All right, well we're here in Proverbs chapter number five. I want to start reading in verse 18
The bible says let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of thy youth
Titled my sermon this morning is rejoice with the wife of thy
Youth now this verse right here is being directed obviously towards a young man
And i'll prove that go to proverbs chapter number one just flip back a few pages
And we'll get the context of who the book of proverbs is really directed to
Proverbs chapter one look at verse one
It says the proverbs of solomon the son of david king of israel to know wisdom and instruction
To perceive the words of understanding to receive the instruction of wisdom justice and judgment and equity
To give subtlety to the simple notice this to the young man
knowledge and
Discretion now, of course the book of proverbs can be applied to all of us
But who primarily the messages of the book of proverbs is being directed to is towards young men
There's a lot of great wisdom and advice
Towards young men and here in proverbs 5 verse 18. The bible's telling us to rejoice
With the wife of thy youth. I think there's several lessons we can learn from this verse this morning
Number one go back to proverbs 5 and keep your place there throughout the sermon number one
Getting married young is a virtue getting married young is a virtue
This is an idea that's definitely attacked in our society today
But notice again what the bible says in verse number 18. Let thy fountain be blessed
And rejoice with the wife of thy youth. So here the bible is actually saying that
Having a wife in your youth is actually a good thing and we should rejoice with the wife of our youth
We should not believe this mentality that the world pushes that well
You need to wait to get married until you're 35 until you've already gone to college
You've already paid off all your debt. You've already got a career. You've got a savings of a hundred thousand dollars in the bank
Then you can get married. You know, that's not a biblical mentality at all
That's maybe what the world teaches but that's not what the bible teaches
Go to first simothy chapter number five and like I said keep your place there throughout the sermon
But like I said, there's many virtues. There's many benefits to getting married at a young age
One of those is that getting married young helps men to grow up. Let me just tell you something about young men
They're just stupid. Okay, they're foolish
There's a lot of immaturity when it comes to young men
And one of the things that helps young men to grow up in life is to get married
Why because something's going to change in their life?
Regarding the amount of responsibility that they carry see when you're living at home with mom and dad
You have little to no responsibility in life
Yeah, you might have to take out the trash
You might have to mow the lawn, but really you're pretty much just doing whatever you want
You're staying up all night playing video games. You're waking up whenever you feel like, you know, you're just doing you're on your own program
But something changes when you get married look at first simothy 5-8
But if any provide not for his own
And especially for those of his own house, he have denied the faith and is worse than an infidel
So notice the bible is teaching here that it's a man's job to provide financially for his family
And if a man doesn't do that, the bible says that he's worse than an infidel saying he's worse than someone that's not even saved
and so when you go from being a young single guy or a guy living in his parents house and you're
Staying up all night playing video games. You're just doing whatever you want to do
And all of a sudden you get married. Well, there's going to be a lot of maturity that has to take place
Why because now you're going to have to get up at 5 30 in the morning
Monday through friday and that's going to be a huge change in your life compared to what you were doing before
You know, that's going to do it's going to cause you to grow up
Why because you're not going to be able to stay up till midnight anymore playing xbox?
You're not going to stay up till two or three in the morning playing playstation
You're actually going to have to go to bed at a reasonable time
Why because you've got work in the morning why because you've got a wife that you need to take care of
And young men are just so naturally immature and irresponsible
And I think that the reason why god gave us a wife why god gave us the institution of marriage is to help
Men grow up help men to mature go to first grand theans chapter number 13 first grand theans chapter number 13
Now today what we see as the norm in america is we see men just prolonging adolescence
Into their 20s into their 30s into their 40s
We see men living in their 40s 30s like they were when they were teenagers playing video games all night
Not taking life seriously not having a steady serious job
I mean I see these videos online where women are like just excited if they talk to a guy that just has a job
And it's like the bar is pretty low right now guys
Like just have a job and a lot of women will be impressed by you not even like you have to go be an engineer
Or something crazy like just a job a lot of women are like wow this guy's awesome
Look at first Corinthians 13 verse 11. It says when I was a child I spake as a child
I understood as a child. I thought as a child, but when I became a man I put away
Childish things, you know, what is the definition of a man?
Well, here's one of the definitions of a man is someone that has put away
Childish things you see being a man is not necessarily an age that you've reached
You don't just become a man when you turn 18. No you become a man when you put away
Childish things out of your life
And you know what you could be very young and be a man if you're responsible if you get married young and you take life
Seriously, and you provide for your family
You know what you are a man, but we have guys into their 40s that don't have a wife. They don't have kids
They don't have any responsibilities. They're renting still into their 40s and 50s. They're not getting a serious job
But you know what they do a lot. They're really good at video games man
They have such a high rank in World of Warcraft. They've collected all the Pokemons
I mean a few years ago during the Pokemon surge
They were out in the parks and they were finding all the Pokemon's they were doing so good at that
But guess what those people are not men why because they have not matured they may have a mature body
But they don't have a mature mind and the way that you get mature as a man is by getting married
That's one of the ways now go to first Corinthians chapter number seven flip back a few chapters there
Here's another benefit of getting married young is that you'll bring less baggage into your marriage when you get married young you will bring less
Baggage into your marriage look at first Corinthians 7 verse 1 it says now concerning the things where have you wrote to me?
