife the way that you would love us and that you would
continue to allow us to serve you faithfully by having great marriages in
Jesus name we pray amen so that will go to our final song 325 in our hymnal
song 325 expect the ladies to sing out nice and loud trust and obey when we
walk with the Lord in the might of his word
one more chance for me of life in the name of Jesus
you're dismissed