It is good for a man not to touch a woman
nevertheless to avoid
Fornication let every man have his own wife and let every woman have her own
Husband notice one of the reasons why people would get married is simply just to avoid
Fornication because let me just tell you the reality when people delay marriage
Until their 30s or their late 20s. They are almost 100% of the time not a virgin
You know what that means is that they spent their teenage years
They spent their 20s going around being a whore sleeping around with all sorts of random people
Then one day they wake up in their 30s
They're like, hey, I want to get married and then they bring in all this baggage into their marriage
Then five years down the road. They're getting a divorce like 50% of the marriages in our country over
50% of our marriages in America are ending in divorce
I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that most Americans are being complete whores and
Whoremongers before getting married, you know
What God's will for you to do is to get married young when your body's changing and when those desires are burning in your heart
You know what the safe thing to do is the Bible says what you should do to avoid fornication
Let every man have his own wife
Let every wife have her own husband and today you're looked at as just insane if you get married young
Well, you know what I think is insane is having bastard children out of wedlock
What I think is insane is that a quarter of Americans have STDs walking around. That's what's insane
What's not insane is a young man saying hey, I want to become a man. I want to get some responsibility
I want to be pure. I want to be right with God. So I'm gonna get married at a young age
That is actually the wise thing to do and the reason why so many marriages are so jacked up today in America and all over
the world is because people are getting married and then they're finding out in their marriage that their wife has a body count in the
Frickin, you know 20s or 30s and vice versa a lot of times and you might think that's not a problem
But if you think that you're an idiot and you've been brainwashed by the world and you need to open your Bible
Look at this what it says in first Corinthians 7 verse 9 says but if they cannot contain
Let them marry for it is better to marry than to burn
What is this talking about saying if you can't contain your fleshly lust your desire to be with someone of the opposite gender
Then you know what you should do. You should get married
Why because it's better to marry than to burn and let me just explain to you
What the life of a single guy who's not married is like it's like this verse and let's just be honest
That's just the reality and so the solution is to find a wife
The solution is to get married look at verse 36
But if any man think that he behaved himself
Uncumely toward his virgin if she passed the flower of her age and needs so require let him do what he will he sin if not
Let them marry
Nevertheless he that standeth steadfast in his heart having no necessity
But have power over his own will have and have so decreed in his heart that he will keep his virgin do it
Well, so notice the Bible saying here that if she's past the flower of her age meaning that the young lady is completely mature
She's past the flower of her age. She's a mature woman. She's an adult if they want to get married they can get married
It's not a sin. Let him do what he will let them marry the Bible says but today what people are doing is they're replacing
Getting married with all sorts of other sinful activities, right today people are replacing
Getting married when they're young with a live-in girlfriend where basically they're together
Their boyfriend and girlfriend and their boyfriend and girlfriend for a long time sometimes years and years and years
But they don't actually pull the trigger and actually get married and let me tell you what that's called
That's called fornication just because you decide to live in a house with someone for years and years and you say like, oh, yeah
We're together. That does not mean that you're married to be
Right in the sight of God to be indulging in that physical relationship. You must be married
There's no exceptions to this whatsoever. And today people are replacing it with well
Let me just live with my girlfriend for five ten years and see if we're compatible
Right then you wake up in your 30s and you guys break up because you weren't bound by law
You guys weren't actually married and then here you are in your 30s and good luck finding a virgin in your 30s
Okay, good luck finding a good girl at that time now go to Psalm
127 Psalm
127 see what people do is they keep putting off marriage to try to find someone better, right?
They're not they're not content with who they found and they're always trying to look for something better
They're always trying to trade up
But then you wake up someday and you realize that your options are slim
Because everyone's pretty much already gotten married and you find yourself at 35 and there's really not a whole lot of great options out
There you know another benefit of getting married young is that you have more time in your marriage to bond together
Because let's just be honest your 20s are some pretty difficult years your 20s are hard. You're you're learning life
You're going from living at home to establishing your own home your own career. You're popping out babies. You're getting married
I mean, it's a difficult time. Let's just be honest and it's nice to go through those years
Struggling building character together with your spouse because that bond that you guys are building in
Those years are gonna carry with you for the rest of your life
You're building a strong foundation in your marriage at that time when things are hard to carry you through the rest
So here's the great thing about getting married young if your wife decides to marry you young men when you're young
That means she actually likes you you want to know why because you have no money
There's nothing great about you
Like you haven't you haven't like built this great net worth or anything like that like you're just starting out in the workforce
You're not making a ton of money. So if your wife marries you she actually loves you
But you know a lot of people they're really rich and every girl wants to marry them
But guess what it's not often because they actually love the guy is because they just love money
So here's a great reason to get married when you're young to find out if your wife actually likes you. Okay now
Here's another great benefit getting married young is that you can have a lot more children
Look at what Psalm 127 verse 3 says low children are in heritage of the Lord and the fruit of the womb is his
Reward as arrows are in the hand of a mighty man
So our children of the youth happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them
They shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate
Notice the Bible says that a person who has lots of children who has their quiver full of children that that person is actually
Happy yet. What does the world tell you today that being a parent is a curse that being parent being a parent is nothing
But a burden and let's be honest, of course, it is a burden. It is a burden, but it's a burden. That's worth undertaking
it's a burden that God wants us to take upon our shoulders because there's a lot of
Blessings that come along with it. And when you have a lot of children in your youth, you know
That means that when you're 40 you're gonna have grown kids and that's pretty cool that you could still be young and hang out
With your kids. I think that's a cool thing, you know, if you have kids when you're really young
It's a good chance. You're gonna see your grandchildren. It's a good chance. You could see your great grandchildren
you know me I met several of my great-great grandparents and
That's pretty cool. That's a great blessing that I've had in my life now go to Malachi chapter number two Malachi
Chapter number two, you know, the Bible teaches that children are a blessing
This is something that the world is constantly trying to get people to not believe
You have these people
Making tik-tok videos and Instagram videos where they're just bragging about how they're adult married couples without kids and like wow
Look at me. Look at all this cool stuff I could do
Look how quickly I could get in and out of my car without dealing with the car seats, you know
Look how quick our bedtime routine and everything like that is but it's like, okay
We'll see who's talking though when you're 70 and 80 and we'll see when you're in the nursing home and no one cares about you
And the only people visiting you are preachers from steadfast Baptist Church
You know, because you're you didn't have any children. It's like we'll see we'll see how happy you are then
Malachi 2 verse 15 and did he not make one yet?
Had he the residue of the spirit and wherefore once why did God make the twain one flesh?
Why did God do this that he might seek a godly seed?
Therefore take heed to your spirit and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth
You know the Bible literally says that one of the reasons God created marriage is to have children
So if you get married and you are purposely deciding in your heart
I refuse to have children then why even get married because God said wherefore one
Why did he make two one so that he can seek a godly seed?
That's one of the reasons why and the Bible saying here let no man deal treacherously with the wife of his youth
You know, there's a lot of men today that are afraid of growing up that are afraid of taking on responsibility
And so they're purposely not having children and you know what you're doing
You're dealing treacherously with the wife of your youth when you force your wife to take birth control and ruin her body
You are dealing treacherously with the wife of your youth
You know, I had this one family member who is just a complete just terrible person most liberal person
You could possibly imagine he married this woman and upon condition of him marrying this woman
He forced her to tie her tubes before they were married and guess what they were divorced in like a year
Just ruining her life ruining her body making it to where she could never have kids again in her entire life
You know what?
That's someone that was dealing treacherously with their wife and ladies don't ever marry a guy that doesn't want to have children
That's a terrible idea because chances are you're dealing with someone who's very selfish with someone who's very immature
With someone that only cares about himself
Look, it's one thing if you can't have kids without fault of your own, you know, your body just isn't fertile whatever
That's a different story. But when your husband is making you not have children, you know what?
That's someone that's dealing treacherous with you and you should you know
Instead of just sitting across from each other while you're dating making googly eyes at each other the whole time
You know, you should actually talk about things that matter like do you want to have kids someday and not be an idiot and just
Tie the knot with someone and be like, oh wow, my husband doesn't want to have any kids
It's like you're screwed
You should have talked about those things when you were dating getting married young is a blessing having children when you're young is a
Blessing go back to Proverbs chapter number five. So number one getting married young is a virtue. I got married young
I thank God for it. I was 21 for maybe a couple days when I got married
My wife was 18. There's people that have been married younger than us. But in those times we've had four kids
We're still in our 20s and I'm glad that we've done that. I wouldn't trade that for anything in the world. Was it hard?
Yes, it was hard. But you know what it was worth it
It was absolutely worth it number two men's affections should only be for their wife
look at Proverbs 5 verse 18 let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of thy
Youth, you know the Bible's here doesn't say hey go have fun with other women go indulge in other women
The Bible says to rejoice with the wife of thy youth and what we need to understand is that marriage is an exclusive
Relationship and it's crazy that you even have to say things like this, but you know what we're living in such a backwards world
We're living in such a messed up time where people are now thinking things like open relationships are okay
people in the workplace will just openly talk about their adultery and
About their desires for other women in front of other married men and no one says anything people just act like it's okay
Like it's normal. You know what the Bible is against that your affections as a man should only be for your wife
Go to Proverbs chapter 5. Let's skip down to verse 15. Now. What are some ways that your affections can only be towards your wife
Well, here's a big one. How about don't commit adultery look at verse 15 drink waters out of thine own
Cistern and running waters out of thine own well
Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad and rivers of waters in the streets
Let them be only thine own and not strangers with you if you're old enough in the room today
I hope you know what waters is talking about here. All right. It's not really talking about well
It's talking about something else. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant row
Let her breasts satisfy thee at all times and be thou ravished always with her love
And why wilt thou my son be ravished with a strange woman and embrace the bosom of a stranger?
For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord and he pondereth all his goings
You know, the Bible is very against this idea of going to another woman for this activity
You know what that's called that's called adultery and our society has just forgotten what a serious sin
This is and all the movies and all the TV shows want to make adultery look like something that's fun
And something that's cool and something that people should partake in but you know what in the eyes of God
It is wicked as hell
And in fact God hates it so much in the Old Testament
You would have the death penalty for committing adultery when this country was founded when the original colonies were founded if you committed adultery
Oftentimes in some of these areas you would be put to death and you know what?
That's how it should be today because today if we had the death penalty on adultery, there would be a lot less adultery in this world
Yes, it's a natural temptation. Yes men and women are drawn towards this
But when it's the death penalty that's gonna cause a lot of people to not go down that road
You know, this is why we need laws in our world is because it keeps us from evil
It's like the stupid abortion argument like my body my choice, you know
How can you make laws against what someone does with their body when it's like hey
Every single law that exists is telling you what you can do with your body and what you can't do with your body
You know what we need some laws in America that says here's something you can't do with your body
You can't go in unto another man's wife women can't go to another husband. That's wicked as hell on the side of God now
Here's the way to avoid adultery. How do you avoid it?
What the Bible says is to drink waters out of your own cistern and so there's nothing wrong with that relationship
It's not like that relationship is dirty or sinful or anything like that. No, it's great. It's holy
It's beautiful something that God created to be enjoyed
But he created it to be enjoyed between a husband and wife and them alone for their entire life
He didn't create it for you to enjoy a bunch of that before you're married
He didn't create it for you to get married and then enjoy a bunch of other women after that
No, it's one man one woman for life go to Proverbs 6 turn the page Proverbs chapter number 6 verse 32
But who so committeth adultery with a woman lacketh
Understanding he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul
What is the Bible saying here someone that goes and commits adultery is a foolish person this person lacks
Understanding why because they're hurting themselves
They're hurting their most important relationship that they have on their life
Oftentimes men will trash their entire life for this one event
I mean, you're married you own a house together. You've got a good job
You've got children together and men will literally flush all of it down the trash for one experience with another woman
And let me tell you something. Let me just try to wake you up to something right now
The Bible teaches that if your spouse commits adultery that they are to forgive you and restore you that is what the Bible teaches
But let me just wake you up to the reality of life
If you commit adultery your spouse may not do that
And so don't just bank on the fact that oh I could do whatever I want cuz my wife will never leave me
My wife will always forgive me. Okay, she should yes
That's the reality of what should happen, but let me just wake you up about life
If you cheat on your wife, she might just leave you she might just divorce you and while that's wrong, too
Let me just try to warn you before you make this stupid decision
Before you lose your house before your kids are being raised by someone else
Before your paycheck is being money taken out of it for the rest of your life or until their kids turn 18
It's not worth it. It's never worth it
Your affections need to be to your own wife
Look at verse 33 a wound and dishonor shall he get and his reproach
Shall not be wiped away if you commit adultery. There is a stain. There is a mark on your life of
Dishonor there's a reproach on your head that will never be wiped away
By the way, the Bible says that pastors are supposed to be blameless
You know, no man should ever be ordained in the ministry if they've ever committed adultery
Disqualified why because the Bible says that your reproach
Shall not be wiped away and we need to get back to a place in America
Where committing adultery is so shocking and horrifying that people have a reproach on them for the rest of their life
Why because if we got back to shaming adulterers, maybe the next generation wouldn't have so much adultery
Maybe we wouldn't have to go to work as men and listen to a bunch of idiots talk about other women all day
When they're married when there was actually a reproach and a shame on their life
Look at verse 34 for jealousy is the rage of a man. Therefore. He will not spare in the day of vengeance
He will not regard any ransom. Neither will he rest content though. Thou givest many gifts
You know, let's talk about this again. What's right versus reality. Okay, what's right is the Bible says?
Not to murder someone, but let me just tell you what might happen to you
If you sleep with another man's wife, he might literally kill you. He might just end your life
I mean, what is it saying there for jealousy is the rage of a man
Therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance
He will not regard any ransom neither will he rest content though thou givest many gifts
I mean there has been this has happened so many times
it's not even funny where a man finds out what's happening and he just grabs the guy and just kills her or
Sometimes this happens too. And again, I'm not saying this is right. I'm just telling you that this could happen
Sometimes he kills his wife too. And so this is not a sin to be playing around with
This is not something that God is gonna show a whole lot of mercy on and man as well
This is something that we need to take extremely seriously that men's affections should only be for their wife
Now go to Proverbs 5. What are some applications from this truth?
Well, not only should our affections only be towards our wife
Not only should we just not commit adultery, but let's take that another step
Why don't we just say this?
Let's not even flirt with other women if you're married look if you're married those days are gone
Don't think that you can still go and hit up ladies and flirt with other women
You know what that needs to just be turned off in your life. It's gone. It's done
But men do this look at Proverbs 5 verse 3 for the lips of a strange woman
Drop as in honeycomb and her mouth is smoother than oil
But her end is bitter as wormwood sharp as a two-edged sword
Let her feet go down to death her steps take hold on hell lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life
Her ways are movable that thou canst not know them hear me now
Therefore oh you children and depart not from the words of my mouth notice this next phrase
Remove thy way far from her and come not nigh the door of her house
What is the strange woman? It's not like saying she lives in Portland or something like that
What it's saying is that she's foreign to you
She's someone other than your wife and what does the Bible say to do to the strange woman?
It says to remove thy way far from her
It doesn't say let's see how close to the line of cheating on my wife
I can get without actually cheating on her because this is what a lot of men do a lot of men
They think it's fun to go flirt with other women
And so the strange woman comes and they'll just get right up to the line, but they won't necessarily cheat on their wife
They'll flirt with her. They'll compliment her. They'll have long conversations with her
They'll do all these inappropriate things with her, but they never full-on and go commit adultery
We know what the principle for us what the Bible says just remove thyself far from her when there's a strange woman
You know don't play with this sin. This is something that the Bible says to run away from you know Joseph when there was a strange
Woman that was coming on to him. He literally ran away so fast that she had his clothes his clothes in her hands
He wasn't playing around with this. He took this seriously now
I'll read for you first Thessalonians 522 it says this abstain from all appearance of evil
Bible does not teach that we should only just abstain from the actual sin itself
But rather we should abstain from things that even look like sin
So what this means is that you're not gonna if you want to live a godly life as a man
You shouldn't just be hanging out with all these other women. You shouldn't have
Girlfriends friends that are girls. No, once you get married your friend. That's a girl is your wife
You want to have a friend? That's a girl call your grandmother call your mom call your sister and call your wife
But you know what you don't have friends that are girls. I don't have any friends that are girls. You're not my friend
You're my sister in Christ and you know, I love you as a sister in Christ
I want to be kind and respectful towards you
Of course, you know don't get this weird idea where we take this to such an extreme where it's like, you know
Brother fur walks into church. It's like hey brother fur. How's it going?
That's like, you know like like you could say hello mrs. Furr. Good to see you
Like you don't get so weird with this, but here's the thing. Don't just go have this super long conversation with a woman
That's not your wife. Don't go hanging out alone with a woman. That's not your wife. That is inappropriate. That is wrong
Now what are some ways that people do this go to Proverbs chapter number six Proverbs six flip the page verse 25
It says lust not after her beauty in thine heart. Notice this neither let her take thee with her eyelids
What is this talking about?
Look, I think if you're an adult in this room, everyone knows what this is talking about women strange women whores
When they choose a target when they want to hunt after the precious life
You know how they initiate that is with their face with their facial expression
We all know what I'm talking about when a woman is giving you the look look if you see that
What does the Bible say neither let her take thee with her eyelids?
You know us men if you notice a woman giving you an inappropriate look don't fall into that trap
Don't go get closer to that
Don't try to play around with that woman and see if you can go flirt with her anything like that
No
She wants to try to take you with her eyelids remove your that way far from her the Bible says don't play around with this
Don't even lust after other women look at the beginning part of this verse lust not after her beauty
In nine hearts, and you know this is something that's just rampant in our world today. It's everywhere. It's every billboard
It's every social media app
You know I was working with a couple of guys one time and they're both married and they start pointing out this girl
She's like Dylan. What do you think about this girl? Look at this girl over here, and I was like hey
Aren't you guys married you're like yeah, so what I was like
So do you want me to just slap you for your wife, and they're like what are you talking about?
I was like you guys need to grow up you guys need to stop this
You know what don't be afraid to tell people to frickin change their attitude on this
You know the reason why it's so like accepted to do this is because men that actually love the Lord are like so
Cowardly around all these people, but you know what don't go and just allow your friends to go talk about other women
Of course men are always gonna struggle with this
but there's a difference between struggling with sin and being proud of it and
Bringing it to everyone's attention. There's a difference between slipping up and walking in the flesh and lusting after another woman to being like
Hey guys, let's all go do this together. Hey married friend. What do you think about that girl?
You know what that shame on you if you do that shame on you
If you are so comfortable around your friends or your brothers that you've just got after other women and talk about it
Like it's cool. You know, this is the the macho culture in America is every beer gutted
Dad has a freaking magazine cover in his garage with all the calendars of the naked women, right?
And it's like newsflash dude, you know
I don't think that this supermodel that you're lusting after really cares for your $50,000 a year. Just wake up, man
Stop thinking you've got it. You don't go to job 31 job 31 now
How can we try to do our best to control this area of our lives because don't let preachers lie to you and say that
You could just you know sinless perfection. Once you get saved, you'll never have a wicked thought again. You'll never sin again
No, this is gonna be a struggle to the day you die
And so I just want to be honest with you and honest with you ladies too so that you could
Understand what's happening with your husband, you know, don't be so naive or you get married and then all of a sudden it shocks you
That this happens. This is how men just are this is how God has created men
It's not an excuse for it, but this is just how we are
But how can we control this look at Job 31 verse 1 Job said this I made a covenant with mine eyes
Why then should I think upon a maid?
Here's the truth once you see a scantily clad woman as a man
You can't really control how you feel about that
But what you could try to do is prevent seeing it in the first place or if you see a woman that's scantily clad
You immediately turn away. You don't just sit there and feast your eyes on it because why Bible says I made a covenant with mine
Eyes, why then should I think upon a maid?
You know what goes into your eyes is going to affect what you think about and if you just spend all day every day
Like most men in America do having no filter for their eyes whatsoever
Not even trying to control themselves in this area
you know what your heart is going to be filled with your heart is going to be filled with a bunch of
Discontentment for your wife a bunch of lust in your heart for other women and it's gonna lead you down a road
To possibly cause you to commit actual adultery and ruin your entire life go to Proverbs chapter number four Proverbs chapter number four
Look at verse number 25 of Proverbs chapter 4 says let thine eyes
Look right on and let thine eyelids look straight before thee ponder the path of thy feet
And let all thy ways be established turn not to the right hand nor to the left remove thy foot from evil
you know we need to as men as much as possible be vigilant and
Purposeful with where our eyes are going not just aimlessly
Carelessly walking up and down the streets and not, you know thinking about this at all and just not caring if you're indulging in this
No, you need to be thinking that your eyes need to be looking straight on that your eye
Eyelids need to be looking straight before you and not just partaking in this go to 1st Corinthians 7 while you're turning there
I'll read for you Malachi
214 it says yet you say wherefore because the Lord hath been witnessed between thee and the wife of thy youth
Against whom thou has dealt treacherously yet. Is she thy companion and the wife of thy covenant?
You know, the Bible is talking here about how you could deal treacherously with your wife
Let me just explain to you men while it is a natural temptation for us to do this
If you just allow yourself day in day out to just look at other women and lust after other women
You are dealing treacherously with your wife
You are harming and doing something that's hurtful to your wife and this is what the devil wants
I mean the devil wants to break up homes. He wants to break up marriages. He wants to break up families
that's why when you open up your stupid smartphone and you go to a social media app and you just hit the discovery page and you're
just doom-scrolling like we talked about several weeks ago just mindlessly opening your phone just world please fill my brain
You know what's gonna be popping up a lot on your phone a bunch of scantily clad women
Why because the devil wants you to sit there lusting after other women in your heart to cause you to be discontent
To ruin your home to ruin your marriage to deal treacherously with your wife
You know what? This is something that we need to take control of as men now of course while it's never acceptable
It's never okay for men to go down this road
You know women at home also have a role to play where they can help their husband
Minimize this area in his life. Look at 1st Corinthians 7 verse 10
It says nevertheless to avoid fornication
Let every man have his own wife and let every woman have her own husband
Let the husband render unto the wife do benevolence and likewise also the wife unto the husband
The wife hath not power of her own body. Sorry feminists, but the husband and likewise also the husband
Have not power of his own body, but the wife notice defraud ye not one the other
Accept it be with consent for a time that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer and come together again
That Satan tempt you not for your in
Continency so notice Satan is ready to tempt us for man's ability to not contain himself in this area
And so in order to prevent men and women from being tempted by the devil to sin in this area
What has God given us he's given us marriage and the Bible teaches that men should give to their wives do
Benevolence and not withhold that physical relationship from her and on the other hand the Bible says for the wife to give her husband
Do benevolence and not withhold that physical relationship from him and if you do if you are doing that
What does the Bible say the Bible says that you're defrauding one another. This is called
marital fraud and
Again, what am I talking about? Not necessarily right, but let me just wake you up to the reality of life
Okay, what is right is that a man would only ever look at his wife and only ever be interested in his wife and only enjoy
That relationship with his wife. But let me just tell you the reality if you want to be a feminist if you want to
Indulge in the mentality of the world and withhold this relationship from your husband
Let me just wake you up to the reality of what happened what might happen. He may go down that road
He may start lusting after other women. He may go commit adultery
And while that's a hundred percent wrong and we need to condemn that every single time
I'm just telling you that women have a role to play in this as well
And if you are indulging in this stupid mentality where you're just withholding this from your husband
And it's a once-a-year thing for you guys are just this weird mentality that a lot of marriages have right now
Just expect your marriage to blow up just expect to fail expect your marriage to not last
Because the Bible says to not defraud each other in this area and the world wants to tell you that there's such a thing as
Marital rape look you gave consent at the wedding altar when you said to have and to hold
You know what that means to have and to hold all the days of your life, and you said I do
What does the Bible say the Bible says you have to have consent not to partake in this relationship and see just everything the world
teaches is just the opposite of the Bible and it's so funny how the world wants to hate on
Christianity and on fundamentalism and they look at our families and they think we're insane because men are in charge women obey
We've got lots of kids, but you know what when you follow this
In the Bible you're gonna have a pretty happy marriage and the world while they're out scoffing at us
You know, they're trying to find some barfly whore once a month if they're lucky
Because they don't have a wife at home because they don't have a wife that obeys the Bible at home
Let me just tell you you want to enjoy this area of your life
Get married young and do what the Bible says and you could actually enjoy this area of your life
Way more than the world does even though they make all the music videos that makes them look like you're having a great time
Let me tell you what their life sucks. They're often full of disease. They've got a bunch of divorce
They've got feminist wives that are not, you know giving this area and you know
The Bible's way is just always better in all areas of life go to Proverbs chapter 5 Proverbs chapter number 5
Number 3 men should develop and maintain a friendship with their wife Proverbs 5 8 5 18
Let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of thy youth see though
the Bible does cheat teach that men are in charge and that their wives are to submit to them and that the Bible literally says
That women were created for the man women were created to be the help fitting for their husband
While that is true. You don't want to get this weird mentality that you just look at your wife as some sort of
robotic slave that the only role in life that she has is to cook your food and clean your house and do what you tell
Her to do and then you just ignore her and forget about her the whole rest of your life
That's a weird mentality that some men have but notice the Bible actually says to rejoice with the wife of your youth
You know what that implies that implies that you guys aren't just married, but you're actually friends, too
you're actually rejoicing because you enjoy spending time together and
sometimes men they do this because they get busy with work or they get busy with their hobbies and they can get to the point where
They just neglect their wife and this is something that us as men need to avoid, you know
We talked a few weeks ago about the importance of
Prioritization and if you have a goal in your life of having a good marriage you must
Prioritize your wife you must schedule in time in your day to spend with your family as much as possible
And you know, I don't recommend
Man to take these jobs that causes them to be away from their wife for weeks and months at a time, you know
Yeah, the pay may be good. But is it really worth your marriage oftentimes to just neglect that relationship?
I don't think so go to song of Solomon chapter number 5 song of Solomon chapter number 5 song of Solomon 5
This verse we're gonna read in verse 16 is from the perspective of the wife
It says his mouth is most sweet. Yay. He is altogether lovely
This is my beloved and this is my friend Oh daughters of Jerusalem
You know, I hope every person in here can honestly say that about their spouse that this is my beloved
But not only that this is my friend and you know if you're not there if you in your heart right now are thinking
You know what? I can't really say that honestly about my spouse
You know what you need to do men. You need to be the leader
You need to invest in your wife. You need to prioritize your wife. You need to be friends with your wife again
You need to date your wife again. You need to treat this relationship
not as something that's just you know, she's some doormat for you, but that she's something that you cherish and love and
You know the reason why us as men would be so devoted to our careers and be so devoted and putting so much time into work
Would be to provide for her, right?
So you don't want to provide for her so much at the expense where you're now just forgetting to spend time with her
It just doesn't make any sense. Go to 1st Peter chapter 3 1st Peter chapter 3 1st Peter 3 verse 7 says this
Likewise ye husbands dwell with them
according to knowledge
Giving honor unto the wife as unto the weaker vessel and as being heirs together of the grace of life that your prayers be not
Hindered, you know, the Bible says that we're supposed to dwell with our wives according to knowledge
We are supposed to get to know them
We're supposed to figure out what their likes and dislikes are and you know what?
This is a lifelong process because women just don't make sense
So for us as men
We need to try our best spend as much time with them as possible to just learn a little bit more about them every day
And if it's shifting well, you need to learn that new shifting part. Okay, but us as men
Look just dwell with your wife according to knowledge. Look at this. Actually stay there
I'll read for you Colossians 3 19
It says husbands love your wives and be not bitter against them
You know, I think one of the biggest things that's preventing husbands from being friends with their wives is bitterness
The Bible is saying here that us as husbands we should not be bitter with our wives. What is bitterness?
It's unresolved conflict and here's what you have to understand about marriage
Is that there's gonna be conflict meaning that there's gonna be wrongdoing on both sides and when you're bitter against someone
What that means is that that person did something wrong to you
They did something that they shouldn't have done or they hurt you in some way and you're not being forgiving to that person
You're not letting go of it rather you're harboring all this negative emotion and feeling towards that person and not forgiving them
And you know, what's gonna hinder being friends with your spouse is bitterness. And so rather than thinking well
Yeah, I'm not really good friends with my wife this morning because she isn't good at this and she isn't good at that
well
why don't you look in the mirror and why don't you ask yourself if you as a man have been harboring bitterness against your wife because
That's something that you are in control of and so you're saying oh, you know, I'm not that great friends with my wife
Well, have you forgiven your wife or are you just harboring all this bitterness against her because if you are you're not gonna be very good
Friends with your wife go to Proverbs chapter number five Proverbs chapter number five now last point this morning
The lesson we can learn from this vor verse is that number four men should never divorce
The wife of thy youth look at Proverbs 5 5 verse 18
It says let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of thy youth
See if you get married young no matter what age you are
You could always look at your wife as being the wife of your youth
And if you are to rejoice with the wife of your youth that implies that you're doing that your entire life
Not that you're moving on to another woman and then rejoicing with her because you divorced your first spouse
No, rather you should never ever divorce the wife of your youth go to Matthew chapter 19 Matthew chapter 19
But again, the world always has the exact opposite philosophy of the Bible
The world says you're not happy in your marriage. You go trade up to a better man. You go girl
You leave your husband you double your closet space
You go ahead and just buy all those Amazon packages
Don't let him tell you what you can and cannot do find a better man that'll let you do whatever you want
This is what the this is what the world teaches look at Matthew 19 verse 6 wherefore they are no more twain
But one flesh what therefore God hath joined together
Let not man put asunder the Bible teaches that when you got married to your wife
He made you one flesh and what God has joined together
No, man has the authority to put asunder. I don't care what the laws of the state of Oklahoma are or the laws of America
The Bible says divorce is wicked divorce is always wrong
There is no reason in the Bible to divorce
You know what this subject makes me angry because though I love a lot of our old independent fundamental Baptist brethren
You know
I read I've read many of their books and I've heard many of their sermons and almost all of them are completely
Wrong on this issue because great men of God that I respect
I've read their literature and they say that they counsel women to divorce their husband if he cheats on them or vice versa
You know what the Bible says what God hath joined together. Let not man put us under so I'm just telling you
You're never ever gonna come to me and complain about your spouse and I'm gonna tell you yeah, go ahead and get a divorce
It's just never gonna happen. So just don't even do it at all. Look at Luke chapter number 16 Luke chapter number 16
I'm gonna tell you to rejoice with the wife of thy youth
I'm gonna tell you to stop being so bitter and to forgive your wife
I'm gonna tell you to go provide for her
I'm gonna go tell you to spend some time with her to love her to cherish her
But I'm never going to tell you to divorce your wife for any reason Luke 16 18
Whosoever put it away his wife and marryeth another
Committeth adultery and whosoever marry of her that is put away from her husband
Committeth adultery you have a lot of Baptist churches in America that are facilitating
adulterous weddings today where some man of God is taking a woman who divorced her husband and
Marrying her to another man. You know what he's doing. He's putting a big stamp of approval on adultery. That is wicked as hell
Let me give you some practical reasons to never divorce because I realize some people don't care about the Bible
Some people don't care about what God says shame on you if that's the case
But let me just give you some practical reasons why you should never divorce
Here's number one is that it harms your children
Everyone knows this the world knows this that if you divorce your spouse that is gonna be harmful to your children
That is gonna be emotionally
Taxing on your children. Why because when parents get divorced often times
Parents want their kids to choose sides and they want to turn the hearts of their children away from one of their parents
you know what that is a harmful thing to do to your child children are supposed to be raised in the
Home of their father and mother who love each other and when you rip that home apart
You are doing damage to your children. And here's another thing, you know, oftentimes
parents will divorce and
the wife will go find some other man and then that random other man is raising these children and
Oftentimes that man abuses those children and there's been thousands and thousands of cases
Where mom's new boyfriend mom's new husband is actually sexual predator molesting those kids
And you know what that would never ever happen
When you if you would have just stayed with your first husband and so people are like, oh, you know
Don't just stay married for the kids when you got to be happy
You have to feel like your marriage is a romance novel at all times or you should divorce who cares about the kids
You know what staying together for the kids is a good enough reason if you say I'm not friends with my spouse today
But I have kids and I'm staying together with my wife for my kids
Look, I hope in the future your marriage gets better and I believe it can but that is a good enough reason to stay married
Right there to not harm your children. Another reason is
Econa economic ruin of the home. I mean people ruin themselves financially getting divorced, you know
They make it to their 40s and 50s. They own a house
They've got a good job and then they get a divorce and they just hand lawyers all the assets that they have
They split up their home
They lose all their money now
They're living in apartments separated from each other and now dad is paying half his paycheck to alimony
And half his paycheck to child support and their their lives have been completely ruined
Economically just because they got divorced. Hey, you know what?
I'm glad it's that way because I hope that it's a little bit of an incentive for people not to get divorced to realize
Hey, if I leave my wife, you know, my pocketbook is gonna be destroyed for the foreseeable future
By the way in the state of Oklahoma, this is a common-law marriage state
So if you are common-law married to someone here in Oklahoma and you wanted to dissolve that relationship
You have to get a legal divorce in the state of Oklahoma
So keep that in mind before you want to shack up with your girlfriend and have her living in your house
And going around telling people that you're married. Hey, you better be serious about that relationship
And if you are why don't you just get married the right way the first place another reason you should never get divorced is the public
Shame that comes involved with that. You know, everyone's gonna know your business and in fact man
This is true because when we bought our house the real estate agent told us that the reason they're selling their house is because they're getting divorced
That's sad. That sucks. They had two little kids and they're getting divorced
But when we moved in when we met all of our neighbors even neighbors that live like 20 houses down from us
They're like, yeah, these guys got divorced. It was really crazy. All my neighbors keep saying this
It was really crazy. I'm like, what is that?
Like how crazy was this divorce like you live 20 houses down. How do you even know?
But you know what that is public shame everyone on our street knew about this divorce
I don't even know all the neighbors on my street, but yet everyone knew about this divorce
I can guarantee you all their family knew - if all their neighbors knew their family knew their co-workers knew their church knew and you
Know what? It is a shameful thing to be divorced. We have so many people today
Confirming divorce you go girl you go find a better girl man
But you know what the Bible says that he that commits adultery his reproach shall never be wiped away
And so you know what I'm glad there's some shame for getting divorced because it's a shameful thing to do
Here's another reason you should never get divorced is that when you marry the second time
It's gonna be a much lower quality person because here's the thing when you get married when you're young
What do we talk about? Your wife actually loves you because you're worthless. You make no money. Okay
Your wife is probably a virgin at least. I hope you're marrying a virgin
But here's the thing you get divorced when you're 35 you get divorced when you're 45
50 you want to know what type of people are out on the market other people that suck at marriage like you other people that were
Terrible spouses and are divorced also and so it's like wow the divorce rates for people that have been married the second time are
Higher than the first yeah, because guess what these are two problem people getting married
You should have just stayed with your first spouse and sometimes men man
This pisses me off men as they get older and they do make more money
You know you start to fill out
You're you're more muscular at age 30 than you were at age 18 or 19 and men start thinking they're so cool
And they're all that in a bag of chips, and they're thinking I could find a better woman
You know what you're wicked as hell if you want to leave the wife of your youth don't divorce the wife of your youth because you
Think you're so cool now because you think you could find better
You know what shame on you, and I hear situations like this. I see situations like this. You know what it is sickening
I want a prideful disgusting thought that you think you're so cool now that you want to leave the wife of your youth
Never divorce the wife of your youth it also just makes Christianity look bad
I mean it makes Christianity look bad when the Bible teaches
never to divorce when the Bible teaches to love your wife when the Bible teaches for wives to submit to their husbands and then
Marriages in Christianity are just so terrible and marriages and Christianity are just falling apart
you know what would it say about our church if just all of the marriages in this
Building just dissolved and everyone's in here committing adultery and everyone's in here running around with other people's wives
You know that makes it makes Christianity look bad. And you know what modern Christianity this liberal version of Christianity this new evangelical
Love everything don't preach against any sin that Christianity does look bad because it is bad because it's a perversion of Christianity
It's not what the Bible actually teaches. Here's another reason not to get divorced is that divorced people are always less happy
You know, I don't care what your friends told you that you're gonna be happier
But every divorced person I've ever met was always miserable. Isn't that funny?
Isn't that funny how everyone thinks my life's gonna be so much better when I get rid of my wife
my life's gonna be so much better when I get rid of my husband, but then you meet them at the workplace you meet them out in
About life and they always are just miserable. They are living alone. Their kids have moved out of the house
They come home to some chihuahuas and that's all they got and here's another thing. That's them
Now, you know what else sucks about getting divorced. It's called old age
And this is something people often don't think about they blow up their marriage in their 40s and 50s
Let's see how you feel about that in your 60s and 70s and your 80s when you've got no one when you've got no one
To take care of you, you know part of marriage is
Investing in your youth into a strong relationship that it's literally till death do us part that we are gonna take care of each other
We are gonna love each other for better or for worse in
sickness and in health in poverty and in wealth forsaking all others
Literally till death do us part and people that have the most blessed old age are people that still have the wife of their youth
A woman that is stuck by him for 40 50 years
That is a beautiful thing right there and go talk to the older people that have been married for a long time
Go talk to the men that haven't you know forsaken the wife of their youth. You know what they're gonna tell you
They're gonna tell you that everything I'm saying this morning is right. They're gonna say hey
Yeah, that guy may be in his 20s, but I'm over here and I'm an older man now
And I've got the wife of my youth
But you know what everything he's saying is right right now because it's coming from the word of God. It's not my opinion
It's not my philosophy. It's the Bible go to Proverbs chapter number five will close with this verse Proverbs chapter number five
Proverbs chapter number five verse 18. Let's read it again. Let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of
Thy youth, you know, the sermon is definitely more directed towards the married men in the room this morning
But look hey if you're not married go find you a wife while you're young
Because guess what the Bible says to rejoice with the wife of your youth
Now I might preach a whole sermon someday called how to find a wife. It's gonna be like the most practical sermon ever
Someone some people need it in this room
All right, but look if you're not married go find your wife
And if you are married, you know, don't let the world lie to you
Don't let the world cause you to be jaded with marriage
don't let the world lie to you and tell you that you going out and
Flirting with some other woman and committing adultery on your wife is gonna make your life better
You know ladies don't let the world lie to you and say well if I just leave my husband
And I just marry that dude that makes more money. I'm gonna be so much happier. You know what those are all lies
What does the Bible say what does God say to rejoice with the wife of thy youth? Let's pray Lord
Thank you for this day. Thank you for the marriages in this room. Thank you for my wife Lord what blessing she is to me
I just pray that you've blessed all the marriages in this room that people would be faithful to their spouses that people would love their spouses and
That you would just pause other people in this room to get married and find a great spouse for them
That they could serve the Lord with for all of their life. We love you and you see me pray. Amen